What's with all the Hate? Hint: It's Often more about Fear!

The year 2020 was a tipping point in our history. A global pandemic, economic strife, uncertainty, chaos, death, grief, violence and hate, people bled and cities burned. Sadly, all of which highlighted the income inequality, racial and gender marginalization and injustice, prejudice, mental health issues etc and the darkest parts of humanity that existed long before that moment in time.

Given the occurrence of global and ongoing events, 2020 catapulted us into a dark & heavy time. Regardless of whether we were there to experience these events in person, or viewing it on our screens, we had the means and were often drowning in the news of a world on fire, unprecedented times, all of which was a perfect storm for unprecedented severe and chronic stress.

I’ve shared in a previous article some of the personal psychological implications this stress has on us.

In this article, I’d like to share some psychological theories that explain some of the unbelievable brutality and aggression going on in our hurting world.

Anxiety & Aggression: Activates the Same Brain Circuit

Aggression falls on a continuum and the brain circuit that is activated when one is afraid, is the same circuit that is activated when one is aggressive. 

The amygdala is one of the main fight or flight, arousal circuits (the central command) that sends the signal to the rest of the body to mobilize its troops by releasing energy, more oxygen, blood, hormones, muscles on the alert etc. to run like heck or try to stay and fight the threat.

A bit simplified but goes like this.... A real or imagined threat is detected by our brain (the amygdala is very good at threat detection). We then go from…

Arousal- early detection, "what's up...something seems wrong"?

Anxiety- something is to be feared in this environment

Anger- ok, lets mobilize energy & get the rest of the troops/body on board to attack/defend the threat

Aggression- The manifestation of anger, the behavior of attacking/defending against the real/imagined fear/threat

As you can imagine, most people don’t like this heightened sense of threat, arousal/anxiety and this progression from arousal to aggression can happen quite quickly. While some may engage in activities like exercise, journaling, talking to a friend, meditation etc. to bring their stress system-response back to balance (these are all beneficial things to do…assuming a real threat isn’t present), other people will resort to “Displaced Aggression” i.e. being highly aroused, anxious/angry and then become aggressive to any minute slight e.g. being asked to put their mask on in a store by retail staff and then venting, raging on them. A level 1 request, somehow got a level 10 rage response.

Unfortunately, the more real/perceived stress or threat there is, there tends to be more of this displaced-aggressive response. Someone is in fear and trying to turn down their aroused/agitated response by blowing up and discharging all the built-up energy to an unsuspecting, un-provoking bystander. In no way am I saying this is the only response or in any way saying that this behavior is ok. It's just helpful to notice what is going on inside of you and others.

Another theory that really makes sense to our current world of people behaving badly is "Terror Management Theory".

Fear & Extremist Thinking

When human beings are experiencing existential threat e.g. a global pandemic and possible illness, death, riots, possible loss of life etc., for many people, this type of threat, the kind that highlights the possibility of death, kicks reasoning and inclusive thinking to the curb i.e. think “extremism” instead.

This type of potential threat, the terror of possible death tends to activate an “us vs them” mentality and heightened stress response.  When our meaning systems are undermined or attacked, we seek to defend from or destroy whatever attacks us, this can become an ideology of “kill or be killed”. This meaning system can be about one's religion, national identity, political affiliation, culture etc. The differences between people are heightened, polarization ensues ("how can we both be right? One of us i.e. you must be wrong"). Moral certainty is stressed, not reason or any evidence that may be contrary to the meaning systems we might cling to, in an attempt to protect against this existential terror/threat.

In an interesting experiment, social psychologists reminded participants of their mortality, shortly afterward, groups that they perceived were unlike them in terms of their values, affiliations etc. were seen as more threatening than if not having been primed of their eventual demise. One study revealed that people given “mortality reminders” not only felt more negatively toward those perceived as “other,” but were also willing to inflict more pain on them (to keep the study within acceptable ethical boundaries, this was measured by the amount of hot sauce people put in the food of others). This principle suggests that “terror management” can play a significant role for in-group favoritism and prejudice.

There is another psychological theory that helps explain our more aggressive world. 

Social identity theory offers a motivational explanation for in-group bias and Nations Divided

Social identity theory says that an individual’s self-concept comes, in part, from knowing that an individual is a member of a specific social group, along with the value and significance attached to that group.

Team identification is an extension of this. It’s defined as a fan’s psychological attachment to a team and the degree to which a fan views that team as an extension of their own self. That team could be the “Red” or “Blue” team, the "Left" vs "Right", pro-maskers vs anti-maskers, pro-democracy vs anti-democracy etc.

Social identity and team identification helps give someone a sense of belonging and this sense of belonging can be beneficial and protective. However, at times, depending on how invested or dependent we are on that identity and sense of belonging, whatever might challenge that, can be seen as disproportionately threatening - we’ve already unpacked a bit about what some people do in threatening, terror inducing situations.

2020 was an unprecedented year with unprecedented stress, people anxious and highly aroused, huge existential threat and the want/need to manage one’s terror is high, leading to a desire to find a group to belong to and adhere to that group... no matter what.

As we know and have seen in sports arenas all over the world, people can become aggressive, seemingly dis-proportionately angry and violent even, in response to a bad call being made, a team threatened with losing the “game” etc.

The level of identification with the team seems to play a decisive role. What gets people so angry, in psychological terms, is their ego defensiveness, or how anxious or sensitive they were to challenges and criticisms of their self-worth, as experienced through identification with their team i.e. social group. Therefore you are not just a threat to my team, but a threat to me, my identity, my values, meaning systems, beliefs etc.

We’re built to survive, our fear-arousal, fight/flight system is meant to protect us and yet can become overwhelmed and hijacked with very unfortunate outcomes as we have witnessed in recent times. This is especially true if we've been primed by the behaviors and messages of others who consistently model an ideology of hate, fear and aggression. Energy begets energy.

Aggression is often an attempt to gain power over fear and power over the people that triggered the fear.

Aggression doesn't equal strength, peace equals strength. 

Aggression is about fear, fear of losing, fear of loss, fear of harm, fear of overwhelm, fear of fear.

When you experience someone being aggressive (yourself included), perhaps the real question to ask is - "What are they/you afraid of"?

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Paul is an internationally awarded therapist, speaker and founder of the Life Recovery Program. Among the awards Paul received- "Best Innovator Award," "Outstanding Addictions Professional Award," "Outstanding Service and Contribution in the Field of Mental Health," in 2019 he was an award finalist for the GIDSS Foundation “International Peace Award”

His awarded online Inward Strong Program has helped organizations and thousands of individuals, and families successfully manage & monitor mental/behavioral health and other stress related issues. The program helps people and organizations, by taking the next step of getting support, getting better, more focused and becoming inward strong. "It's like having your own personal wellness coach 24/7"