Whatever you are doing is important

Whatever we do is based on our choice itself, universe supports both, living to the potential as well choosing to go with the circumstance. if you choose an ordinary life and give up to your circumstances, that's also our own choice, but if we decide to break barriers and choose to live up to our utmost potential, then the universe will surely support in that too. Please understand one thing. If you don't live this moment to the fullest, to the utmost happiness of yours, chances are more that you will never be happy.

Coming back to one's potential. You should always remember one thing. Only dead fish swim along the stream. As long as you enjoy pushing your capability to the fullest, you should keep doing it. A cardinal rule of life is that only person allowed to dictate the terms of your life is You, Only you. So it's up to you to push yourself to the fullest or live a mediocre life. If you ask me, I always set goals which I strongly feel non achievable and push towards it. That's the only thing keeps me going.

When you achieve your potential, when you scale new heights, you feel more alive or more content or more happy - all of these effects are desirable and hence, it's important to achieve your potential. Besides, when you achieve your potential, you become more valuable - not only to yourself but to people around you. So, not only do you benefit from your performance, so do others. So, it's quite important. I have learnt too many things only because this has been my turning point. It has been the worst year yet a very learning phase.

Past doesn’t matter. Let it go. I had anguish and anger for people who sexually assaulted me and scared me and I kept holding it. I had anger for those who took advantage of my innocence and helpful nature, and the anger had almost made me a person I never thought I would be. A worst phase was seen while I had severe panic disorders and anxiety issues, mostly because I gathered all my worst times and anguish at one moment. It made my life hell for four months. I am all good today. I have forgiven most of the people and let things go. I have implemented the above lesson and I am calm and serene.

You are only soul responsible person for your happiness. So, I am a hyper emotional and a hyper sensitive person. I get too much dependent for my happy life on others. I think less for myself when it comes to being happy. In such a world where people are too practical, it’s too hard to find a person who actually thinks and feels for you. After my serious break up, my family thought marriage would be a good thing for me. But will I be happy if I can’t really connect to a person and don’t live my dreams and fantasies?

May be I won’t find that person. If I won’t, I won’t clutch myself with anyone because for me happiness comes to you when you can deeply connect with a person. You just can’t make someone your mother and love her like your own. You know that your mother is not going to stop loving you. This is what you need in a soul partner which is kind of tough and needs patience. Compromise if you wish to see the other person happy but don’t let it be an exploitation. I have been a very cordial person and I didn’t take my ex’s possessiveness and jealousy seriously.

Every guy and every girl is a human being and have the tendency to be possessive. Respect that. Of course know the limit of possessiveness. Extra possessiveness is a kind of mistrust. I learnt to keep myself away from taking the silly meaningless flirting. For me they were compliments but for my ex it was something which led to big fights. I was wrong of course! Guys know more about guys and girls know more about girls psychology! Don’t let your career be dependent on anyone! Anyone means anyone! I chose to do PhD and stay put and happy in the most depressing city because my ex lived nearby. I tell you it has been a disaster since we broke up.

Don’t keep blaming yourself for everything. I kept blaming myself that I was responsible for this breakup which actually was too beautiful and I was over-confident that no matter what it’s not going to end. But I was wrong. And to make myself at ease and not hate him, I kept all the blames on myself. He said sorry on several occasions but I felt it was all my fault. I stopped blaming myself when I realized the truth and the series of events. I realized I gave my 200 percent and I wouldn’t have left the person I loved if he became mentally sick and retard for a while.

Be as you are. Don’t change yourself to an extent that your existence ceases. I was a jolly, funny, extrovert and too much of a chatter box. I could talk non stop. It made me a lively girl. I had cut off myself from everyone and I haven’t been on a trip for almost a year. I realize it was my worst mistake. This is the reason I couldn’t get over things quickly. Don’t give up when you feel low at points. I was all senseless what to do. I had to leave my PhD for four months. I was broke and dependent on my sister. I was all clueless what to do because returning to the place which is full of memories and no friends was tough. I felt like I failed completely. I felt like I was a loser. The efforts I had put to reach to this height all went in pain just because of one person. But then I realized I need to find reasons to live and not feel low just for one person since my mom and my sisters love me like hell!

Know your worth and learn about yourself. Keep yourself alone for a little while and do things which make you peaceful. Three months back I started writing and realized I could write. I never thought I could express things and write well. I still don’t believe I write good but people have appreciated me and I got a new thing in my life. If I hadn’t seen that phase, I wouldn’t have found out too many good things I am capable of, one being, giving life lessons..These are just few of it but very important because it’s a common thing these days. Mine was tough because of several other reasons. Love yourself and keep yourself happy no matter what! Cheers!