Whatever You Believe About Yourself Is Probably Wrong
I once took an intensive aptitude test that measured, among other things, whether I work best alone or with other people. Before sharing the results, the administrator asked me whether I wanted to guess the test result. It was easy: I work best alone
Wrong. The actual test revealed that I work best with other people. In fact, my results were off the charts in that other direction.
Think about it. On such a basic aspect of my personality and aptitudes, I was utterly wrong.
Before you start thinking that I am dumb and clueless, the odds are pretty high that you wouldn't do much better in proving the accuracy of your own self-awareness.
Human beings are extremely complicated.
We are doing our best. We are only human, and we make mistakes. We see the world through our own biases and preconceptions; that is not going to change.
What can change is whether we accept the fact that accurate self-awareness is like immaculate conception; it is nearly impossible to achieve.
For this reason, I am more willing than ever to step outside the boundaries I used to set for myself. Do I want to go see that French film "Les rencontres d'après minuit" about two poets who continually have a philosophical debate about love and desire? No! I mean... yes.
Do I want to go to the opera? No! I mean... yes.
Travel outside your country. Read books that argue a different perspective than your own. Volunteer on a farm or in an inner city. Attend lectures. Go to art shows and exhibitions that make you a bit uncomfortable.
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Most of all, stop pretending that you know what's best for you. The truth is, we don't.
To learn more...
"Unskilled and Unaware of It: How Difficulties in Recognizing One's Own Incompetence Lead to Inflated Self-Assessments" by Justin Kruger and David Dunning (1999). The authors found that people who performed poorly on a cognitive task tended to overestimate their own performance and abilities. They called this phenomenon the "Dunning-Kruger effect," and suggested that it arises from a lack of metacognitive ability, or the ability to reflect on one's own thinking and performance.
"Are You Aware of Your Self-Interest?" by George Loewenstein, Emily Haisley, and Rachel Moran (2010). The authors found that people often fail to recognize how their self-interest biases their own decision-making. They suggested that this failure arises from a lack of self-awareness about one's own motives and biases.
"The Blind Spot: An Essay on the Relation between Theory and Data in Cognitive Science" by T. Metzinger (2010). In this essay, the author argues that the human brain has a "phenomenal self-model" that allows us to be self-aware, but that this model is often incomplete and inaccurate. He suggests that our self-awareness is limited by our inability to access certain aspects of our own minds and brains, and that this limitation can lead to illusions of self-knowledge and self-understanding.
"The Paradox of Self-Awareness: Why Few Behave in Ways They Prefer" by David Dunning, Joyce Ehrlinger, and Justin Kruger (2008). People who claimed to value certain traits and behaviors often failed to exhibit those traits and behaviors in their actual choices and actions. The authors suggested that this paradox arises from a lack of self-awareness about one's own values and preferences.
"Introspection and Self-Insight: The Necessity of Dichotomizing and Combining Measures" by Emily Pronin, Daniel Lin, and Lee Ross (2002). In this study, the authors found that people's self-ratings of their own emotional states often did not match up with their actual physiological responses to emotional stimuli. They suggested that this discrepancy arises from a lack of self-awareness about one's own emotional states.
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Craft ManagementPractitioner in Massage for Autism, SEND and Mental Health.Qualified December 2023Reiki Master - Holistic management of Humans, Pets, and Farm animals.
1 年I am curious, where do all these psychosymetric tests come from? Who writes them, and how does A+B = C? Because its all very odd don't you think? How as you said yourself, you believed you are a loner, and the tests show you're not? Do you believe it to be true? Or, is it a case you are forced to believe it isn't because the test says so. We also don't know how those psycho tests are worked? Do they see you from someone else's perspective, or does it see you as yourself from your own perspective? Both can be drastically different, as you've found out. I think you have to look at the source, before you decide whether its right or wrong about your personality and before you go questioning it, be sound how you feel about yourself before you have a test tell you differently.
Independent Contractor
1 年Bruce, I really enjoyed this article! I found it to be very insightful and agree that what we think we want, may often be very different than what we actually need to thrive! Well done!
Student at Polytechnic University of the Philippines
1 年How would I describe a bookworm like U???? Everything you have cited are very informative & makes me ?? my self awareness & self interest in life. ?Not going too much beyond my limits. Self evaluation. You’re write up are very interesting.?
WorkSource (Workfirst) Pierce
1 年Very interesting article, thanks for sharing Bruce. Sometimes I am so unpredictable, and when i know it i ask apology to myself knowing that I can forgive myself when I do something wrong. reading your article, i almost thought i can be enlightened with all my wrong doings.