Whatever is Customary

I am qualified to talk about airline pilots. Twenty-nine years of watching them perform within a few inches of me under every kind of circumstance has shown me their inner strengths as well as their quirks.

Last summer, a medically enforced stay on my living room couch and two cable-conveyed movies led me to binge-watching aviation movies. "Island in the Sky" and "The High and the Mighty" were on my tube.

Today, both films are looked on as sort of a joke by the general public. A parody of "The High and the Mighty" called "Airplane!" has become more popular than the movie it goofed.

"Island in the Sky" is less well-known but shows airline pilots what they were and are more straightforward. There isn't a single airline pilot that I've known who hasn't shown at least a dozen traits demonstrated by the characters in this movie.?

John Wayne starred in both pictures. He has had a reputation over the years of not being such a good actor, but he nailed the attitude of a pilot in both flicks.?

Some Men Are Islands

Lost in an arctic wilderness with dwindling food, fuel, and hope after their cargo airplane crashed, Wayne's crew has to wait it out while their friends spend days and nights on long-range search missions.?

Two of the pilots looking for Wayne's crew have been copied at one time or another by every professional pilot I've ever known.?

One, a young co-pilot, spends most of the movie in the co-pilot seat napping. When awakened by whatever crisis has come up, he always answers with, "Whatever is customary." I have used that line dozens of times in flight.?

I can't remember how many times something like this has come up over my career:?

Flight Engineer: Hey, Captain, the auto pressurization just failed. Do you want me to try to control it on standby?

Me: Whatever is customary.

Another character, a captain named Moon, played by Andy Divine, is the kind of flier every potential captain wants to be. Relaxed -- almost comatose -- during every flight, his favorite line was, "Everybody relax now -- just take it easy!"?

He was so laid-back in the movie that he had a little metal wand and would pull out of his jacket to move switches on the overhead so he wouldn't have to exert himself too much.

I never flew with a guy with that kind of wand, but when I was an engineer, I flew with more than one captain who had a radio-antenna pointer he would tap various switches with to get me to move them. Other guys would be so lazy that they could move the OBS on their nav displays with their foot without moving their magazine or newspaper.?

I've heard his words from various captains, co-pilots, and even myself -- "Now, let's not get excited" --when we heard an unusual noise, smelled smoke, hit severe turbulence, or found ourselves sitting in a suddenly dark cockpit.?

Taking a deep breath and a little time before doing something fast and stupid is the hallmark of a good airline pilot.?

I have to admit that when it comes to coolness and calm, I wasn't half as good at it as most of my crewmates. I remember when I was a DC-8 flight engineer, and we had a homesick Cuban in the back saying he had a gun. When I was reporting the problem, my voice on the company radio most likely didn't have the deep timbre I would expect of a cool pilot.?

One captain I flew without of Chicago was so senior and laid-back some of our conversations as we taxied out when I flew co-pilot for him went like this:?

Him: Kevin, where are we going today??

Me: Boss, we go the inner, the wedge to the outer, then to two-seven right.?

Him: No, I mean, where the Hell are we going today??

Me: Oh, Fort Lauderdale!?

Him: OK, whatever is customary ...

Another great saying he gave me has never appeared in any movie but was great advice nonetheless. Once when I was flying co-pilot for him, the ride was much rougher than usual, and no matter how many altitudes and other strategies I tried, I couldn't find a smooth ride to save my behind.?

"Well," he said, "there is one true thing you can always say about turbulence ... It'll either get better, get worse, or stay about the same."?

A Heart of Steel

One of the reasons people think that pilots tend to be self-centered is because we are. Scratch an excellent professional pilot, and you'll uncover a person that has more than a bit of faith in their abilities and skills.?

Professionally, these skills are, from time to time, called upon to save the lives of hundreds of people.

Misjudge that quarterly report as a CPA, and you are in big trouble. Misjudge that level five thunderstorm as a captain, and you and your people are dead.?

Pilots face a problem when it comes to dismissing the notion that they are jerks: When dealing with non-flying people, there is no common reference frame for them to use to communicate.?

For example, one of the most commonly asked questions I've gotten over the years from non-flying people is, "So, when was a time you were most scared in an airplane?" Another one I got recently was, "Have you ever crashed and killed anybody?"?

The first question is merely foolish and common. The second one made me want to punch the guy. I've been lucky enough not to have ever hurt anyone with an airplane, but imagine a person wanting to be entertained by a story where someone got hurt or killed.?

Both questions are stupid and out of touch with reality because of something fundamental about pilots that the general public doesn't know: Pilots aren't scared of dying. They are afraid of messing up. It is OK to die in a crash if you've done everything right. If you screw it up and crash, killing your people, there is nothing worse.?

Or, in the words of another airline pilot, I've idolized over the years: "It is better to die than to look bad."?

Some Are Not So Mighty

The only movie I've ever seen that addressed pilot fear properly was "The High and the Mighty." Most co-pilots gleefully remember that one as the movie where the first officer, played by John Wayne, gets to slap the living bejeezus out of the captain, whom Robert Stack plays.?

The "High and the Mighty" probably isn't the best film to show crew resource management or human factors techniques, but it did clearly show the CRM concept of "narrow focus." The captain in the movie was so focused on ditching he refused to consider other alternatives or input from his crew.?

In their engine-out emergency, Stack froze up and was more than a little uptight but regained his composure, thanks to a bit of slapping around by the Duke, just in time to save everyone. The story highlighted those nagging little fears that only a captain can have halfway over an ocean. Trust me, I've heard more noises over 30W in a 777 and had more doubts about sustained, single-engine flight over water than I'd ever care to admit. It was odd that when I did have an engine failure over the ocean, the two hours on a single-engine to an emergency landing in Keflavik, Iceland was no stress.?

The first time John Wayne hears and feels a weird vibration early in the flight is the most telling part of the story in the movie. Airline pilots have all been there a thousand times, and it almost always turns out to be nothing. Almost.

Both movies were based on books by the great Ernest K. Gann. He was an experienced airline pilot from the old days who went on to a great Hollywood career and a quiet retirement in the Pacific Northwest that ended with his death at the young age of 81.?

My only personal brush with Gann was a short phone conversation we had years ago when he had the foresight and the grace to turn down a request from me for a magazine interview. His career was over, he said. He just wanted to be left alone.?

That was the coolest thing he could have said.