What If You're WORD-less?

I gotta come clean. For the first time in a decade, it’s January and I don’t have a Word. So I’m not able to do my One Word Process I created to tame my?out-of-control, overstretched, over-scheduled life. (If you want more info, it’s in my 2nd book.) Midway through last year, my year of LOVE, I had to shift my Priorities, and downshift some Goals, and completely abandon a whole lot of others. Because when one of our kids are struggling, it’s all-consuming, at least it was for me.?Once I recalibrated my expectations of myself, I still served some Priorities but with different goals. I can’t imagine what an even bigger shitshow it would’ve been if I hadn’t had all these tools, hadn’t done all this work all these years. A lot of you might think you’re doing personal development work because you want changes now, and that’s true. But it’s also investments that you make so that you can live off the earnings when you need to, when things that you never expect actually happen and you’ve got to be stronger than you ever thought possible.

I’m not sure what I want, and I haven’t had the mental energy to put any time into figuring it out.?I don’t have the mental energy to figure it out and go through my beloved process.?If you don’t have yours either, don’t beat yourself up. It just means you need to take time to figure it out. I’m taking serious time later this month, and I promise to share about it.

So I did a different exercise that you can do, whether you’ve got your Word or not: What Words we refuse to live by this year. Mine are

EXCUSES: Every day we serve our Priorities and Goals or make excuses. Last year when some shit hit the fan, I started making excuses. Thankfully I told myself what I’ve written and coached: Instead of saying I don’t have time, say it’s not a Priority. I got real about what my new Priorities were, and I was able to pivot. If you’re making excuses, be honest to stop feeling like a failure or a fraud.

AVOIDANCE: I can’t help but think some of the tough stuff of last year wouldn’t have been as bad if I hadn’t been trying to avoid things that were painful. Whether we’re consciously or unconsciously procrastinating or overthinking to avoid facing things that are uncomfortable, it continues to exacerbate stress and anxiety. Figure out what you’re avoiding and face it all.

DOUBT: I doubt all the things: am I a good enough parent or entrepreneur or coach, will a new project I’m noodling be successful because there’s already so much noise out there and who the hell wants to listen to me, on and on.?If you have doubts, recognize it's fear talking. I always say about fear that it's our job to act in spite of it. Our fears are often a bullshit story we’ve made up, or a worst-case scenario that’s unlikely to happen. Even if it did, we'd be OK. Focus on what you know to be true and move forward.

Who knows what this year is going to hold, so let’s focus on the things we can control: What we think, what actions we take, the light we put out in the world and how we treat each other. And about that Word, put in the time for quiet, for thinking, for being. And you'll find it, or it will find you.