What will your tombstone text be like?
Amaro Araujo
International Sales & Negotiation expert | Speak 6 languages | Published author | Multicultural minded
? This week's card is about the uncomfortable situation of imagining or visualizing what will be written in our monument. It should generally sum up our legacy to this world in terms of character and example. What would people say about you when you depart? What will remain in them (and not for them)?
Bear with me for a minute. Let′s make a balance. Who we are, our actions, character, and deeds for what will we be remembered: loving to all? Cordial? Available? Supportive? Friendly? Peaceful? Or never present, busy, grumpy, complicated, heavy, demanding, non-emotional?
Mind you; we tend to be biased, minimize our flaws, and extrapolate our qualities. So do that review again, as neutral as possible and accordingly not to what you'd like people to feel and say, but to what they actually could feel or write on our tombstone. There can be a big difference. And no worries if you have wrongdoings you feel ashamed of or have amendments to do, but do them while you still have time.
What would you imagine people gossiping or chattering during your funeral?
? I once read a statement that sank deep into my mind regarding this topic. During a funeral, two friends chatted about a colleague's death. Aside from the sadness and grief, all they could say about the departed colleague was, "this was a man without stories. Never any issues, disputes or whatsoever." That isn't very reassuring. Can you imagine that was all? That was their most significant memory? Was this the peak of life, "a man without stories"? It meant a dull, monotonous life. A man living day in and day out somewhat similar with no excitement, no getting out of his comfort zone, no taste of all the flavors and all that life has to offer.
? Many people go through life hoping they make it until retirement. "One day, when I retire, that will be my goal; that's when I'll start living on my terms and doing what I want." They forget, though, that when that day arrives, they will a) be older with less energy and vitality, b) have more diseases and health problems, c) have physical limitations or at least lower physical capacity, d) have less money e) Most likely less willing to explore new things. Think twice about what you're postponing for "when I retire." As Warren Buffet said, I wouldn't recommend postponing sex for when you retire (just to put the topic on very pragmatic terms).
? Will your tombstone words be about your titles and diplomas? your achievements and successes? your job titles or businesses? Your cars, houses or possessions?
? I genuinely hope you live long and still have a lot of time in case you want to make amends, change course, and self-actualize yourself. Just take a few minutes to shut yourself from the world, be brutally honest with yourself and make a balance of your life. This is a very liberating exercise that brings us back down to earth. You can't undone what you have done and who you have been. But you can change what you'll do tomorrow and shape who are you becoming.