What is your optimal?

Achieving a peak performance is nice, really nice. When you've practiced or worked on something challenging for a long time, and at the right moment you are not distracted, totally in the moment, and you execute it like it is no big deal, you really nail it; that feels like magic right? We call that flow. We all want that. The problem is we can’t count on that state of flow. To get the most out of ourselves, in a sustainable way, we’d better go for an optimal state of a lot more consistent, satisfying days of conscious behavior and a positive mood. And then, reaching that flow state every once in a while, will come as a byproduct.

That’s not only my own experience (and observation of other people), there is also overwhelming scientific evidence. Daniel Goleman , who made Emotional Intelligence (EI) famous, and Cary Cherniss , collected decades of research (including their own) that shows how being emotionally intelligent (cultivating (self-) awareness, empathy, and “soft” skills like really listening to other people etc.) can help us simply have more great, productive days and consistent growth. I would strongly recommend every leader, HR professional (and individual interested in a more purposeful, productive and happy life) to read their new book Optimal. In this newsletter I already share my highlights of the rich content of their book with you. It will directly help you as a leader, professional, parent or athlete, to live to your true potential, make your team and organization more productive, engaged, creative, flexible and humane. And we need all these competencies in our challenging times, that’s for sure. ?If this is not the first time you read or see something from me, you'll notice a lot of overlap with my usual subjects, it is very much aligned with the optimal I work with in my coaching and training, for instance in the framework of the 5 elements of optimal personal leadership, the conscious way ?. That's why I am so grateful for the decades of hard work by these scientists.

The greater importance of EI is a paradigm shift. We were raised with the idea that our IQ would determine our success in life. IQ was even crucial for our collective success as humanity. And to an extend, it is an important fundament; on school it determines to a large degree if we get good grades. But on the work floor, as a leader, as a high performing team or organization, the EI gets more and more important. Also to distinguish yourself. And to get in optimal state.

How do you get in that optimal state then? Well, in general by doing what a loving and wise grandmother would tell her grandchildren: be kind, pay attention, really listen to other people, connect with other people, be happy and (self-) compassionate. Here are some more takeaways of the research in the book:

-??????? The ability to tune in to what is happening in the moment is like the doorway into the optimal state, or “neural harmony” as scientists call it.

-??????? That requires self-awareness, emotional self-regulation,?“meta- awareness”.

-??????? We tend to think we are more self- aware than we actually are.

-??????? We can train our attention, our mindfulness. Benefits: we become more calm, concentrated, and learn, multitask and think better.

-??????? Mindset matters. We can learn to have a growth instead of a fixed mindset. We can really grow and develop.

-??????? We tend to think that we believe in our own growth, more than we actually do.

-??????? When we are in tune with our emotions, triggers and how they influence our thoughts and actions, we are more ready for the challenges of daily life.

-??????? When we are happy and we feel good, we are more likely to take action on big things (like climate change).

-??????? Emotions are contagious. Especially the emotions of the leader in the room.

-??????? When it comes to avoiding burnout, it matters more that you have a good relationship with your boss, than that you work on your perfectionism (the more common assumption).

-??????? Learning to talk about emotions, also with colleagues, gives you a lot less stress.

-??????? Also research with successful teams at Google showed that the number one success factor was not the accumulated IQ but the psychological safety within the team. Feeling safe to be and express yourself and to take risks.

-??????? No matter how high our own self-esteem, in groups/teams we need signals from others that we belong.

-??????? The last one, a really positive one: unlike IQ, EI can improve when you get older. It’s trainable, coachable, you can make small steps yourself, every day and embody the growth mindset.

How great that simply knowing and being ourselves, paying attention to what happens in the moment, caring about other people and being kind and compassionate actually are the superpowers in our age and for you on the work floor.

I wish you all the best discovering your own Optimal.

Interested in how Development is Qi can help you and your organization with the coaching and training? Send a dm, look at www.developmentisqi.com, or send an email to [email protected]. On the website you can also find practical resources to help you and your team on these subjects.

Guido Deuzeman is a former advisor to CEO's and national political leaders in the Netherlands, now coach and trainer. Working from Portugal, online and live with an international clientèle.