What if your greatest challenge is your greatest gift?
Matthew Fox
Tech Leadership Coach | Helping disillusioned Snr/Exec tech leaders reignite their career with unstoppable confidence, effortless presence and a ton more resilience and joy.
Mother’s Day was a challenge this year. My eldest son has been struggling with some big emotions and on the day, our best laid plans lay tattered on the floor.
There were tears, sadness, dismay, frustration (and I’m not saying from whom!)
I felt bad for my wife, concerned for my sons and I’ll admit it, feeling somewhat responsible for taking care that everything and everyone was ok.
That’s a lot of responsibility!
There were many times when I would have shared this story as a ‘disaster.’ That we had had such a bad day and things were so challenging.
However, I’m seeing that these events in life are bringing me a massive learning and growth opportunity.
Sometimes I’ve felt rejected when my partner seems to focus on what’s difficult rather than what I perceive I’ve contributed to making the day special.
Sometimes, I’ve felt triggered when my son’s best way of coping with his distress is to scream at the top of his voice, hit or throw things.
Sometimes, I’ve felt ashamed by my reactivity and resistance when things seem to be going very differently from how I want them to.
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So where’s the growth opportunity in all this?
Right now, I can see that life is offering me the opportunity to allow everything in my experience without judgement or the need to add story to it.
At its most simple, being with what is, knowing (and learning to experience) that I can be absolutely rocksteady in the storm, however foul the weather seems to be.
I’m not saying it’s (I'm) perfect, but it’s opening a door to more peace and wellbeing in the moment.
As always, what I’m sharing here would also apply to any work situation. If you feel triggered by a boss or colleague, de-railed by office politics, overwhelmed with demands on you…
Whether at work or at home, when you feel ruffled or riled is an opportunity to ask yourself:
What am I being called to learn about myself here?
What would change if I dropped any and all stories I have about this situation?
How would I show up differently for this situation if I was free from my story about it?