What is Your Compass? Navigating Life with Authenticity.
Hellen M. Ndirangu
Goal Strategist | Growth Accelerator | Personal Growth Architect & Productivity Coach | Empowering great people to turn their goals into reality and move from overwhelmed to efficient with purpose for sculpted success.
Are you sailing through life with someone else's map?
It's easy to get swept up in the current of others' expectations and dreams. We're bombarded with images of "success" on social media, pressured by societal norms, and often find ourselves chasing goals that don't truly resonate with our hearts. But here's a thought-provoking quote to consider:
"Most people don't know why they're doing what they're doing. They imitate others, go with the flow, and follow paths without making their own. They spend decades in pursuit of something that someone convinced them they should want, without realizing that it won't make them happy." - Derek Sivers
Ouch. This quote hits home, doesn't it? How many of us are chasing dreams that feel more like hand-me-downs than tailor-made aspirations?
Fear not, it’s never too late to recalibrate your personal compass and chart a course that's uniquely yours. Here are some strategic tips to help you find your true north:
Excavate Your Childhood Dreams
Remember when you wanted to be an astronaut-doctor-veterinarian-musician? While that exact combination might be tricky to pull off, there's wisdom in those early aspirations. What excited you before the world told you to "be realistic"?
Action step: Spend 15 minutes journaling about your childhood dreams. What elements still resonate with you today?
Conduct a Values Audit
Your values are the bedrock of your authentic self. What truly matters to you? Is it creativity, freedom, security, or perhaps making a difference? Knowing your core values helps point you in the right direction. When your actions align with your values, you feel fulfilled. When they don't, you feel off-kilter.
Action step: List your top 5 values. Now, examine how your current life and goals align with these values. Any mismatches?
Embrace the "Anti-Goal"
Sometimes, it's easier to identify what you don't want than what you do. That's valuable information!
Action step: Write down your "anti-goals." What kind of life do you absolutely not want to live? Now, flip those to identify what you do want.
Practice the Art of Micro-Experiments
You don't have to make drastic life changes overnight. Think of yourself as a scientist, conducting small experiments to test what truly makes you tick.
Action step: Choose one small way to incorporate more authenticity into your life this week. Maybe it's taking a dance class you've always been curious about or having that difficult conversation you've been avoiding.
Curate Your Influences
We are the average of the five people we spend the most time with, as the saying goes. This applies to our digital lives too.
Action step: Audit your social media. Unfollow accounts that make you feel inadequate or push you towards inauthentic goals. Follow people who inspire you to be more genuinely yourself.
Embrace the Awkward Middle
Changing course can feel uncomfortable. You might face resistance from others or self-doubt. It can be confusing, hard and unclear at the beginning, messy in the middle and clear at the finish line. Remember, growth often feels awkward before it feels amazing.
Action step: Write a letter of encouragement to your future self, acknowledging the challenges of change and cheering yourself on.
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Pause and Reflect: When was the last time you asked yourself, "Why am I doing this?" If your answer sounds suspiciously like, "Because that's what you're supposed to do," it might be time for a compass check.
Embrace Your Quirks: Remember that weird hobby you loved as a kid but dropped because it wasn't "cool"? It might be time for a reunion. Our unique interests often hold clues to our authentic path.
Beware of the Highlight Reel: social media is the showreel of life, not the behind-the-scenes. Don't compare your bloopers to someone else's carefully curated clips.
Practice Saying No: Every 'yes' to someone else's dream is potentially a 'no' to your own. It's okay to politely decline invitations that don't align with your direction.
Set Personal Goals: Instead of chasing society's definition of success, define what success means to you. It could be financial freedom, creative satisfaction, or making a positive impact on the community.
Seek Inspiration, Not Imitation: It’s great to look up to successful people, but use their stories as inspiration rather than a blueprint. Your journey is unique, and your path will be too.
Embrace Failure: Understand that failure is not the opposite of success; it’s part of the journey. Each setback is an opportunity to learn and recalibrate your compass.
Surround Yourself with Support: Build a network of mentors, peers, and friends who encourage you to pursue your authentic path. Their support can provide guidance and keep you motivated.
Listen to Your Intuition: Your gut feeling often knows more than you think. When making decisions, listen to that inner voice. It’s your subconscious trying to guide you towards your true path.
Avoid Comparison: The comparison game is a trap. It’s like comparing apples to oranges. Everyone’s journey is different, and what works for someone else might not work for you. Focus on your path and progress.
Be Open to Change: Life is dynamic, and so is your compass. It’s okay to change direction if your current path doesn’t feel right anymore. Flexibility can lead you to new and fulfilling opportunities.
Special Calibration for Your Compass:
The "Deathbed Test": Imagine yourself at 90, looking back on your life. What would you regret not doing? This sobering thought experiment can quickly separate the truly important from the noise.
The Joy Meter: Pay attention to what lights you up. When do you lose track of time? When do you feel most alive? These are powerful clues to your authentic path.
The "Absolute Yes" or "No" Principle: If it's not an "Absolute Yes!", it's a "No." This simple filter can help you stay true to your path and avoid getting sidetracked.
The Curiosity Trail: Follow your curiosity. It's nature's built-in compass for personal growth and fulfillment.
So, the next time someone asks, "Where do you see yourself in five years?" resist the urge to recite the standard script. Instead, smile mysteriously and say, "I'm not sure, but I know it'll be authentically me."
Your life is not a multiple-choice test where you have to pick from pre-determined options. It's more like a blank canvas, waiting for you to create your unique masterpiece.
So, what will you paint?
Your compass is unique to you. It’s shaped by your passions, values, and dreams. Don’t let societal pressures or the expectations of others dictate your path. Your compass might not always point to the easiest path, but it will lead you to a life filled with purpose and fulfillment.
So, what is your compass pointing to?
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