Life is Unpredictable. It's an era demanding the transformation of one's Self to enact Compassion and Courage.

Life IS Unpredictable.

It always has been, always will be..

Two day's ago a friend sadly and unexpectedly passed away. As hard as it hit us, it bears nothing on what his family will be going through.

I'm reminded of times, when confronted with unpredictability it takes everything we've got to look find strength, resilience, compassion and courage...

Like in 2014 when one of my colleagues, a friend died from suicide and on that same day my husband broke down from his business going into administration, and we were to celebrate my son's 7th birthday #WTF

Like in 2012 when returning to work after my third child in three years, I got resentful and bitter about not being able to return to a job I loved and worked so hard for.

Like in 2005 when after 6 years of dating and being absolutely certain that "all men are a-holes" my (now) husband, surprised me the proposal of a life-time and some 15 years later I find myself the mother of three children. (yes, you should know this was about as frightening a moment for me than any others)

Like in 1985 when 12 yo I found myself alone and afraid, not wanting to call my mother for fear of being in trouble for hanging out with a bunch of older kids and pretending to be cool, only to finding myself in (let's say) a whole lot of trouble with a 21yo young man.

It's in these life defining moments, we recognise how precious life really is and how little we live our life as if, this really is it.

Really. Let's be frank - as you all know me to be - despite knowing that life is precious, we're all guilty of living our life as if “tomorrow I will wake up and do those things and be that person I want to be"; until one-day, life smacks us in the face and we get knocked down so hard, we find it hard to recover... little by little, those defining moments, suppress us from living the life we desire and deserve.

Why? Because instead of having the courage to life into our hands and disrupt all those little (and big things) we know don't work, or we know we don't like; we tolerate it - until the status quo disrupts us.

Losing a loved one is a precious reminder that we have absolutely no control over anything! This business of control and certainty is nothing but an illusion.

We look at life, above the above the water, pretending its all good.

But life really is unpredictable and uncertain - it always has been and always will be.

We put off reconciling with family because we want to hold onto grievances,...

We stick it out in jobs we hate because it pays the bills...

We tolerate loveless relationships because we fear it's as good as it gets...

We put off our hopes, dreams and aspirations because it really occurs like its just too hard...

BUT.. and there's always a but..

I know it sounds cliche, but this really is it. LIFE is not a dress rehearsal.

This is life.

There is no tomorrow, one-day, or some-day when it comes to living with joy, freedom, passion, purpose, love, fulfilment, courage and compassion.

Tomorrow is nothing but an illusion.

Certainty and control is an illusion.

There is only ever now, and now, and now.

That's not to say we shouldn't do away with the thinking and planning, to map out what the best course of action is required to achieve our goals or live our life consistent with who we say we are or what we say we want...

Many of us are still living in denial of what’s happening and how were living our life - not truely realising our own strength, resilience and courage..

Not being in action creating a life they we really want and deserve...

Sacrificing real love, connections or a career we truely desire...

As humans, we really are great at showing up - at work or in life - pretending it's all rosy and "happy-happy" but we only need to dig around to find that most people are really f*cking miserable, disconnected from their true purpose in life.

Instead they choose a life of survival, explaining life away as if they / we have no control, resigned that we simply are left with no other option than to "suck it up", get drunk and switch off on social media to avoid having to confront how f*cking miserable we really are.

We are really great at tolerating a massive amount of unworkability in our lives, in our relationships, at home and at work, sticking around in jobs we hate, careers we resent and putting off taking any action because we simply fear what others will think, say or do.

Instead, we put on a brave face, smile, talk about being more "happy" and "positive" and "optimistic", but there is no escaping what's going on underneath..

No-one is immune to the challenges of life... worse case - sexual abuse, suicide, cancer, domestic violence, emotional, physical or alcohol abuse, drug, alcohol, food or sex addictions ...

Imagine ..

• In a room of 100 people, 20 of them will have been sexually abused (and that's only based on those who report it)
• Male suicide continues to be a major social issue for men and boys of all ages in Australia and remains the biggest single killer of men aged 15-44.
• Untreated mental health is costing Australian workplaces $10.9 billion per year - $4.7m in absenteeism, $6.1bn in presenteeism and $164m in compensation.
• Autoimmune (stress-related) disease is now the 10th leading cause of death for all women.

And yet. We read these stats like, "that will never happen to me".

Really?

Its time we all realised that each and everyone of, with our miserable underlying resentments and resignation, to ignite a change in who we are, to recognise that it takes each and everyone of us to do the work, from within, to create a life that allows for compassion, courage and connection.

It all starts here, with us.

We must be willing to let go of all the blame - its easy to blame the government, our partners, the kids, the systems, gender - blah blah blah...

But all that is just another illusion, preventing us from realising that WE are the source of our own life; and only we, can do something about it - what's happening around us, has nothing to do with how do life... and again, as cliche as it sounds, it really is how we choose to react to what's happening that determines life, our life.

So let us begin.

Change starts here, with compassion for ourself. It starts with a willingness to be brave, to love deeply and show our love for those around us... but it must start with a profound love and appreciation for self.

As someone who's seen the devastating impact of how we're living our life, both personally and in our relationship with others, I've discovered and know what it takes to do the work, to let go of resentment, anger and resignation, to take responsibility for the judgment I have laid on myself, on others, on the world around me.

I too am human. We are perfect with our imperfections and we are one in the same.

From personal experience, I can assure you with absolute certainty "YOUR STORY really does MATTER" - what you say to yourself about yourself; what you say to yourself about othres what you say to yourself about life and the world around you - it really does matter!

Life's too short to not have and live the life you want - and truly deserve.

It does NOT happen over-night.

There is no-such thing as overnight success.

There are, however, a few simple practices to get started on the journey, "a thousand mile journey starts with one simple step".

1. Practice Compassion towards yourself "for everyone is fighting a battle we know nothing about". If we want others to be kind, then we must start with ourselves. Kindness includes letting go of the harsh stories we tell ourselves about ourselves, others and the world.
2. Practice Forgiveness - making judgements about what we did or didn't do, or who we should or shouldn't be is a recipe for disaster. We are always winning the game we're playing at the time, we all make mistakes and we all do the best with what we know at the time.
3. Practice Acknowledgement - be willing to be open and honest with yourself by acknowledging what is present with how you feel and what you truly think. Our thoughts are a valid test for the truth. When we have the courage to acknowledge how we feel and the thoughts that are holding us back, we have a fresh place to start.
4. Practice Taking Action - just one small action, one action that aligns with what you know to do despite how you feel or what you believe may or may not happen We can never predict what comes from being in action and taking action is the only way to discover how brave and strong we really are.

If you're reading this, this really is your moment to thrive.

Let go of whatever "story" you have about yourself, others or life and give it a go.

Try out these practices and share in the comments or send me an email with what you discover. I guarantee you, its not easy but it is simple and you can do it - there's a much bigger life for you to be creating - in your family, career, business or entrepreneurial paths.

In the meantime, I got you!

Kylee - The Uncharted Leader