What Are You Paying Attention To?

Do you know the most important lesson I've learned from researching, writing and speaking on the topic of attention for thirty years?

We can't control the thoughts that come into our head, we can control how long they stay there.

We decide what we dwell on.

Do you know how the word dwell is defined? "To think, speak, or write at length about a particular subject, especially one that is a source of unhappiness, anxiety, or dissatisfaction.

What are you dwelling on these days?

There's a lot to worry about. However worrying serves no good purpose. It is a misallocation of our time and attention.

From the beginning of recorded human history, our greatest philosophers agree.

What we think about, we become.

As The Buddha said, "With our thoughts, we make the world."

What world are you making for yourself?

Are you focusing on what contributes to your quality of life or what compromises it?

This two minute exercise can help you pay attention to what's right in the world instead of what's wrong.

Sam Horn's Sixty Second "Pay Attention!" Exercise

1. Stop what you’re doing right now. Put down anything that's in your hands. 

2. Select someone or something in your area. (If this would make a person uncomfortable, select an object, e.g., a favorite photo, flower, cup of tea, the view out your window.)

3. Give that person or object 60 seconds of your undivided attention. Study them with awe and wonder. See them with fresh eyes, as if for the first or last time.

As soon as you do, you will find yourself really appreciating that person, marveling at the that flower, savoring that tea. You'll feel more present, connected, engaged.

Gratitude - which is the highest form of thought - is a moment’s notice away.

And the good new is, we can be more grateful anytime we want.

If you find yourself mentally doom-scrolling or going down the slippery slope of depressing thoughts, give your eyes to someone or something that fills your soul and lifts your spirits.

In that way, you are choosing your thoughts and making your world.

Here are a few favorite quotes on how to pay attention to what will matter in the long run. You might want to print and post these where you’ll see them throughout day so they stay in sight, in mind. Next time you're feeling a little down or world events hijack your attention, re-read them so you see and imprint the blessings all around you, right here, right now.

Inspiring Quotes for Paying Attention to What Will Matter In the Long Run

1. "You can become blind by seeing each day as a similar one." - Paulo Coelho

2. "If you're thankful for what you have, you'll always have enough. If you concentrate on what you don't have. you will never, ever have enough" - Oprah

3. "The moment one gives close attention to anything, even a blade of grass, it becomes a mysterious, awesome, indescribably magnificent world in itself." - Henry Miller

4. "To affect the quality of the day, that is the art of life." - Henry David Thoreau

5. “Don’t tell it like it is. Tell it like you want it to be.” -Esther Hicks

6. "Drink your tea slowly and reverently, as if it is the axis on which the world earth revolves – slowly, evenly, without rushing toward the future; live the actual moment. Only this moment is life.” - Thich Nhat Hanh

7. "If you're thankful for what you have, you'll always have enough. If you concentrate on what you don't have. you will never, ever have enough" - Oprah

8. "Enjoy the little things, for one day you will look back and realize they were the big things." - Robert Brault

9. "Nobody sees a flower really; it is so small. We haven't time, and to see takes time." - Georgia O'Keefe

10. “In today’s rush, we all think too much — seek too much — want too much — and forget about the joy of just being.” - Eckhart Tolle

11. "Reality is wrong. Dreams are real." - Tupak Shakur

12. "Life consists of what a man is thinking all day long." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

13. "Each morning we are born again. What we do today is what matters most.” - Buddha

14. "If you concentrate on finding whatever is good in every situation, you will discover that your life will suddenly be filled with feelings that nurture the soul.” - Rabbi Harold Kushner

15. "What a wonderful life I've led. I only wish I'd realized it sooner." - Collette

16. “When the eye wakes up to see again, it suddenly stops taking anything for granted.” – Frederick Franck

17. "We can only be said to be alive in those moments when our hearts are conscious of our treasures." - Thornton Wilder

18. "You are the sky. Everything else is just the weather." - Pema Chodron

19. "Gratitude is happiness doubled by wonder." - G. K. Chesterton

20. "The whole of life lies in the verb SEEING." - Teilhard de Chardin

Every time I see de Chardin's quote, something deep within me says, “Yes, yes, yes.” Really seeing the wonders around us is the first step to being IN our life and experiencing it with more appreciative awareness.

It's a head start to reveling in our days rather than rushing through them and looking back with regrets, wondering where they went and what happened.

Remember, you can be more mindful anytime you want. As Pema Chodron pointed out, you can BE the sky and create your own weather.

If you start dwelling on what's wrong, look around you and focus on what's right.

If you start feeling blue; switch your attention to something around you that's beautiful.

You have the freedom, autonomy and choice to revel in what's right - right in front of you - anytime, anywhere. Like right NOW.

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Sam Horn, CEO of the Intrigue Agency, is on a mission to help people create the life, work and relationships of their dreams. Her TEDx talk and work have been featured in New York Times, on NPR, and taught to Cisco, Intel, Capital One, Nationwide, YPO, and National Geographic. This is excerpted from her new book SOMEDAY is Not a Day in the Week.