WHAT YOU CAN CONTROL: TIPS FOR DEALING WITH UNCERTAINTY - PART 4

In recent posts related to uncertainty, we discussed key questions to think about, what I thought would be tips from Supreme Court Justice, Ruth Bader Ginsburg, and a strategy to shift from focusing on “What if?” to “What is.”

Today, I want to share how you can reframe your situation to focus on what you can control. This pandemic has many moving parts that are out of our control - when and how restrictions will continue to be lifted, when and if gatherings will be permitted, or when and how we will be asked to head back to the office or our kids to school. This situation can make you feel powerless and unable to effect change.

There are, however, things you can control. When you feel a sense of self-efficacy, the ability to make a difference in the outcome, it helps you make progress and move forward.

Some things to consider:

STAY INFORMED

There is a lot that is still unknown about COVID-19 and there is also some good, practical information to help inform your decisions. I found this article particularly helpful in figuring out what I am and am not comfortable doing (regardless of what is allowed.)

It is important to remember that there are conflicting priorities at play. Some are focused on getting the economy back on track. Others are committed to preventing the spread of the virus. Those in the middle might be willing to accept that the virus will spread but the curve will stay flattened if we slowly start to come out of quarantine. These are broad brush strokes that have personal consequences. What is most important to you and your family?

IDENTIFY YOUR PERSONAL RISK TOLERANCE

As outdoor seating at restaurants is permitted along with non-essential opening of stores and even movie theaters, you will need to assess your personal risk tolerance. Everyone has a version of social distancing that they find acceptable and this is not consistent across communities…or even within families.

I have found myself in situations where I thought the distancing would be acceptable…and then it wasn’t. This has made me revise what I am comfortable doing moving forward. I am grateful to have a choice.

For those who are being asked to go back to an office or send your kids to school, what are your options? Will what is being asked of you exceed the risk you are comfortable taking? Who might you speak with about an alternative?

TRY NOT TO JUDGE

To be honest - this is a message to myself. It is hard (and scary) when my young adult children make decisions that work for them yet make me feel like they are taking unnecessary risks. [This is probably true even when we are not living in a pandemic.] I need to remind myself that what works for me may be too relaxed or too strict for others.

All that I can control is what I am comfortable doing and it is my choice as to whether or not I am open to taking certain risks. For example, restaurants in my town have outdoor service available and the hair salons are open for business. For the moment, these are risks I’m not comfortable taking. Thankfully, my hair stylist was willing to come to my home and give me a much-needed haircut in my backyard! For those who are comfortable doing more, I am hopeful that they are doing so taking the necessary precautions for everyone’s safety.

What has worked for you? How have you been able to manage your actions and risk tolerance in these challenging times?