What Would I Say to the 18 Year Old Me?

Well.... This is interesting! When this question was posed by my friend and mentor, Author and Public Speaker Cheryl Chapman, I thought to myself "here we go, another soul searching moment coming up in the quest for personal growth and fulfilment"

Will I be catapulted back to a time of angst, insecurity, indecision,and financial difficulties? Will I find myself giving the teenage me a bit of a talking too? A shoulder to cry on? An encouraging hug? 

Hell no!! (Sorry, bit American) 

At eighteen, I felt free, totally free. I had just started a music degree at the University of East Anglia, I was studying, singing, and playing music, acting the the drama society plays, living in halls, meeting new people, and drinking too much Guinness !! I had a full grant (showing my age), and a well paid job at the weekends, so I don't recall ever having to worry about money. I had my first REAL date; I was asked out to dinner at Tatlers Restaurant in Pottergate, Norwich, and fell in love with Cote du Rhone! Oh and the young man who I dated for a year or so, Douglas, who played the cello and fretless bass guitar and looked a bit like Brian Cox - the scientist off the telly. 

I was virtually at the other end of the country from my parents, having been brought up in Devon, and was relieved to be away from my grumpy, controlling Dad, who made our home-life one of uncertainty and anxiety because of his changing moods. I was the first of over 60 cousins to go to university, but what seemed alien to my family, just seemed like a normal and natural path for me. 

I wore ponchos, sandals, Laura Ashley clothes, and drank Earl Grey tea (my Mum used to get the two mixed up), shopped for local produce on Norwich Market, and owned my first EVER bicycle, which I called Beryl. (Norwich is flatter than Devon). 

So is here anything I would say to the young Miss Wells? Yes phone your Mum!! At least every week! 

Sadly, although I escaped from the oppressive household, my Mum chose not to. In the end, in fact within just 10 years, she died due to the depression and illnesses she had suffered as a result of years of stress, at only 56 years old. My drive and purpose now is to do all I can to reduce my own risks of suffering a similar early death; (I am so like my mum) by changing the career path that was the source of my stress, learning to nourish my heart, with good habits, good people and a passion for saving lives from heart disease with the Miracle Molecule. 

When I felt the acute loss of my eldest daughter leave home when she was 18, (I was a complete wreck for weeks!!) I finally understood the pain my lovely Mum must have gone through as I waltzed off into my new life at the same age. I rang home once a week - well in the early days, and sent the occasional letter. 

Each successive child leaving home has got easier.... 

And now, my youngest daughter is at university in Durham, where she is studying English (and partying). She a member of the Ultimate Frisby society, the Pool society and the Scottish Dancing society! She wears the poncho I knitted for her, has pink sandals, retro Laura Ashley clothes, drinks Earl Grey tea, shops at her local veg market and owns her first bicycle, which she calls Violet! 

The great thing is though... We talk on FaceTime, Skype, send pictures via What'sapp, and Facebook and all 3 children, now in their 20's, ring home in Sunday's for a chat with us both.

Happy Days 

What Would You Say to the 18 Year Old You? 

Gill Barham - Building A Team With The Goal Of Saving A Million Lives a Year.