What we get wrong about deadlines, the key to curbing perfectionism, and more top insights

What’s happening in the world of work: The Saturday edition of the Daily Rundown highlights the business trends, perspectives, and hot topics you need to know to work smarter. Read on and join the conversation.

We should all take a deadline breather: We’re primed to think of deadlines — a primary source of work stress — as far more strict than they actually are, according to researchers from Harvard Business School and Ohio State. After studying 10,000 employees and managers, the researchers found that extension requests were, on average, received positively and even as a sign of motivation. Many workers, particularly women employees, fear such requests indicate a lack of competence or commitment. But outside of truly urgent deadlines, managers don’t perceive extension requests in that way, regardless of gender. ? Here’s what people are saying.

Put perfectionism in its place: Striving for perfection may sound admirable, but it’s more likely to lead to anxiety and depression than improved performance, according to research published in the Journal of Applied Psychology. That’s partly because having impossibly high standards can put us in paralysis. What should we do instead? Embrace the fact that your first attempts are likely to be mediocre, or perhaps worse, writes Quartz’s Sarah Todd. Focus on the task rather than your immediate feelings. And seek out people you trust to help you improve. ? Here’s what people are saying.

You Asked: “I’m constantly being given new tasks with ultra-short deadlines (write an app in two days, severely change another at the same time, write R&D reports for large projects also alongside the other two tasks). It feels like the moment I complete one thing, I have two more urgent tasks to complete. I’m fine with it, but beginning to grow concerned that it will lead to mistakes with long term impacts because I don’t have time to properly review my code (we don’t have a quality assurance team). How can I convey this concern to my boss without it seeming like just a complaint about workload?” — Joshua Hitchen, Software Developer at Metro Security

• “First and foremost, Metro Security is lucky to have you. Many people out there would just say ‘The code’s good enough and I’ll deal with the fixes as they crop up.’ Here’s my recommendation: Do your homework before you speak with your boss. Map your last month’s worth of work so you can give context on the things you do. Then request a meeting with a subject line, “Seeking Advice.” When you start the meeting, use an upbeat tone. This fires oxytocin, which encourages creativity, which is what you want this meeting to be about — solving problems. Tell the boss you’ve got lots going on, and it’s great to be busy, but you need some help and explain where and why you need the help. Come up with some options for solving the problem such as, ‘I can be better at writing code than switching to proposals and then back to code. How about having a different member of the team write proposal drafts, and I’ll check their work?’ At the end of the day, it’s about having candid conversations with context and a willingness to make the team better. People will lean into problems when you’re thoughtful about how you approach them versus coming across as whining and complaining.” — Alden Mills, author of “Unstoppable Teams: The Four Essential Actions of High-Performance Leadership”
• Dorie Clark, strategy consultant and adjunct professor at Duke Fuqua School of Business:  “As with many things in life, the majority of problems can be avoided with a detailed conversation upstream well before any actual deadlines. Expectations are tricky and they're often unstated, and often unrealistic. Having detailed conversations up front, can help spare you confusion and dissatisfaction down the road, because you know where you stand.”

Looking for career advice from the pros? Submit your questions in the comments with #YouAsked and we’ll take care of the rest.

With feedback, a ‘velvet hammer’ beats a ‘dirt sandwich’: Sneaking critical feedback in between compliments mainly leads to confusion and disappointment. Author and management expert Joy Baldridge suggests you put the “compliment sandwich” down and instead use the “velvet hammer,” feedback that’s delivered with a soft touch but still packs a punch. By asking for the person’s help and suggestions to solve the problem, all while being clear that the behavior cannot continue, you can keep the conversation positive and transparent. ? Here’s what people are saying.

Forget time. Manage your attention instead: Instead of fretting about how you are using the precious hours and minutes of your day, Wharton’s Adam Grant recommends that you focus on managing your attention instead. Notice what motivates you most during specific parts of the day and the week. Let those signals guide how you plot out your work. “Attention management is the art of focusing on getting things done for the right reasons, in the right places and at the right moments,” Grant writes. ? Here’s what people are saying.  

One last idea:  Many of us are automatically inclined to brush praise under the rug, disqualifying it before we even have a chance to let such compliments brighten our day. Psychologist Joan Rosenberg recommends a simple shift that may help us reap the benefits of kind words.

“If you find it difficult to accept praise or compliments, you can start by saying a simple, sincere ‘Thank you’ or ‘I appreciate that.’ Then, take a little time later to imagine what your life would be like if you believed the words were true.”

What's your take? Join the conversations on today's stories in the comments.

— Scott Olster