What the Ukrainians I know, now know
We're approaching the first anniversary of war in Ukraine. At the time the war started I posted “The Ukrainians I know …” explaining why I felt the advance of neighbouring forces might not go as swiftly as the international media felt it would at the time.
I'm relieved to say so far my hope has held firm. Ukraine has been unmovable and inspiring. While millions initially marvelled at this, understandably many now turn their attention to issues more closely impacting their own lives. In our house however, for obvious reasons, we've remained glued to the goings on in Eastern Europe. Your focus tends to sharpen when you read an email from relatives asking if you can procure a bullet proof vest for a stubborn grandfather refusing to escape to Poland.
Undeniably this is an event of historical significance which will remake our geopolitical order. In my home there've been more intimate impacts already felt. For my 3 daughters observing the war, as young people of Ukrainian heritage, this has been a formative event. A strange but significant teachable moment that will shape their values for the rest of their lives.
No matter how tragic a circumstance, there's always opportunity to learn. I was reminded of this when reading Luke Harding’s book “Invasion – The Inside Story of Russia’s Bloody War & Ukraine’s Fight for Survival”
In the book he tells the story of a group of Ukrainian civilians trapped in a hopeless position of no escape. The older children while away their time by teaching younger children to read - testament that each moment is an opportunity to learn - no matter the gravity of the circumstance.
In that spirit, here are the lessons I feel this conflict has taught my daughters to date and links to the articles and interviews they have learned these lessons from.
A year in, this is what the Ukrainians I know, now know.
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It is right to stand firmly for what you feel is right.
Watching Ukrainians stand for what they feel is right against seemingly insurmountable odds has been important for my daughters to witness. Seeing average Ukrainians side by side with former presidents, both equally prepared to defend their city without hesitation has helped my daughters to fully understand that sometimes you must draw an uncrossable line.
One CNN interview early in war I watched with my oldest daughter illustrated this principle superbly. Former President Poroshenko tearfully told the interviewer Ukraine had more willing enlistees than weapons at that stage of the conflict. He then said defiantly they would hold their position “forever”.
So compelled by the former President was my teenage daughter she did the unthinkable. She put her phone down and watched the entire interview in silence! I could see she feared for this man's very safety but she understood his reasons for standing and not running even though his wealth and privilege made that possible.
There've been numerous articles of Ukrainians standing like this and how defiance has often bought their war effort invaluable extra time. They've been industrious, resourceful and brave. I've shared articles like this one from The Wall Street Journal with my oldest daughter to continually make the point to her on the importance of standing when the time comes if the cause is one you believe passionately in.
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Real leadership is not what is written on your resume.
Ukraine has a checkered past politically. There undoubtedly have been corrupt leaders who've not acted in the best interests of the people. In our house this has been a topic of conversation for years and when Volodymyr Zelensky was elected in 2019 I scoffed at the thought of a comedian finding their way into the President's chair saying it was typical of the country’s dysfunction.
Zelensky has proven himself a leader of historical consequence and I've had to admit to my oldest daughter, like her Dad a student of politics, that I was wrong about him. Since the beginning of the conflict, she and I have discussed many great historical leaders and their often colourful backgrounds. Churchill and FDR have been discussed at length. Men seemingly beyond their political or physical prime who still had the ability to galvanise their people to crush the most evil ideology.
A more recent example of Greta Thunberg has also been discussed; an average school age girl who has focussed global attention on climate change through powerful words and meaningful action. Malala Yousafzai's unbreakable spirit has also been tabled. As has MLK.
The lesson is these people didn’t tell others they were leaders. Instead they just lead at a time when leadership was needed.
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Real support means real action.
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Midway through the year a refugee Ukrainian family entered our local community. For obvious reasons of language they were connected with my wife. The family consisted of a mother, a teenage son and a young girl. The men of the family able to fight, stayed to do so.
The examples shown by our local community in helping this family has demonstrated to my daughters that real support requires real action. It has also shown that it does sometimes “take a village” - in times of real need the widest support network you can garner is the biggest blessing you can hope for.
My wife has helped navigate our bureaucracy to establish the family in Australia. She lobbied our local Catholic primary school to find a place for the young girl to continue her studies.?The school principal’s efforts to make this happen were amazing. In the same way the efforts of her country’s fighters made my wife proud to be Ukrainian, the school principal’s efforts made me proud to be Australian. Nothing was an issue. If there were hurdles in getting this girl a place we definitely did not see them. Arms were opened as widely as they could be.
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The size of the person in the fight is less important than the size of the fight in the person.
Much of the global community feared Ukraine would capitulate in week but as I said in my first piece I wasn’t so sure. In March a report from Kyiv proved this point while causing much needed levity in our house. It detailed how a Ukrainian grandmother had disabled an enemy surveillance drone by throwing a jar of pickled cucumbers at it.?
(https://www.businessinsider.com/kyiv-grandma-took-down-ussian-drone-with-jar-tomato-pickles-2022-3)
We laughed out loud at the story agreeing that any Ukrainian grandmother we knew would have acted precisely the same way when faced with the same unwanted visitor. We laughed even harder days later when it was reported the grandmother in question had contacted local media to set the record straight that her weapon of choice was in fact tomatoes with plums. Grandmothers believe honesty remains the best policy, even in the fog of war.
There've been numerous stories of ordinary Ukrainians standing like this grandmother did. I was particularly moved by the school principal unprepared to stop teaching Ukrainian lessons at the direction on her occupiers preferring torture over their request.
Where you come from really matters and respect for culture is respect for those who’ve come before.
In April we celebrated Orthodox Easter. For those who’ve lived through this celebration know that it consists of two things – eating for large portions of the weekend and sitting in a church for the remaining time. As we headed to mass on Easter Sunday as a family I gave my atheist daughter the opportunity of a Dad endorsed sleep in. To my surprise she said she’d “tag along”.
She sat in the church quietly for more than an hour scanning the faces of worshippers. I had the sense she was glad to be there, in a place she usually is dragged to kicking and screaming.
After mass I asked her directly “Why did you come today?” She told me “It is what Baba Julia would've wanted.” Baba Julia, her great grandmother, was the feisty and fierce family matriarch I spoke of in my first piece.?My daughter was right. Julia would have thoroughly approved of her attendance.
This daughter and I have discussed the Ukrainian culture many times since the beginning of the war – its beauty and the importance of keeping its heart beating in our family. We've made a conscious effort to do that. I've made many dinners since the war began of varenyky, the traditional potato dumpling (which ironically Ukrainians and Russians both claim as their own without any conflict or fanfare). ?I'd also be confident we're the only Australian family that had the national anthem of Ukraine show prominently in our 2022 Spotify Wrapped playlist.
Late last year my daughter and I sat again watching CNN on the day Ukrainian forces liberated Kherson. We saw pride in that culture spill out as the people of the city broke into spontaneous songs of joy at reclaiming their home.
Again, Julia’s approval would have been absolute. I told my daughter it was the best thing I’d seen on television all year long.
My daughter’s stronger cultural appreciation gained over the last year has not only put down deeper roots into her own heritage but I've seen it develop in her a greater tolerance and compassion for the backstories and traditions of others. This to me this is seemingly the most invaluable lesson of all the invaluable lessons my daughters have collected in the last 12 months.
While I am glad that my daughters have a greater respect for their heritage and culture plus a more acute understanding of the importance of standing for principle, I wish these lessons could've been learned by observing something less tragic than this conflict.
My hope for the fast approaching second year of the war in Ukraine is that 2023's lesson is that peace and shared understanding is better than seemingly never ending senseless slaughter.
Principal at IPD Communications
2 年Great reflections on what you are seeing Paul. We keep hoping for the best for the Ukrainian people, which, as you point out, is something they are very actively working on!
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2 年Sensational read ????????
Thanks for sharing Paul ??????????Wasn’t Baba Julia from Kherson Oblast (state) too?