What Travelling With My Daughter Taught Me

My recent travels to Malaysia and South Korea with my daughter brought me face-to-face with survival mode.?

Travelling to unfamiliar places, facing language barriers, and navigating unique cultures created a constant state of alertness. My focus shifted entirely to the logistics of travel: ensuring my daughter was safe, had nourishing food, and was prepared for her matches. Every day felt like a checklist of essential tasks, and my mind was so locked into “protection mode” that I lost sight of the most valuable part of our trip: connection.

I only realised the depth of this shift when my daughter, as she often does after a trip, asked me for photos to remember the experience.?

I scrolled through my phone, only to find I’d barely taken any photos. My attention had been so occupied with survival that I had hardly documented the journey. It was as if the moments of joy and connection had been overshadowed by the need to “get through” each day.?

Reflecting on this, I noticed how easily stress can pull us into survival mode, pushing connection and joy to the side.

The physical effects of stress were evident too. My shoulders were tense, my breathing shallow, and my energy depleted. I’d been running on a low-grade fight-or-flight response for days, and it was taking a toll on my body. This experience reminded me of the core of Embrace Your Extraordinary: living from a place of purpose, joy, and vitality instead of survival.?

When we’re in survival mode, our focus narrows, and we lose sight of the beauty around us. Recognising this was a wake-up call for me to consider how I can shift from surviving to thriving, even in demanding situations.

On the way home, I journaled on what I would do differently next time. How can I remain grounded in love, presence, and connection rather than survival? Here’s what I discovered:

1. Prioritise Moments of Shared Joy. Next time, I want to intentionally create and savour moments of joy with my daughter, whether through photos, journaling, or simply being present. Instead of focusing solely on logistics, I’ll make a conscious effort to celebrate the little moments. These are what create meaningful connections and memories that last long after the trip is over.
2. Conscious Breathwork and Grounding Practices. Knowing how stress affects my nervous system, I’m committing to daily grounding practices, like mindful breathing. Even a few moments each morning to centre myself can shift my focus from fear to presence. Simple grounding practices, such as placing my feet on the earth, focusing on my breath, and visualising calm energy, could have been done during the trip and would have helped me stay present.
3. Reframe Situations with Curiosity Over Control. During the trip, I often found myself trying to control every detail. Going forward, I want to approach the unknown with curiosity instead. Viewing each situation as an opportunity for learning allows me to open up to unexpected joy and connection rather than being limited by fear of what might go wrong.
4. Practice Self-Compassion. Travelling with my daughter is both rewarding and demanding. By acknowledging my efforts and practising self-compassion, I can shift away from seeing worry as a weakness. Instead, I’ll remind myself that worry is a form of care, and it’s okay to feel it. This reminder will help me stay connected to the moment, deepening my bond with Scarlett.

This trip was filled with a whirlwind of emotions; excitement, frustration, worry, pride. When my daughter fell ill before a match and chose to push through, I felt a mix of pride, empathy, and protectiveness. It reminded me that resilience and emotional intelligence aren’t about suppressing emotions; they’re about recognizing and learning from them.

I’ve learned to pause and acknowledge each emotion without letting it take over. Practising gratitude and breathing through each high and low has taught me that emotional intelligence is a muscle that grows every time we allow ourselves to feel fully and respond intentionally. Embracing the full spectrum of emotions allows us to connect more deeply to ourselves and to each other, fostering a richer, more resilient life.

This trip taught me that embracing the extraordinary isn’t about erasing fear; it’s about navigating it mindfully. It’s about grounding myself in joy, connection, and presence. When I let go of the need to control every detail, I can see each moment as an opportunity for growth.

Every journey, every challenge, and every emotion has something valuable to teach us.?

What could you own experiences of survival mode teach you??