What if stress was our friend, not our enemy?

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In high-stress roles, such as those in the civil service, stress can sometimes seem like just a normal part of the job. You might not like it, but you just shrug it off, ignore it and keep going. What if, instead of viewing stress as a nuisance, you could see it as an early-warning system? In the same way that pain can tell us something is damaging our bodies and we need to act, stress can be a valuable signal that it’s time to reset, rethink, and reprioritise.

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?Stress as a messenger, not the enemy

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Stress can feel like the enemy when it’s overwhelming and persistent and we all would prefer to live a stress-free life. However. it’s also a powerful messenger. It is telling us that our brain is perceiving something as a threat, that it is triggering the fear response.

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Our body responds to perceived threats by producing stress hormones, such as cortisol and adrenaline, priming us for action. This is our fight, flight or freeze response kicking in. It gets our bodies ready for action, but nowadays stress does not normally come from physical threats and running away very fast is not a great solution if someone is stressing you out in the office.

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The serious problems start when stress becomes chronic. At that point it can lead to burnout, impacting our mental, emotional, and physical wellbeing.

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It is only natural that we want to minimise stress or just push through it, but what if we learned to see it as our minds sending us a message? When we feel tension creeping in or notice that anxious feeling growing, it’s often our body’s way of saying, “Something isn’t right—pay attention.”

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Dealing with stress

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So once you accept that stress is telling you that something needs to change, what can you do? There are four steps you can take that will help you:

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Step 1: Be more aware of when stress is being triggered

Step 2: Identify your stress triggers

Step 3: Take action to deal with the root causes

Step 4: Use stress management techniques

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?Step 1: Being more aware of when stress is trying to tell you something

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Recognising stress means being more aware of what is happening in our bodies. The signs can sometimes be subtle, such as a feeling of unease, trouble sleeping, or difficulty concentrating. At other times, they’re more obvious, like constant fatigue, headaches, or even irritability. Here are a few common signs that stress is trying to tell you something:

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1. Frequent physical symptoms such as headaches, stomach problems, tense muscles, or trouble sleeping.

2. Mood swings leaving you feeling unusually anxious, irritable, or overwhelmed.

3. Lacking motivation and finding it harder to get started on tasks or feeling detached from work you used to enjoy.

4. Mental fog and difficulty focusing or remembering details, even small things.

5. Social withdrawal and feeling less inclined to reach out to friends, family, or colleagues.

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These aren’t just signs of exhaustion. They are also indicators that it may be time to hit “pause” and evaluate what’s happening to us.

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?Step 2: Understanding what is causing the stress

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Once you start being more aware of when your stress is being triggered, the next step is to understand why it’s happening. Rather than simply managing the symptoms, we need to identify the root causes. This could be anything from an overwhelming workload, unclear expectations, or a lack of support. By uncovering these sources, you can begin to make adjustments that lead to real, lasting change.

?List areas contributing to stress and rate them from 1 (very relaxed) to 10 (very stressed). For example, if you’re overwhelmed with work, you might score it a 9. Assess each area, such as job security, relationships, and workload, to identify what needs your focus

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Step 3: Taking action to deal with the root causes

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The next stage is to work out what actions you can take to improve these scores. Remember to think clearly about what factors you can control or influence as there is little point in focussing on anything else. Start by picking the most important area that needs working on and think about what you could do there to improve the situation.

For example, we often take on too much because we haven’t clearly defined limits—both for ourselves and with others. Changing this might mean setting realistic deadlines, learning to say “no” to extra tasks when you’re already stretched, or ensuring you have dedicated time away from work to recharge. Healthy boundaries protect your time and energy, making you better equipped to handle challenges without constant overwhelm.

Another common adjustment that needs making involves practical shifts in your daily routine to reduce pressure points. For example, prioritising tasks based on urgency and importance, or delegating responsibilities when possible, can create more space for focus and recovery. Small changes like these can have a significant impact over time, helping to create a more balanced workload.

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Step 4: Using stress management to build resilience

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While addressing the root causes of stress is essential, managing symptoms in the meantime helps you stay resilient while you are doing that. Stress management techniques, such as breathing exercises, progressive muscle relaxation, and mindfulness, are powerful tools for calming the body and mind. They switch off the mind’s fear response and allow you to pause, reset, and approach situations with a clearer perspective.

Regular physical activity, eating a healthy diet and prioritising restful sleep are also vital for stress resilience. Movement helps release endorphins, which naturally improve your mood, while good sleep hygiene supports emotional regulation and energy levels. Together, these practices provide a foundation for both mental and physical wellbeing, allowing you to face stress with greater strength.

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Key takeaway

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Stress is a call to act, not just something to put up with. By listening, making adjustments, and managing it wisely, you can turn stress into a pathway to resilience