What Story Are You Living?

Carl Jung, Joseph Campbell and others have made archetypes – the stories, myths, themes and symbols that unconsciously influence our lives – a familiar concept. What Story Are You Living? goes a step further providing a measurement tool to uncover and harness the transformational power of archetypes. It will help you:

• Discover the archetypal patterns and themes unconsciously influencing your life.
• Replace unproductive life patterns by awakening unrealized potential
• Discover hidden strengths, motivational triggers, and new career directions, and
• Improve personal and workplace relationships.

With "What Story Are You Living" i have created a guide for discovering and directing the unconscious influences that drive your life story.

HOW AND WHY WE LIVE STORIES

We are storytelling creatures. Listen to people talking in a restaurant, at the water cooler or at a party and you will quickly find that the majority of what they say is in the form of stories. We connect by telling each other stories. We can better understand ourselves by recognizing and exploring our life narratives. Your life story is the tale that your repeatedly tell yourself about who you are, what you want, what you can and cannot do. Before the second year of life, we are sensitive to the tone of stories lived around us, and we have already begun collecting thousands of images that resonate emotionally with us in some important way. At first the plots are inconsistent and illogical – much as our dreams continue to be. By elementary school , we follow particular rules about the beginning, middle and ending of stories, so they begin to make sense. By adolescence, we tell ourselves consistent stories about our lives that define who we are, how we came to be that way, and where we are headed. We see events that we can recount as vignettes of our central life narrative.

Although there are as many variations of life stories as there are individuals, people tend to create narratives according to a finite number of templates. There are a very small number of general narrative forms in the world’s literature, movies, art. The same is true of characters and the roles they play. How can this be?

In the first part of the twentieth century, the psychiatrist Carl Jung recognized the universality of characters and situations. Just as there are certain musical tones that sound resonant across cultures, there are similarly a universal set of roles, situations and themes that are recognizable by everyone. These universal templates are called archetypes, which is derived from the Greek archetypos, meaning ‘molded first as a model’ (Merriam Webster 2002). Jung, and many other after him, saw that these stories which recur in literature and art are the same narratives we as humans live. For example we all recognize the love story whether we encounter it in a movie, an opera , or a novel. And when we fall in love, we experience for ourselves what that story is about. When we are in a loving relationship, we not only learn major life lessons (in this case about intimacy, sensuality, pleasure, and commitment) but we also feel a sense of connection to all the other people who have ever loved deeply. While each love is different, there is a deep pattern that transcends these differences. When we understand the stories and recognize their universality, we can connect with each other at deeper and more conscious levels, using the archetypal stories as the foundation.

This may be especially true of the sacred myths of cultures, which are particularly archetypal, as they express in metaphor people’s actual experiences. These stories do not necessarily have to be taken literally. Rather, the concrete outward actions symbolize inner experiences. We read the story of an outward journey and something resonates in our inward journey.

This is why people talk about ‘life journeys’, even if they have never outwardly left the town where they grew up. People connect immediately to a journey story from another culture finding resonance with the characters and the form and the phases of the journey, even if the particular details are not familiar. Such stories influence people for good or ill. Archetypal stories can provide breakthroughs in insight and move people toward harmony and success, but such stories are equally able to tempt people toward less productive, even destructive behaviors. Either way, an understanding of the archetypal narrative can enhance insight or enable people to break free of destructive patterns.

The archetypal stories described in this seminar are those associated with the heroine’s or hero's journey, which is a model for the individuation process (the process of finding yourself and connecting to your depth and your full potential). They are named by the primary character in each story: Dreamer, Independent, Warrior, Caregiver, Explorer, Lover, Outlaw, Creator, Master, Magician, Sage and Jester.

Living the Stories in Everyday Life: Stages and Situations

When we are living a particular story, we tend to see the world from its vantage point. What we notice in the world and what actions we think make sense grow naturally from that story. For example when someone who is living a Warrior story is having a difficult time with another person she may react in a strong and challenging way, defending her own position. If this person were living a Caregiver story, however, she might instead show concern for what was causing the other person to be difficult, seeking to understand and reassure. When we develop narrative intelligence, we are able to see why we react the way we do and understand the different assumptions and behaviors of others.

There are a host of characters and situations from which these stories are drawn. Such characters have come to be known as archetypes, and they define basic stories, although for each person the details will be unique. These archetypes can be looked at as guides that help us know when we are on our best path and taking the most appropriate action. Your results from the "What Story Are You Living?" questionnaire help you identify these characters as a way to make sense out of the stories you are living, which allows you to create a richer and more satisfying life.

Many people recognize over time that there is one story that provides the central meaning and purpose of their lives. In addition, other stories are lived out at different times and places. If you think about it, you may notice that different stages of life have offered you new situations, new scenery, new people to be with, even the unfolding of a new storyline. You can see such situations as a stage set, with costumes and supporting characters that seem to pull you into a story line (the plot to be lived out). Such settings have immense power.

Certain life stages typically place us in situations that invite us into specific narratives. For example: if you had a very happy childhood, you likely lived the story of the Dreamer (Innocence). Others were caring for you, and you simply had to trust their wisdom, experiment, and learn what to do to succeed. Living this story provided you with a baseline sense of trust and optimism about life. Living this story provided you with a baseline sense of trust and optimism about life. If, on the other hand, your childhood was difficult you may have lived an Orphan story. This does not mean that you were literally orphaned (although it could). Rather it means that the adults in your life were too distracted, unskilled or wounded to care for you properly (physically, emotionally or intellectually). In this case, you may have experienced a story that had as theme the challenge of coping in a situation of minor or major deprivation or wounding. Likely this would provide a baseline approach to life that was more cautious and realistic, even pessimistic. Or you might have lived both stories – either sequentially (if your life situation changed) or the same time (if your experience with the caregivers in your life was mixed).

As you grew older; you may have become less dependent upon your parents and other authority figures, wanting to explore your own identity and the world outside. You might even have become somewhat oppositional, especially in your adolescent years. You might think of this as living an Explorer story; which exemplifies the gifts of independence and identiy. At roughly this same time in life, you may have become interested in romance; and so you began living out a Lovers’ story; developing the gifts of intimacy and sensuality. This may have led to marriage and children in which case you suddenly needed to live the story of the Caregiver, demonstrating the ability to nurture and even sacrifice for others.

The list of stories we may live at different stages of our lives can go on and on. The major point here is that success in life is often determined by how well we live out these stories, for it is in the living that we develop in mature, responsible, moral and successful adults.

So many people today talk about the need for character – in public officials, in the heads of corporations, and in the young. However character cannot be formed by simply enjoining people to act appropiately. We all know from making New Year’s resolutions that simply deciding to do or not do something is not enough to guarantee success. Becoming good, moral and successful requires knowledge of how to develop the inner qualities that make it easy to do so. Every life situation carries within it a call to live a story that offers experiences that can make us great – or, conversely, bring out what is petty, small or harmful within us. It is much easier to avoid the slippery slope of life’s negative temptations and traps when we can recognize the positive potential within situations.

The stories identified in this seminar link everyday life with the great, mythic stories that inform what it means to be human. Many people, however, sleepwalk through stories that emerge naturally in certain life stages and life situations and consequently they lack a sense of meaning and purpose in their lives. At worst, living in this unconscious way decreases their ability to gain the gifts associated from living the great stories; leaves them feeling alone with their problems, and decreases their ability to become the kind of mature and wise people capable of making a positive difference to their families, friends, community and field of work. When people lack the ability to know what story they are living, they may fail to develop the qualities required to take adult responsibility for the state of their families, communities and the larger world.

When we recognize that we are living a unique personal story, as well as one of the universal great narratives , our lives can be filled with meaning, purpose and dignity. At the same time, we feel less lonely because we can see that we share commonality with all the people in all times and places, who have lived through the challenges of that story.

Exploring Archetypal Stories

Archetypes are psychological structures reflected in symbols, images and themes common to all cultures and all times. You see them in recurring images in art, literature, myths and dreams. You may experience archetypes directly as different parts of you. If you say that on one hand you want one thing and on the other you want something else, you can give archetypal names to those parts, as they generally communicate desires and motivations common to humans everywhere. Although the potential characters within us are universal, each of us expresses them differently, endowing them with somewhat different styles, traits and mannerisms. For example, when the Warrior is an archetype, different kinds of Warriors engage in difficult battles.

The Warrior Archetype encompasses the warlord and the samurai but it also might include the dedicated biologist racing to be on the first team to map the human genome, the advocate for social justice or the member of a street gang. Each of these Warriors follows a different code of honor, goals, style of dress etc; nevertheless all of them are Warriors. The expression of an archetype will be influenced by a person’s culture, setting and time in history but it will also be a manifestation of his or her individuality.

As aspects of yourself archetypes can reveal your most important desires and goals. Understanding their expression in your personal myths and stories helps you gain access to unrealized potential, grasp the logic and importance of your life and increase your empathy for the stories that others live.

In this computer-literate society you might think of an archetype as analogous to computer software that helps you to accomplish certain tasks. For example, a word processing program can be used to write a letter report or book; other applications help with accounting and financial planning and reporting. But these programs would be of no help if you confused their functions. Similarly, the Warrior helps people to be more focused, disciplined, and tough; the Lover helps them to be more passionate, intimate and loving; while the Jester helps them lighten up and enjoy their lives. When a particular archetype is awakened you live out its story. In the process you are able to accomplish definable new tasks. However it is also important that the archetype to be relevant to the task you are facing. If you are going on a date, the evening is not likely to end well if you act out a war story. Conversely most people find it wise not to go into war with the Lover’s vulnerability or the Jester’s playfulness.

In the ancient world, many people projected the archetypes outwardly onto images of gods and goddesses. In the twentieth century, Jung explored the manifestation of the psychological symbols of archetypes and their role in healing. What Story are You Living? makes it easier for you to determine and recognize twelve of the archetypes in your daily life. Understanding your story and archetypes can help you better decide the underlying logic of your life, find greater fulfillment and satisfaction, and free yourself from living out limiting?patterns and behaviors. Such knowledge can also increase your insight into other people, thus greatly enhancing your relationships. Most important, understanding these deep psychological structures will make your individuation process – the process of finding yourself and fulfilling your potential- conscious, so that you can gain the gifts associated with maturity, success and happiness.

When each archetype is active in a person’s life, it tends to call forth a particular kind of story or plot. After you have answered What Story areYou Living? questionnaire, you will want to become familiar with these stories and plots and their archetypal characters. After you have become familiar with the archetypes, you will want to validate and review your results and then develop some practical understanding of how to use them to rewrite your own story.

The Mythic Journey

Dreamer? Developing the trust, confidence and optimisme to take the journey

Realist?? Recognizing that bad things happen and developing realism

Warrior??Learning to compete, set goals, and when necessary defend yourself

Caregiver?Showing care, concern, and compassion for others, helping

Explorer??Being willing to be different, having to courage to try new things

Lover??? Loving others, being romantic, intimate and making connections

Outlaw?? Letting go and starting over; taking action to end bad situations

Creator??Demonstrating imagination, innovation and cleverness

Ruler???Taking charge, being responsible, living according to your values

Magician? Changing what happens by altering your own thoughts or behavior

Sage???Thinking clearly, critically, and formulating your own opinions

Jester???Enjoying your life and work; being here now

Archetypal Stages of the Journey

The archetypes and their stories are engaged more subtly as they emerge at different stages of the journey. The mythic heroine’s journey may or may not be the order in which you have lived the stories of these archetypes. The order in which the archetypes are presented is only a typical order in which they may be encountered during the course of development and thus a logical order in the unfolding of a story. In addition, one or more archetypes may be active throughout your life and become critical to your sense of who you are. To begin your understanding of how archetypes influence your life review the summary of archetypes above and check the archetypes that are most germane to your life at this time.

Note that the journey is a spiral so you may revisit these stages at different times in your life and at different times in your life and at different levels of sophistication. Sometimes a particular archetype that you encountered earlier in your life is called for again in a later phase of your life. Therefore remember that your "What Story are You Living?” results are not static. They may change in the future (you might want to retake the questionnaire every six months or so if you are changing and growing rapidly).

When you have learned to live a number of stories consciously, you can have access to their gifts and approaches in a flowing way; allowing you to respond well in various situations. Once you have gained reasonable story flexibility, you may notice a variety of archetypes active during any given task or situation. For example, you may begin an endeavor full of hope and optimism (Dreamer) but then problems emerge. You face them squarely, noticing who or what is being hurt by whom or by what (Realist). Then you take action to help those affected (Caregiver) and to remedy or eliminate the cause of the problem (Warrior). If you take the issue deeper, you then pursue cutting-edge solutions (Explorer), make needed sacrifices (Outlaw) while safe-guarding the people and values you cherish (Lover). You create a new vision (Creator) taking responsibility to implement the plan, using realistic means and timetables (Ruler). To ensure succes, you shift your own attitudes and behaviors to be congruent with the outcome you desire (Magician), objectively monitor and evaluate progress (Sage) and make the process as enjoyable as possible, eventually celebrating your success (Jester).?While this example demonstrates problem solving using the energies of all the archetypes, only some of the archetypes may be needed in a given situation, as noted previously you may experience the archetypes in a different order. If a problem is not adequately solved an additional archetype may need to be available to you and others involved in the situation.

As you review and explore your What Story are You Living? you may find it useful to discuss them with a friend or a professional. Coaches, educators and leaders often use these theories to assist people in their personal and professional journeys. You can also use the insight derived from understanding archetypes to increase communication between team members or a project team; or to foster environments that encourage people to fulfill their potential.

When you want to talk privately or for your speaking event about 'What Story Are You Living?" send me a personal message here on linkedin. Looking forward to our meeting.