What selling truly is?

What are we selling, really? That is a big question to answer. I’ve been asking sales professionals in many countries about their jobs together with that question. I got different answers each time which is good because that’s how we started to redefine what selling really is. But this very same question got me think a lot today when the person who asked that question was my son. During our lunch time, he asked: “Dad, what is that that you are selling?”

For a person who writes a lot about selling and teaches people about selling, even published a book on sales excellence, why would that question make me think a lot today? I didn’t understand that feeling, but I knew something really evolved in my understanding of selling since this morning. I realized that selling is like a growing entity with knowledge and emotions and we as sellers need to know how to really tag along well with it. I used to think we were the ones leading the sales process, but for some reason, I let the selling spirit lead my conversation this morning. The outcome was so strange and astounding.

Let’s put Maslow’s hierarchy of needs as a fundamental for how we sell. For each target customer, we need to change our approach accordingly. If what they needed was safety, sell them things that make them feel safe and comfortable. But if a person was really in need of food and water, give them what they need. The process gets a lot harder going up the ladder. If you need love and belonging, how can I sell you that? What about the people with great successes? What can we sell to them when they have almost everything already? It is hard, isn’t it?

Then an answer emerged. It is not only a promise we sell with our products and services. A promise is something we commit to making. That is important, and it is a foundation for future partnership and friendship. If I promised you that my products and services will deliver point XYZ and they did, great. I fulfilled my commitment. You got what you wanted, eventually you will build more trust in me. Hopefully one day you will find me good enough to do more business transactions. Eventually, we can be friends. Wow, I’d love that. Can we do more as sellers?

Yes, we can. This morning I had a challenging but great time sharing my services for a future partnership with a wonderful group of people. They are highly accomplished individuals. And for months, I got stuck creating new business with them. Then I changed the approach right in the middle of our conversation. Instead of selling my ideas, I asked about their dreams. What legacy is defined by each of them? What do they want to be remembered for when they are no longer on earth? What would be the biggest dreams they want to accomplish? And here are the two questions I never used before. “What were those big dreams you wanted to do for people and for the world when you were a little kid?”. The second is “What happened to those dreams?”

We all have our dreams. We all want to make positive impacts on our ability. And life somehow has its ways to move us in different directions and we forget those dreams. It doesn’t matter what products and services we are selling. If we are doing that job, think about it to sell a dream or dreams to someone. A dream that they might forget. A dream that they miss recognizing. A dream that they are struggling to pursuit. Help them achieve that dream, and they will help you achieve your dreams.

I'll leave this article with one big question: "What is the one dream would you want to sell to people around you?"