What Scares Me

I have always liked to think of myself as someone who – despite being an active participant in the world in which they exist – is above the clichéd exultations that social media viciously throws at you to be the very best person I can be or to do something nice just this once. 

But truth be known – as much as I seek to invoke an intellectual snobbery that I am not capable of pulling off – the memes always make me stop and think, if only for a minute.

And so it was recently when I saw one such call out to “Do One Thing Every Day That Scares You!”

(Why is that they are always written in a grammatically challenged way with capitals on each word and usually superimposed over a genetically impossibly gifted human specimen lifting a too heavy weight in a too tight outfit!)

What is it that scares me and should I be doing it every day?

It is a simple question that, upon reflection, I have found to be more challenging than it appears.

My greatest fear – and that which scares me the most – is existing in a world without love.

There was a time in my life less chronicled where the finding of true love was a gift that I was not competent nor ready to unwrap.

Now the loss of true love is unimaginable and unbearable.

On a January day in 1999 I did indeed do the one thing that scared me – saying hello to my life partner for the first time – and what a wonderfully beautiful bounty that moment has resulted in.

In my not too distant past the fear of rejection - of a friendship, an idea, a job – was crushing to my soul.  

That is not to say that I am not still impacted by life’s many undesired detours, but I have now realised that rejection is the closest of cousins to exploring new worlds.

There is a chance with every hand offered, every thought suggested, every interview taken that one’s life will change in fundamental and profoundly positive ways. 

I am now prepared to risk that rejection to see the glorious glow of the promised land.

**

Upon reflection the fear that I have yet to confront – that which does scare me – is poorly defining my comfort zone.

What if I – what if us all – are capable of so much more than we ever dreamed possible.

Yet what if I – what if us all – set our expectations too low; care not enough or give up too early.

I would challenge anyone to truly say that they are safe in the knowledge knowing where that line of (un)comfortability should be.

The Great Communicator, Ronald Reagan had a wonderful insight on what it was to live:

There are no constraints on the human mind, no walls around the human spirit, no barriers to our progress except those we ourselves erect.

May we all break free of the shackles that our mind imposes.

May we all see the wall before us and knock them down.

May we all do something every day that scares us.

PS – Writing this post and seeking to catch the figments of my untamed thoughts was the one thing today – Wednesday 24th February 2016 – that I wanted to do that would scare me.

PPS – I guess I did it! :)