What It Means to Listen Generously by Allison "Allie" Massey

Listen Generously: Listening is more than simply “not speaking.” It’s giving your undivided attention to the needs and priorities of others. Set aside your own judgments and preconceived notions. Listen with care and with empathy. Most importantly, listen to understand.

Allison Massey from our Pittsburgh Alera team recently reviewed with our staff the importance of listening generously…Listening should be a simple thing, when someone is talking to you give them your undivided attention, easier said than done right? This is a skill that many people take for granted. It is often hard to stay focused on a conversation when we have a hundred other things on our minds. We all like to say we can multitask BUT in reality, the human brain cannot perform two tasks that require high-level brain function at once. When we attempt to listen to someone while we are trying to do something else, you are not able to completely focus. I will be the first to call myself out on not listening to someone. At least once a day, I will tell Blair that she needs to start over because I was not listening. For us to be successful communicators, we must learn to remove all distractions and filters that will cause us to ignore what someone is really saying. This should involve not thinking about what you are going to say while someone else is talking. There is some responsibility that does fall onto the speaker, when you need someone to listen to what you are saying, never just assume that they are able to stop in the middle of something and focus right in. When I need to have a conversation with someone and I need them to focus, I will get their attention and wait for them to be ready to focus on the conversation. 

In our industry it is extremely important that we strive in listening. If a client calls with an issue and we aren't giving them our undivided attention, we may not understand what the issue is. If we are calling carriers to see how something is covered or what the patient responsibility is and we hear wrong and then give incorrect information, this will not go over well for anyone. Even if it takes additional time, we should be confirming what someone is saying to us in order to prevent any possible issues. This way we can prevent any miscommunication from happening.

Great advice Allie!

Listening is caring.

When I started this current position about 5 years ago, it was a little outside of my comfort zone. For the prior 20 years, I had worked with clients, mostly in an account manager/client manager capacity, and now I am in charge of bringing new business to our agency. I guess that I had been trained in the past to do a lot more presenting/talking than listening. I found myself in meetings most of the time probably talking MUCH MORE than my customers rather than listening to their needs. Now that I have made the switch from presenter to active listener, it has truly made a world of difference.

Meetings in my world nowadays still involve identifying customer/client pain points and providing solutions, but first it’s all about the customer. Customers don’t care how much you know, they only care about how much you care and how it pertains to their business. I’ve also been able to take much better notes which allows for much more thorough follow through on meeting action items.

How about for those prospects that do not talk much? Well, you have to make eye contact and be able to read their body language/non-verbal communication. Have patience. Our generation nowadays expects instant results, and we live in a world of constant distractions/pings/texts. It’s hard to hear what your customer’s needs are through all the NOISE. Listening is more than not talking, it’s about seeing things through another person’s perspective. Take the focus off of yourself and your company.

Of course, this is easier said than done…one of my biggest hurdles was interrupting others and not allowing them to finish their sentences. How can you really listen to someone else if you are trying to speak on their behalf? Remember, humans are NOT creatures of logic, we are very emotional people, and being listened to is one of our greatest desires. It makes people feel good in addition to being productive.

This not only works well with clients/customers, but is very, very important when it comes to working with others. They want you to hear what they have to say as well. It’s easy to become so distracted and overwhelmed that we fail to see those people right in front of us.

Coach John Wooden said, “It’s what you learn after you know it all, that’s what separates average leaders from the elite ones.”

Remember, it’s not about you!