What Matters To You The Most and Why
The definition of family is clear according to Dictionary.com, “any group of persons closely related by blood". But that doesn’t define what family means to me as an individual. Family can also be used to describe friends, teammates and any other group you feel close to, in addition to your blood related family. The family I have known the longest are, however, the ones related to me by blood. They are the ones that have been there for me on my birthdays, graduations, potential religious events, and more.
My family in particular is special to me, more so than my friends and teammates I consider my family. My parents have done so much for me that I can never thank them enough for what they have sacrificed and given me. It’s no secret that my parents had a HUGE impact on the person I am today. In fact, I’d say they were the biggest reason I’m so passionate about personal values and development. Family isn’t just important, it’s what is most important!
I have been associated with the service industry for more than 6 years; one with a growing company, one a well-established MNC, followed by a break for six months, and the third an organisation serving toward building my nation for more than a century. My mentor, Partha, asked me recently why I had subject myself to the turbulent thought of quitting work. “Why did you do it at all?” he asked me. As I started to answer, he gave me a look, and said “maybe this isn’t a question you should answer using your brain; perhaps your heart might have something to say on this.” Sheepishly, I knew he was right: quitting a high paying job isn’t something I had done for myself, it was something for my family.
So why is it that my family matters the most to me? I feel, the success of an individual often starts at home. A positive family environment along with strong family values creates a very trustworthy and competent base for an individual. As the only son to my parents, I have been highly fortunate. Some of the things we grasp at the time of the teachable moment and others don't reveal themselves until we're further down the road of life. Some of the lessons are good, others are bad.
For my mother, I can honestly say that the title of her life lesson to me is strength. She battled fourth stage cancer for five years. At a point in life where I was completing my schooling to get admitted to a good university, my mother was fighting against an obstacle in her life. A mean, nasty, unwelcome obstacle that arrived one day in her life and simply said, “Deal with this.” And for five years, she did, all while still being a wife to my dad and a mother to me. But while my mother has been gone for over a decade, she left something behind for me: her strength. She gave me that battle-tested steel spine of hers on her last day. That steel spine is deep inside me now, welded to my soul at the core. And when the storms of life start to howl or the obstacle lands in my path, I can close my eyes and hear her voice say “not quitting” whenever I need it. Thank you, mother.
If there's one man who will always be a star in my eyes, it's my father. He taught me everything from how to ride a bike to how to have an opinion, and he always did it with a smile on his face and love in his heart. The lessons I can only learn from dad are some of the most important I will ever learn in my life, and while they may seem almost innate now, I actually had a teacher all along — my father. Forget elementary school, forget high school, forget college — the best schooling I ever received was
from the man who loves me the most. If I take a step back and take a look at my father, I realize that he has it all — and if I take an even further step back, I start to realize that he's been working all his life to instil in me the abilities and values I need to have it all too.
From my early teenage years, Dad encouraged me to set goals, whether it was something as simple as picking up a hobby, trying a new sport or learning a new skill. Setting measurable goals didn’t have to be rigorous, they just had to be things that were important to me and could be achieved. However, sometimes the advice he dished out was not the advice I wanted. In fact, sometimes it was downright annoying and was most certainly not always fun. But looking back, I know he was teaching me the exact lessons I needed at the moment, and that has been important for me to realize. I now do that same thing for others.” No matter how old I am or what position, it’s important to surround myself with people who will not only build you up but also be there when you need help or a dose of reality—offering real counsel to make you a better leader. Luckily, I was raised by a dad who had crazy hours and an insane day-to-day schedule. People ask me, ‘Why is that lucky?’ “Thanks to his busy professional life, Dad had to learn how to prioritize time for himself and his family, and it took work. Of all the lessons I’ve learned from him, this is the one I remember each day. Dad put relationships first.” This lesson can’t be overstated, and I had to learn it myself: Set aside dedicated time for your personal well-being and for family. It might seem cumbersome in the beginning, but doing so actually increased my productivity at work, which is a win-win.
In most households today, families have fallen on hard times where there is only one parent or where children are raising themselves. This pains me. Building strong families is a self-preservation strategy for any rational and sane society. It is a strength-based and wellness model which leads to evolutionary growth, resilience, and development towards the higher reaches of human nature. It is a vision of hope, based on the most powerful force in all of nature: love.
My love for my family, my desire for them to be proud of me and my decisions, is my life’s compass. I hope to advance my mission through my time and judgment. I consider serving as something of a civic duty, in addition to a challenging and enjoyable experience. Married to my high school sweetheart, I live with my father and my grand-parents. Nothing thrills me more than a smile on their face each and every single day.