What Makes a Great Coach?

There are certain skills that have objective measures, and therefore allow us to evaluate ourselves. For example, if you can write computer?code and the code effectively performs its desired outcome, then you can safely say you are competent in writing that particular code.

There are other skills for which determining your own expertise is impossible. For example, whether you are a great public speaker can only be determined by the reactions of others to your oration.

Coaching – whether performance, executive or life coaching — is in this latter camp. In a recent Harvard Business School?Article, Jack Zenger and Joseph Folkman showed that those who believe they are the best coaches, turn out not to be according to those they purport to coach.

In contrast, those who were rated the best coaches by their peers and coachees often rated themselves less skilled. To be fair, this matches the Dunning-Kruger effect (read?this post?for more on Dunning-Kruger) in which the least smart or skilled people in the room often believe they are the best. But there is a more nuanced phenomenon at play here.

The nature of coaching is not necessarily a skill acquired through study, but rather through practice and feedback. The smartest person in the room is usually less likely?to display the Dunning-Kruger effect, but the smartest person may very easily be the least effective coach despite grasping the concepts and “facts” about coaching.?

Coaching requires a unique set of skills, a high degree of discipline and the ability to switch into a completely service-oriented mode that is quite different than the skills valued in leaders, speakers, politicians or others who rely on charisma and oration for their success.?

So even though the skills are only mastered through practice and ongoing improvement, they can be listed and even taught. Nonetheless, the only real gauge for assessing your coaching skill is the experience?and results of those you coach. There simply is no other measurement device. Here are some important guidelines for effective executive and performance coaching which you can use to practice.

• Coaching is not management or advice.?As a coach, your goal is to ask questions and suggest inquiries, analogies, exercises or practices that can forward your coachee’s development. Don’t tell people you coach “the answer”, what to do or how to solve the problem.
• An effective coach typically spends at least 75% of his time listening rather than talking when coaching.?Often, when someone is allowed fully to explore a concern challenge or goal aloud, she will discover a new possibility on her own.
• When listening as a coach, the goal is first and foremost to truly understand the perspective of your coachee.?Unless you put yourself squarely in their mind and experience you can’t contribute anything useful. This means more than parroting it back, it means really getting at the underlying assumptions, beliefs or interpretations that color that individual’s perception and experience.
• You cannot coach without the cooperation, permission and commitment of a coachee.?The only value a coach has comes from the trust placed in her by those she coaches. A reluctant, un-trusting, suspicious or forced coachee will not succeed. Don’t foist coaching on anyone, or accept coaching assignments unless the individual is willing.
• And this includes coaching your direct reports. Ask “may I give you some coaching?”, and get an answer before proceeding. Or, simply give instruction or advice. No permission needed for a manager to do that.
• Spend as much energy as possible checking in with your coachee on their goals and experience in the process of accomplishing it.?If they feel thwarted and like they are not making progress, that’s what counts. If there is incontrovertible evidence that they have made progress, then the coaching subject matter may be that perception rather than the goal. Listen keenly.
• Offer to provide accountability when something emerges through the coaching that could benefit from it.?For example, if your coachee wants to change a behavior or stop a non-beneficial habit, offer a support structure or check-in practice. Again, offer, don’t demand.
• True yourself up against the most powerful possibilities you can imagine for those you coach.?Speak to them as the person or leader they are committed to being.?As coaches, one of our greatest powers is the ability to embrace a massive vision of those we coach. That provides the space for them to step into that reality.

If you practice these skills and use them to develop yourself as a coach, those you coach should make strides in their own goals. When they do, they will tell you if you are effective.

It’s useful to view your coaching as something that you continually “practice” like a musician practices his instrument. You are never done honing your skills and always need to go back to the basics.

Almost all great coaches have great coaches themselves. Are you interested in getting a coach for yourself or your team? Schedule a call with me.