What makes a good manager?

What makes a good manager?

Are you the type of person that can manage multiple projects? Wear multiple hats? Work well under pressure? Nurture meaningful relationships? Build a strategy and execute on it? Coach and train staff? Develop and grow business? Initiate difficult conversations??

This list can go on.

Simply, being a manager requires responsibility, commitment, and discipline.

As I entered the corporate world I would hear people say that they would like to be a manager by 25 or 30 years old.

Becoming a manager was like a rite of passage, right? You've finally made it when you get the MANAGER TITLE.

Wrong.?

It does not come that easily. A change in title does not automatically make you an effective manager. Nor do you require a manager title to have management responsibilities.

We are all managers of our own careers, jobs, and lives.

Regardless if you are currently a manager and are struggling to find the balance of doing your own work and delegating, or you are working with a manager that seems to be always busy and under water, you are not alone.

When I first became a manager I was excited to take on new responsibilities. I read books, asked for help, did additional training, but still felt like I was under prepared to be an effective manager.

I questioned if I was meant to be a manager or if I was just destined to fail.?

So what makes a good manager?

The most understated skill for managers is LISTENING.

LISTEN TO YOURSELF

We have to start by listening to ourselves. You know that voice inside your head? How often do you pause to take notice of what you are saying to yourself? Do you notice if you are thinking negatively or positively?

We can often get caught up with overthinking and overanalyzing. This leads to feelings of frustration, anger, and stress.

Start your work day by reserving time to clear your mind and listen to your inner voice. Ask yourself a few intentional questions:

• What is most important for me to prioritize today?
• Where is my strongest source of stress right now?
• Who can I help and who can help me today?
• What can I do right now to make today great?

Jot down a few notes. When we pause to listen to ourselves, we can cut out the overthinking and stay focused at our tasks at hand.

Managers who listen to themselves are stronger in self-management and can work more intentionally and productively, communicate their needs and directions more effectively, and know when to take breaks and put in effort.

A manager who listens to themselves have the capacity to listen to others.

HOLDING SPACE TO LISTEN

How accessible are you as a manager? Are you always available for your team or clients/customers? Do you hold space for strategizing, questions, or socialization?

You don't want to know how often I hear people complain that "my manager is too busy for me."

This can go in a few directions.

• Managers being too busy with their own work so they do not prioritize their teams.
• Team members assuming that their managers are too busy for them.

What is the problem here?

LACK OF SPACE TO COMMUNICATE

How to hold space:

• Set up recurring meetings with key contacts (daily/weekly/bi-weekly/monthly/semi-monthly). Determine the cadence based on the degree of collaboration or integration with your team member
• Be intentional about how to use time in a conversation. Is it for planning, problem solving, socializing, negotiating salary, asking for time off? Both as a manager or a subordinate, we need to clearly define the topic of the conversation
• Just ask. If you have been meaning to speak with your manager or team member, but have been hesitant to make the ask, JUST ASK. Remember that you are on the same team at the end of the day.
• Have the conversation in a setting that works for you. Salary negotiation in the lunch room? Maybe not.

Managers who hold space for conversations can be more transparent on priorities, tasks, and working styles. Building trust is key.

LISTEN WITH EMPATHY AND WITHOUT JUDGEMENT

Listening without judgement goes a long way. We are all human. We have our own challenges. We cannot assume we know how others feel and think.

Listening without judgement is holding ourselves back from giving advice, recommendations, our opinions, and instead, offering an ear for the other person to be heard. This creates psychological safety.

If they ask for specific advice, you can give it. If not, your advice can be dismissed or ignored.

We need to use our senses to understand how to show up for others. If it's a typical progress/task related interaction, we may not have to practice empathetic listening as deeply, however if a more sensitive topic gets brought up, especially when space is already held, there is opportunity to put this to practice.

This goes both ways as a manager and as a subordinate. We are all human and we all deserve to be heard.

Thanks for reading!

What other management practices can you recommend?