What I've Learned This Year

2020 has been a tumultuous year for so many reasons and for almost everyone. Like all of us, at this time last year I of course had no idea about what the next 12 months was to bring. And whilst this year has brought with it global devastation, it has brought me a whole lot more.

In December 2019 I was coming to the end of my gardening leave, and although there were a few "rods in the fire", I was beginning to feel a little helpless - panicked if I am being honest - about what the future would hold for me. Roles at my level of seniority and in my field of specialism don't come about all that often. At home we started having discussions about how we might downsize, perhaps even move out of Sydney if we were reduced to one income and could no longer afford to live here.

For goodness sake we even talked about moving in with my mother!

By the end of January 2020, we were now all accustomed to the thick and pervasive bushfire smoke that seemed to constantly hang in the air. Some of us were wearing face masks at that point, but for entirely different reasons.

We also watched with curiosity the continuing events in Wuhan. Watching an entire city go into lockdown, and watching with wonder at the videos which showed ingenious Wuhan residents coming up with creative ways to have pizza delivered, "contact free". Little did we know.

Personally, my sense of panic and urgency was sky rocketing. I probably wouldn't have shared that detail with you this time last year, but throughout 2020 one of the things I have loved about the experience is that it has been a shared experience. It has brought strangers closer together; we have shared tears, we have shared celebrations (even if only virtually), and we have shared our vulnerabilities. So I am sharing these things with you now, with no sense of shame or fear because I know that so many people have felt exactly the same way, and still do.

Our shared experiences have made us stronger - not weaker - and have broken down some long-standing taboos including being more comfortable in our vulnerability.

I wasn't sleeping well. I wasn't eating well. I wasn't coping well generally. I was putting on a brave face for the rest of the world but my partner and my family were becoming increasingly concerned. And so was I.

I was falling apart and I had contemplated a host of different solutions, but fortunately one of those solutions was talking to my GP and a very good friend.

As January stretched into February, almost in the blink of an eye, we were welcoming March.

Then things suddenly got a whole lot better.

I got a 12 month contract in the hospitality industry, and for the first time in months there were two incomes again. There was an almost visceral sense of welcome relief when I put on "work" clothes again and headed out to an actual office for the first time in eight months. New people to meet, new processes to learn, a new corporate culture to get my head around. It was thrilling.

And then Australia went into lockdown.

The clubs, pubs, and restaurants closed. And two weeks into my shiny new gig, my contract ended. I didn't even get to bill them for the second week of work. The week after that, my partner was told they'd be taking a 30% pay cut until the end of 2021. Moving in with my mother seemed pretty real at that point.

I'm often asked why I created Project Displaced. The simple answer is that at that moment, the moment when my world fell apart again, it was the only thing I could think of to help people. I realised that I was in a fortunate position: I had been through career trauma before, including two redundancies. I figured that I might know something (albeit not much) about what so many people in my network were about to go through, so maybe there was something I could do to help those who hadn't been through it before.

And this is the story of what happened next. Or at least, what I learned from what happened next.

I know that the story I tell here is one of positivity for me but I hope that in sharing some of my struggles and pain (some of which continues, still) it can provide some surety that there is light at the end of the tunnel for those whose year tells a different story.

If you need urgent help, please - I implore you - reach out to Lifeline, Beyond Blue, or the Black Dog Institute. They're terrific people who listen without judgement and can absolutely help you.

So what did I learn this year?

There Are Amazing People in This World

I've had hundreds of conversations with people all over the world this year. Of the 90+ people who have volunteered with Project Displaced in the 9 months that we have existed, I only knew 5 of them before I started this, and have still only met about ten of them in person. Everyone else has joined because they believe in what we are trying to do. They've come from word-of-mouth, from my extended network, and primarily from LinkedIn.

I also reached out to people in my network whom I had met with in my former professional life and I was humbled when they took my call, or when we met (despite everyone having Zoom fatigue). They believe in what we are doing and some of them have gone out of their way to make introductions for me, to extend our reach, and to support us however they can.

There are people whom were just casual acquaintances prior to 2020 who I would now count as genuine friends.

I cannot adequately thank each and every one of them for what they have brought to my life this year, and to those people right across Australia that we help.

I also want to especially thank the people who saved me this year. There are too many of you to name but I want to say publicly (or to at least the five people who may read this post) that without you I would not be here. Thank you. You do not truly know what you did for me.

I Have Changed My Relationship With Sleep, Food, and Exercise

The last two years have not been fun. I had a stressful job, which whilst it did have some wonderful elements, overall it was terrible for my physical and mental health. The psychological damage it caused was something I have only really begun to understand properly this year and it's going to still take me a little longer to fully recover from.

I used sleep as an escape from that stress but it was my only reprieve. And I'd wake up each morning un-rested, miserable, and devastated that I had to go back to my job and do it all again.

I was using food as medication (not hard to do when your job involves constant entertaining), and although I enjoy a drink, thankfully I didn't develop a dependency for alcohol at the same time. I tried to get back into the gym but failed miserable, my body was giving up (at one point I found it painful to even walk to work). I was pre-diabetic, had sky rocketing cholesterol, and my bloods generally were all over the place. I really was at serious risk.

But this year changed all that.

I still work 16 hours a day (in-fact my partner has to pull me away from the laptop) but I enjoy almost every single minute because I am working with passion and purpose.

Sleep is restful and restorative. I wake up energised and anticipating the day ahead (with only a small amount of anxiety which is part of the hangups from the last 2 years that I still need to work through mentally) and I gave up alcohol completely for the first 6 months of this year.

With the help of a dietician and my GP I've lost 35kg. I eat better, have much smaller portions and am conscious of what I consume (although I don't deprive myself of anything) and I'm back at the gym. My bloods are normal, my cholesterol is way better than the average man my age, and diabetes isn't even a consideration anymore.

I Can't Do Everything

I really struggled with this. Someone clever told me it's called "Founder's Syndrome"; the desire to retain control over everything and prove that you can do everything. The reality is, you can't.

That's possibly the hardest lesson to accept this year. I'm still not perfect and I still have a way to go. But I'm getting better. I have accepted that I simply can't help people if I am unable (or unwilling) to ask for help myself. Whether that's help with my well-being or with my business, it doesn't matter.

I need help and upon reflection, when I took a good look around me, there were literally dozens of people putting up their hand to help me! So not only would it be foolish to refuse them, it'd be down right rude!

So again, it is with the deepest of sincerity and gratitude that I thank all of the people who have helped me this year. May you continue to be the energy that drives me, and the extra arms that carry me.

Never Meet Your Heroes

Well, not quite. I have in my career met quite a number of high profile people - or reached out to a number who I knew quite well through my previous roles - and despite my desperately wanting it to be different, they re-affirmed some pretty average stereotypes.

The main one being whilst they were happy to be my friend when I was useful to them (hotel rooms, paid sponsorships, media to boost their own profile, entertainment etc.) they were largely and noticeably silent when I asked for assistance in getting our message out so that more unemployed people in Australia knew we existed.

There are others, too, who have created initiatives during the pandemic which are to the outside world incredible acts of altruism but are in reality perhaps something quite different. I reached out to them, too.

Look, I'm not going to single out or shame anyone (because quite frankly I can't afford the defamation suit lol). Everyone has the right to make a buck and that's fine. But one day, if we are in a position to have paid endorsements and commercial partnerships I will absolutely remember who helped when I was funding this thing out of my dwindling savings, and those that couldn't even manage a polite reply.

I Took a Pay Cut - and Loved It

This one has blown me away, and may in fact be my biggest learning.

I had very much grown accustomed over the years to my title, the size of my role, the team I led, the reputation of the organisation I worked for and yes, my salary and benefits, etc. But when that is stripped away from you without notice (combined my partner and I took a 60% cut this year), you do learn to appreciate what actually matters.

For full disclosure; I did get a day job in the middle of the year that pays the bills, thank goodness! A fair amount of what comes in, goes straight back out to Project Displaced. Even with that job, I've taken a step down from the seniority of my previous roles and salary, obviously.

But I work with an absolute amazing bunch of people who know what I do outside of work hours, and allow me to focus on that in my professional profile. They trust that I do a good job for them and they know that every minute on their clock is spent focussed on them. I am beyond happy to be a part of an organisation that has stellar internal engagement and a culture that should be the envy of every other major corporate in this country, and to work with a leader and leadership team that inspire me every day.

But at 5:30pm I clock-off from that job and clock on to Project Displaced for the rest of the night, and the fact that I have a job which allows to me to do that is insane. I cannot remember a job in the last ten years that actually finished at the close of business! Sure, there are times when I work late on the day job, but that's the exception not the rule.

I work from 6am to 8:30am and then again from 7pm to midnight and all weekend on Project Displaced; in an industry that I have no background in! it has opened my mind to entirely new ways of thinking, to new people, to new challenges. And I love every minute of it. Because not only am I learning constantly (suddenly I am the finance, IT, marketing, HR, and ops department!), but because we get to help people who are really struggling out there.

Despite the challenges - and there are lots, don't get me wrong - when I get an email from a job seeker telling me how much our service did for them, how much it has helped their state of mind, how much it has helped their marriage, kids, and mindset.. it makes everything worth it!

I discovered my two greatest fears in life

Fear one: That I am not helping enough people.

There are approximately 900,000 unemployed people in Australia according to the latest ABS data. We have capacity to help around 2,000 a month. Somewhere between the two is what I call "enough".

I am not sure what "enough" looks like just yet but I know that we don't currently reach anywhere near what that amount is.

Which is why I am constantly posting, constantly looking for opportunities, sponsors, ambassadors, anyone who will listen and share our service so that we can get to more people who need us!

Fear two: That I am not helping or recognising the people inside Project Displaced enough.

Everyone who works with us does so in their own time and on their own dime. I pay for the systems that we need to run the show, the marketing and insurance, but the expertise comes from the coaches and everyone working behind the scenes to help me, including my amazing and supportive Board. They give anything from an hour a week to every hour of every day (really) and my fear is that they don't know just how grateful I am for what they do.

I commit to doing even more in 2021 to make sure they do know that they're valued, that their belief in our mission and purpose means something, and that I am grateful for every thing they each do.

Summary

This year was not what any of us expected and despite the significant challenges, the fear, the anxiety and the unknown, it has taught me so many things. More than I have listed here to be honest, but these were the main ones I wanted to highlight.

Everyone deals with having their careers displaced in different ways. It's a continuum just like the cycle of grief is. And I remain committed, more than ever, to ensuring that Project Displaced is here for the long term. In 2021 our biggest objective is to receive our ACNC registration and secure the funding that we need to ensure that we are sustainable and around for the long-term. As JobKeeper and JobSeeker reduce and become more restrictive from as soon as tomorrow, I know that the need for our service is more vital than ever.

If you've stuck around to read to this point may I take this opportunity to wish you and yours a healthy, safe, and prosperous New Year. May 2021 bring you everything that you may wish for, and more.

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Anthony Cohen is the Founder and CEO of Project Displaced, Australia's first not-for-profit employment social cause created directly because of the COVID-19 pandemic. They provide free one-on-one career and mindset coaching for anyone across Australia who is unemployed and faces financial distress because of that.

Project Displaced is registered as a not for profit company with ASIC and is currently awaiting a decision by the ACNC for DGR status.

?If you want to join as a volunteer or support Project Displaced (in-kind or otherwise) please visit us and get involved.