What I've learned from Rebecca Welton in Ted Lasso show about mastering messiness

I just finished watching all 3 seasons of the Apple TV+ comedy series Ted Lasso! This is not only a hilarious and heartwarming show about an American football coach who moved to London to manage a struggling soccer team. It is also full of wisdom in how to grow as a person and a leader. It teaches us how to master messiness with belief, curiosity, vulnerability, humor, and kindness. As Ted says: “The happiest animal in all the world is a goldfish. You know why? Got a 10-second memory.” We can all learn from that! ?

There are many brilliant quotes from the show. I enjoyed reading this CNN article by Dan Heching which had a great summary of some of the most insightful lines:?

1. “Success is not about the wins and losses. It’s about helping these young fellas be the best versions of themselves on and off the field”?
2. “Taking on a challenge is a lot like riding a horse, isn’t it? If you are comfortable while you’re doing it, you’re probably doing it wrong.”?
3. "You say impossible, but all I hear is ‘I’m possible’ “?
4. Make whatever your passion is your “life”?
5. “Don’t you dare settle for fine!”?
6. Make sure you have your own “Diamond Dogs” - creating a stable forum for sharing and support among friends?
7. “If you just figure out some way to turn that ‘me’ into ‘us’ … the sky’s the limit for you.”?
8. “Unless you make thoughtful amends, you will stink forever.” ?
9. Breathe through a panic attack?
10. “I hope that either all of us, or none of us, are judged by the actions of our weakest moments, but rather the strength we show when and if we’re ever given a second chance.”?

Who is Rebecca Welton? ?

Besides Ted Lasso , one character that inspired me with her strength, courage and growth is Rebecca Welton! She is the owner of the struggling football club and Ted’s boss in the show. She is played by the talented Hannah Waddingham, who won an Emmy and two Critics’ Choice awards for her stunning performance.

She is a complex and fascinating character who goes through a lot of changes and challenges in her personal and professional life. Rebecca is not perfect, just like all of us. She makes mistakes. She struggles with her insecurities. She faces conflicts with her family and ex-husband. She is messy, just like all of us. But she learns from her messiness and grows as a person and a leader. ?

Here are some of the lessons I’ve learned from Rebecca Welton about mastering messiness in our career and life. ?

Lesson 1: Be honest and vulnerable?

Rebecca starts off as a cold and distant boss who wants to sabotage the team to get back at her ex. She eventually realized that her dishonesty was hurting herself and others, and that she needed to face the truth and take responsibility for her actions. She admits her mistakes, apologizes for her actions, and asks for forgiveness. ?

Honesty also means being true to yourself, and acknowledging your feelings and needs. Rebecca often tried to hide or suppress her emotions, such as anger, sadness, or loneliness. She put on a brave face and acts like everything is fine, even when it’s not. She also denied herself the opportunity to pursue happiness or love, because she was afraid of getting hurt again or she thought she doesn’t deserve it. ?

However, with the help of many, Rebecca learned to embrace her vulnerability and express her feelings more openly. She shared her fears, insecurities, and hopes with others, and learned to listen to her heart and follow her dreams. By being honest and vulnerable, she built trust and rapport with her team, her friends, and her fans. She also learned to forgive herself and others, and to move on from the past. She showed us that being honest and vulnerable is not a sign of weakness, but of strength and courage.?

"I'm not perfect. I'm a mess. But I'm a hot mess. And I'm trying to be a better person every day.” - Rebecca Welton ?

This lesson teaches us that we can't master messiness if we are not honest with ourselves and others. Being honest and vulnerable is not easy, especially when we have done something wrong or hurtful. But it is the only way to heal ourselves and our relationships. By being honest and vulnerable, we show our humanity, humility, and courage. We also invite others to empathize with us, trust us, and support us. ?Being honest and vulnerable means being authentic and it certainly takes courage. It means being willing to show our true selves, our flaws, and our feelings, even when it is hard or scary. It also means being accountable and responsible for our actions, and to seek forgiveness when we hurt others. This can help us to foster connections, and to heal from pain.

Lesson 2: Be open to new perspectives?

One of the most challenging things for Rebecca was to accept Ted Lasso, the optimistic and unconventional American coach she hired to sabotage her team. She initially dismissed him as a clueless and annoying outsider with a lack of experience and qualifications. But as the season progressed, she realized that he had a unique way of motivating and inspiring people, and that he genuinely cared about her and the team. He challenges her to see things differently, to be more compassionate, and to have more fun. He also helps her to heal from her divorce and to find love again. Rebecca learned to appreciate Ted’s perspective and even adopted some of his practices, such as the "Believe" sign and the biscuit ritual. She was willing to listen to different opinions, try new things, and challenge her own assumptions. She showed us that being open to new perspectives is not a sign of indecision, but of curiosity and growth.??

"Every disadvantage has its advantage." - Rebecca Welton ?

This lesson teaches us that we can benefit from being open to new perspectives, being willing to learn from others, especially those who are different from us. It also means being humble enough to admit when we are wrong, and to change our minds when we are presented with new information. We might be tempted to stick to our comfort zone and resist change, but we might miss out on valuable insights and opportunities. By being curious and respectful of others, we learn from their experiences and perspectives, and find new ways to solve problems and achieve our goals. By being open to new perspectives, we expand our horizons, enrich our experiences, and discover new possibilities. It also means being able to see the positive side of any situation or challenge. ?

Lesson 3: Be bold and courageous?

Rebecca had been living in the shadow of her ex-husband who had cheated on her and belittled her. She had also been intimidated by the media, who had criticized her appearance and her decisions. She had lost her confidence and her voice and felt powerless and insecure. But she gradually regained her courage and assertiveness and stood up for herself and her team. She confronted her ex-husband. She defended Ted and the team from the media, and she expressed her opinions and desires without fear or shame. She also learned to overcome her fears and doubts, and to embrace her power and potential.?

Rebecca is a visionary leader, who has a sharp vision for the future of the club. She consults with her diverse team to make informed decisions. She is not afraid to take risks, to try new things, to make changes, to challenge the status quo, and stand up for what she believes in. By being bold and courageous, she creates impact and inspires others. She showed us that being bold and courageous is not a sign of recklessness, but of confidence and passion. ?

"I'm not here to play it safe. I'm here to make a difference. And sometimes that means taking a leap of faith."?- Rebecca Welton

This lesson teaches us that we can master messiness if we are bold, courageous and have faith in ourselves and others. We might face situations or people that make us feel scared or insecure, but we can overcome them if we believe in ourselves and our values, speak up and act on our behalf, and protect our interests and boundaries. Being bold also means being willing to experiment, to innovate, to challenge the status quo and to explore new possibilities. Being a courageous leader means supporting and empowering others who are facing similar challenges and creates a positive environment. ?

Lesson 4: Be supportive and empowering?

Rebecca is a powerful woman who runs a football club in a male-dominated industry. She faces a lot of sexism and criticism from the media, the fans, and even her ex-husband. She also must deal with the pressure and expectations of being a successful leader and role model. ?

Rebecca is not only a leader, but also a mentor, a friend, and a cheerleader. She knows how hard it is to be a woman in a patriarchal society, and she uses her position and influence to support and empower other women. She showed us the impact of?being supportive and empowering with generosity and kindness. She mentors Keeley, who becomes her best friend and the club’s brand consultant. She encourages her to pursue her career goals and to stand up for herself. She also supports Nora, her goddaughter, who is a smart and ambitious teenager. She helps her with her school project and invites her to accompany her to work and join her for meetings. ?

Rebecca also supports and empowers the men in her life, especially Ted and the players. She supports Ted through his divorce and panic attacks. She gives her team the resources and the freedom they need to do their jobs well. She also praises them for their achievements and comforts them when they fail. She treats them with respect and kindness and shows them that she cares about them as people, not just as employees. ??

"I'm not here to compete with you. I'm here to support you. And I hope you'll do the same for me." ?- Rebecca Welton

This lesson teaches us that we can master messiness by being?supportive and empowering. We are not alone in our struggles, and?we can find allies and friends in unexpected places. By lifting others up, we can also lift ourselves up. By giving others the opportunity to grow and shine, we can also grow and shine ourselves. By being generous and compassionate, we can also be confident and resilient.?

Lesson 5. Be adventurous and fun?

Rebecca Welton takes her job and responsibilities seriously. She is often stressed and tense. However, as the show progresses, she learns to be more flexible and fun, and to enjoy the moment. She learns to let go of her rigid expectations, and to embrace the uncertainty and the chaos. She also learns to have fun, and to laugh at herself. She shows that being flexible and fun is not only about relaxing, but also about being creative, spontaneous, and adventurous. ?

“Oh, I'm having the time of my life. You?" - Rebecca Welton?

This lesson teaches us that we can master messiness by being adventures and fun. It helps us relieve stress and to express and create. It enables us to boost our mood and energy, and?to explore and discover new experiences and opportunities. Through?joyful experiences, we bond with others, and co-create memorable moments and stories in our life journeys. ?

Summary?

Rebecca Welton is a remarkable character who shows us that messiness is inevitable and unavoidable, but also manageable and rewarding. I've learned from Rebecca that we can learn from our mistakes, grow from our challenges, and find joy and meaning in our journey. We can master messiness if we are open to new perspectives, honest with ourselves and others, and courageous and assertive.?Mastering messiness is not a solo journey, but a collaborative one. Messiness can be beautiful, and that we can all be better because of it! ?

What stories and wisdom from Rebecca and the Ted Lasso show have also inspired you? What stories, reflections and insights come into your mind when you read this? I'd love to hear your thoughts!?