What I've Learned from a Career Time-Out

I've always been keenly aware of what one is "supposed" to do in life. As the eldest child of three, raised by baby boomers - a millennial, but barely - I grew up learning many old-school philosophies: You're supposed to go to college. You're supposed to send thank you notes for, well, a myriad of things. And you're supposed to have a job lined up before you quit your current job...

Well, college worked for me, and I believe strongly in writing thank you notes - but this past spring, I chose to leave my job without having secured a new one. It was a crazy feeling: it felt akin to the classic movie scenario of walking into an old-timey saloon and having the music immediately stop and all eyes turn to stare at you.

You see, in the 13+ years I've been a working adult, the professional rules have certainly shifted and evolved (job-hopping is okay now, interview attire is no longer a full suit for most industries, etc) - but somehow this one is still held fairly sacred. Even at the trendy, progressive company I was working for - when I told people I was leaving, the without-fail-response was always: "Where are you heading?" ...No one was expecting me to reply with a mysterious smile and say "I don't know!"

I should be clear: it was not a decision I made lightly or easily. Even though I had built up my savings for such a purpose - it was incredibly scary, and I agonized over it for months before pulling the trigger. But it was time. I'd stopped thriving in the role I was leaving, and it was time for a change. Every professional step I've taken throughout my career has been an improvement on the one before, and so, though it was a good situation I was leaving - I just knew a better situation for me was out there, and I wanted to be ready for it - which for me, meant needing time to unplug and recharge.

As I now begin my hunt for the next step, I want to reflect on everything I've learned so far in my downtime:

Saving money is an incredible gift to yourself.

I remember living paycheck to paycheck in my early twenties, and I keenly remember when I finally started being able to build savings. For the first time, I started to enjoy all things financial: making spreadsheets to track my spending (there were less apps for that back then - remember, I'm an "old" millennial), researching interest earning account options, picking credit cards based on merits related to my specific lifestyle, etc. Even just the action of checking my account balances became exciting - to see savings build is a very satisfying thing. Fast forward to my thirties: getting married, buying a condo, and now being able to take months off from work? I see that every sacrifice I've made in order to save money has been worth it. And maybe sacrifice isn't the right word - prioritization is better. What things are worth your money? What things aren't? The answer is different for everyone. And how you'll use your savings will be different for everyone, too. For me, this time off has been a needed investment in myself and my mental health - and I am incredibly grateful for it.

Being well-rested is a super power.

You know how most people grow out of their night owl phase after college? I never did. My creative brain wakes up when the sun goes down, so even when I try to go to bed early - it usually doesn't work because my thoughts keep me up late. So while I can wake up for early mornings when I need to, I've basically been sleep deprived since the day I joined Corporate America. (New parents everywhere are rolling their eyes at me right now, I realize; props to the truly sleep deprived people out there making it happen every day). While on my current sabbatical, though, I've been able to get 8 hours of sleep every night on my own time table for months in a row. How that feels? INDESCRIBABLE. My brain works better, I feel better... No wonder early-to-bed-folks are successful - they're well rested! I will have to figure out how to maintain this wherever my next professional step takes me.

There is never enough time, even when you're not working.

Chances are, you knew this one already. From teachers who get the summers off, to stay at home parents, to people like me taking some time off (and to, basically, everyone else also) - time flies, doesn't it? For me, I had a number of goals of how I'd use my time off: I wanted to declutter my home (a daunting task, as I'm a sentimentalist), amp-up my volunteer work (I am the President of the Associate Board for the Chicago Coalition for the Homeless - and a supporter of many other admirable causes, too), interview and spend time with entrepreneurs and creatives to widen my horizons for my next steps, work on my marriage (because it's not the walk in the park that social media pictures make it out to be), and of course, continue working on me (I have always been a believer in therapy and self-care). I thought three months or so would be enough for all that - and here we are five months in, and I'm only finally now making tangible progress on most of those items. What this tells me is that a) you can't force important things into a timeline - and b) my body and my brain truly needed this time. One of the entrepreneurs I caught up with recently, Cat Aldana of Eat Stretch Nap - put it in eloquent yogi terms, "You're basically in a life version of a Savasana right now." Exactly.

Entrepreneurs are electric to be around.

Chicago has some bad ass entrepreneurs living in it: people chasing their dreams and working hard to do so. While I may end up returning to Corporate America, I didn't want that to be a given - and knew I needed to surround myself with people exploring other paths to widen my horizons. Plus, I've always been obsessed with studying people who follow their bliss. Between using my membership at Soho House creatively (a members-only club for creatives) to simply being more bold in asking people for their time, I have spoken to some fascinating people over the past 5 months. Just a handful: Steven Dyme of Flowers for Dreams / Joslyn Villalpando of J.Villa Workshops / Jason Waldron of Waldron Brothers Woodworking / the aforementioned Cat Aldana of Eat Stretch Nap, and the list goes on. Not to mention some of the interviews I've taken - though they've not ended up being the right fit, did involve me interviewing with CEOs that started their companies - for which I have so much respect and consider it having been absolutely time well spent. When you speak to someone about something they created, the energy of the conversation is unlike anything else. They way they use their time is unlike anyone else... It is inspiring and so educational; I highly recommend doing it.

Interviews can be fun!

Many of the interviews I've gone on in my life have been intimidating and scary - and I've felt such fear of being judged as not enough. Though I still have work to do on that journey, it's been a wonderful part of growing older and becoming more comfortable with myself to have that go away slowly over time. That - and having a clear idea of what I do and do not want in my next opportunity - makes interviews so much less scary! In fact, they can even be fun when you approach them from a standpoint of curiosity. This advice is out there everywhere, but I will reiterate it: as a job-seeker, you should be interviewing them as much as they're interviewing you. Remind yourself of this often, because then, an interview is all about learning more of what you do and don't want - which makes every interview valuable, no matter the outcome of it.

...But the job-apply process still sucks.

This is well-known, too - but I don't know why that isn't changing things! The fact that so many companies still make you upload your resume and then type out line-by-line all your work experience (resulting in 30 minute job applications) is incomprehensible. The fact that most companies are willing to learn everything about you, but then not give you feedback for your growth when they reject you? Maddening. Even worse, that some companies don't even tell you you didn't get the job? They just "ghost" you (to use a fun slang term that SHOULD only be appropriate in the dating world - but sadly is also appropriate here)... Disrespectful. As the job market has changed, it is sad to see how many companies have not evolved with it - and I hope for their sakes they eventually do. The employee experience begins with the candidate experience. My heart goes out there to the other folks also on the hunt for the next step. It's the wild, wild west out there.

The world is good. And so is your network.

That was my one rant - overall, I'm impressed with the world around me during this time. There are people who will say yes to you, if you ask. The people who love you will help you how they can, if you ask. And there are good companies out there who will surprise you by being way more awesome than you expect. For every life pain and every disappointment, there can be growth that follows - if you allow it and embrace it. Changing your mindset changes everything.

~~~~~

On a final note, it's worth mentioning that I can be proud of all I have done to get myself where I am today - AND - that I can be aware that a certain amount of my situation is afforded to me by privilege that not everyone has. I look forward to the day that evens out in our country. We all deserve to thrive, and we all deserve to feel fulfilled in our life choices. Thank you to everyone who has supported me in mine, and wish me luck in finding the right next step for me!