What I've Learned From Annapurna

Back in 2013, I had just been through some challenging events in my life and decided that I needed a spiritual journey where I can step out and look at my life from a different perspective. I cannot really tell that I knew what the desired outcome of that journey was, but I knew that I needed to step away for a bit and reflect. In Simon Sinek’s words, I needed to find my “Why”..

Considering how highly influenced I was by rough nature growing up, mountainous terrains have always been my element for inspiration and reflection, an Emerson’s outlook if you will. I decided on a trek in the Himalayas, Annapurna Mountain to be specific, with minimum preparation, got my gear ready and headed out to what will turn out to be a life altering event for me.

While many may find that these reflections and lessons are basic, they have set the path for me to altering my perspective in life.

The trek was 10 days in total, in the midst of monsoon season. I needed a challenge, and a challenge I got. With nonstop pouring rain, I met with my trek guide Prem, a man I will never forget, and after a night in Kathmandu, we started the track at roughly 2000m. My mission was to finish the trek, no matter what. Equipped with determination, a positive mindset, an open mind to adventure and a focused vision on the feeling I will get once I finish this trek, we started making our way up the mountain.

BREAK IT DOWN

After two days of trekking, an average of eight hours per day up the mountain, pouring rain that resulted in several dangerous slips and a heavy backpack that seemed to get heavier by the day, I started to feel a pain in my knee after I hit it against a rock as a result of a slide, a pain which along the days increased to a point where I was unable to bend my knee anymore. By day four, blisters on my feet made me consciously aware of every step I take. Day five saw me using the trekking poles as crutches, soles of my feet bleeding, soaking wet and in pain, a back pain of what later turned out to be a disc hernia that surfaced during the trek. Needless to say, when it rains it pours, and in my case this was happening both literally and figuratively. 

I lost sight of what made me face this mountain and whatever spiritual outcome or sense of achievement I was supposed to have from it. Giving up and going back was a reasonable and tempting option each day, the consequences of such decision, however, will have defied every reason that pushed me to be on this mountain, I would have proved to myself that I am everything I wished to prove wrong by taking the Annapurna challenge.

I couldn’t make this situation get resolved in an instant. I was there; trekking up the mountain, regretting the decision to do this trek would give absolutely no resolution to my situation. I reasoned with my pain, sparred and debated. Some rounds I won, and some knocked me out. I visualized myself at the end of the trek. I needed to prove to myself that I am not someone who breaks and shatters when the storm hits hard. “I am resilient, I am strong” kept echoing in my mind.  Giving up was not an option. A strategy was needed..

 Overwhelmed with my physical pain, my only choice was to carry on , one step at a time. Thinking of what toll the rest of the trek will have on me, I decided to only think of the next step, nothing more. I was consciously aware of every step, thinking only of the next one. My challenge was broken down to small steps.

Suddenly, I was not as overwhelmed. With every step I took, I thought of the next one, not the hundreds I still have to make. I visualized my future self at the end of the trek, engulfed with feelings of achievement, resilience, and empowerment, calling to myself at that moment, asking me to keep at it. I held on to that image. 

When things get overwhelming, break them down, dismantle the problem and understand its components, take a look at the parts, rearrange them, play around with how they are connected to form a problem, and the solution becomes simpler. When it gets complicated, unfold it, when it gets complex, pause and understand it. With every step, my back up plan was planned stops where I can rest my knee, change into dryer socks, rest my back, and then move on. Thinking of risk back up helps with keeping the focus channeled on task at hand. Don’t take your steps without purpose; plan your back up strategy.

“SOMETIMES UP, SOMETIMES DOWN”

Along the trek, Prem would sometimes tell me, in a couple of hours we will have an hour or so of straight terrain. This meant less pressure on my knee and a break so to speak. I would look forward to it. Yet, I constantly found myself going through up hills then down only to reach another up hill again. When I asked Prem, he explained that straight stretches of land in Nepal are not necessary flat, it is “sometimes up , sometimes down” rather than only up. Although this sounded funny to me at first, I realized that you can’t expect life to hand you an easy path and look forward to it. Perspective is everything, and this changed mine. Set your mind to up and down terrain ahead, and make your peace with it. Look forward to the Nepali flat, not the smooth ride and learn to enjoy it, understand it is a

 beautiful experience and a crucial path in your journey, and not necessary an obstacle. If your perspective is channeled on looking forward to an easy life, then I fear you may hit a wall of disappointment. If our perspective is channeled on positively embracing whatever terrain life brings our path, a stronger, more resilient and more powerful you will emerge. Perspective is key for this, and nothing else prepares you better… Funny enough, the trek, became easier, more enjoyable…

The Sherpas

What took me and the rest of the trekkers who I met on the mountain during this trip eight hours, took the Sherpas two hours maximum. These incredibly humble and kind people would run up the mountain and down again in a breeze. I couldn’t help but be amazed. What resembled a great challenge for me, was a walk in the park for them.

They lived their lives on the mountain, went to schools everyday through its paths, rocky roads and hanging bridges before it became part of who they are. Their journey is different, their struggle is different. If you see someone you know going through life effortlessly, or achieved a certain level of “success”, this does not mean that they don’t have their own struggles. They have their journey and you have yours. Don’t compare your life with others. Rather, make effort to get to know other people’s journey and their struggle, even if you seem to be down the same path. The journeys, and the lessons, are different. Learn from others, get inspired. When you compare, you miss on lessons offered to you.

 Happiness?

During my trek, I kept contemplating about what it meant to be happy, and why I still struggle sometimes to feel happy, even though I had learned to appreciate what I have and embraced gratitude as a daily ritual. Something was missing…. Of all the unforgettable moments I had on that mountain, the amazing people I met and the inspiring conversations I had, the funny moments and the painful ones, one stands true to have carved its way into my existence, to change and alter my perspective on everything in my life. It was mid-day, rain had ceased, and fog set in. I decided to sit on one of the large rocks, overlooking a valley, and take some time to pause and meditate. I sat on that rock, trying to focus only on my breathing. It so happened that the fog set in and was moving quickly, and all at once, in one moment, I felt the fog gently on my face, the smell of the earth, the feel of the rock underneath me, the shy rays of sun and the clear crisp air surrounded me, embraced me and lifted me. I hadn’t remembered the last time I felt connected, and at that moment, I felt connected with everything around me. 

I was present; I was aware..

Why that moment? I felt a genuine feeling of happiness. It was constant, it was peaceful and it made perfect sense. I realized that if I don’t learn to connect, I am not present, and if I am not present, I am unaware of the reason behind things. 

I made a conscious decision to connect again. I noticed more the amazing rock formations that were on the mountain, and I loved them. I embraced every interaction with every person I met on the mountain with the desire to merely connect. I connected with the air, I connected with nature, with people and with the experience. I remember settling in one of the teahouses one night, with the owner telling me that his teahouse has no insects whatsoever. As I entered the room to set up my sleeping bag, I saw a huge spider, with yellow stripes, athletically hanging by one of his threads next to where I was setting up, and couldn’t help but laugh and connect with that moment as well. 

I connected with my pain, I understood that it is polishing me for more resilience. I began to find the connection behind everything. Connection was the missing ingredient for my happiness, and defined it for me ever since. I started to take things in more, and focused more on the effect my existence can have on what is around me. 

At work or in personal life, things may not make perfect sense. Instead of bitterness, why not connect? Why not learn the value of each simple task, and connect with it? Put value on whatever you do. Not everyone is lucky enough to be in a job they are passionate about, and that is ok. I believe that you don’t necessary need to be in the job you are passionate about to be happy and productive, what is necessary is to bring your passion with you to any task you do in any job or any task. There is no bigger motivation than deciding to be the best at what you do, regardless of task. This mindset is a sustainable motivational force by itself.

Wherever you are in your mountain trek, whatever stage you are in, if you want to change and you are unable to at the moment, find your connection first. Whatever you do, connect first. Find again the impact you can have on others, and don’t forget to take in the lessons life has to offer. These lessons will give more sense to life. Understand the impact you have on others, the energy you give to the universe, and that there is a bigger picture after all. Next time you go to work, make a decision to connect with people around you. Understand that whatever reactions or behaviors they display, are a result of their mountain at that time, and that maybe, just maybe their defining moment will manifest itself in kind word and a caring attitude that you show. If you focus more on the influence you can have on others, you will feel less likely to be a victim and more of a positive energy in this world, one of the elements that join together to create defining moments for others.. 

Happiness? Absolutely. It is not money. It is not a sense of security. It is connection and gratitude hand in hand, creating moments that give life sense and meaning, moments and memories to hold on to, whether you are on a Nepali flat, or simply taking one step at a time, on your mountain.

I finished the trek, and I look forward to my next mountain…