‘What If?’—A Tiny Phrase with a Huge Impact

Hey there—‘what if’ you don’t read on??

Seriously, ‘what if’ this post doesn’t get any likes? Or ‘what if’ you think I don’t know what I am talking about??

‘What if’ as a phrase sounds so harmless. Yet for many of us, these two words are more like a constant whisper, questioning everything about us.?

From my own experience, I've learned that these two words can open the floodgates to self-doubt and amplify stress. It’s a quick route to feeling overwhelmed, a spiral that can take hold before we even realise it.?

“What If” Drain?

I’ve wasted countless hours on “what if” thinking—replaying scenarios, rehearsing reasons or excuses even, crafting justifications, all to “prepare” for things that never happened. When we let ourselves fall into this pattern, it drains our time and energy while yielding nothing other than stress. What we need to be aware of:?

The Crystal Ball Trap?

“What if” questions are our mind’s attempt to predict the future, often with a negative slant. It’s like peering into a crystal ball, hoping we can “mentally prepare” for every outcome. But when was the last time you predicted correctly or even ask “What if it works? What if the client loves it?” We rarely predict the future and even more rarely focus on positive possibilities, even though they’re just as likely!?

When Fear Takes Control?

Ever notice how the “What if” cycle taps into our deepest fears? “What if I lose this client? What if next year’s opportunities dry up? Will everyone think I’m a failure?”?

These questions often reveal hidden doubts, a subtle but constant fear of things going wrong. But what if, instead of getting caught in the cycle of “What ifs,” you took a moment to examine just how much fear is in control??

Imagine the difference: shifting from worry to awareness. How might things change if you focused on what you can control, rather than letting fear drive your choices??

When “What If” Turns Into Drama?

Once we let “what ifs” run wild, they tend to spiral quickly—creating drama, catastrophising, and sparking more irrational thoughts. A small concern becomes worry, then stress, escalating anxiety and blocking our ability to think clearly.?

But what if we could pause and redirect those thoughts before the drama takes over? Imagine the clarity and calm that could follow.?

How to Tame the “What If” Thinking?

Simple Tips to Shift Away from Negative “What If” Thoughts?

1. Flip the Script: Reframe negative “what ifs” with positive possibilities. Instead of “What if I fail?” ask, “What if I succeed?” This helps break the cycle of negativity.?

1. Drain or Empower: Pay attention to your thinking. Identify which thoughts empower you and which drain your energy. This awareness can help you catch negative spirals before they escalate.?

1. Catch Avoidance in Action: Notice if “what if” thinking leads to avoidance. Do you skip tasks or avoid people because of these thoughts? Recognising avoidance is key to breaking the cycle and fostering healthier responses.?

Try This: The Post-It Note Challenge - Yes Homework!?

Grab some sticky notes! Whenever a “what if” question pops up, write it down and stick it in a drawer or box. After a few days, review them to see if any patterns emerge. What fears do these thoughts reveal? This exercise helps you identify your biggest “what if” triggers.?

Join My Resilience in Life & Leadership Webinars?

Looking for more ways to boost your resilience and balance ambition with well-being? My Resilience webinars are perfect for professionals like you who are eager for growth and success but sometimes hold themselves back. Join me and learn actionable techniques to thrive without sacrificing energy, time, or peace of mind.?

My name is Asha Ghosh, and I coach leaders to find out how they can thrive and be impactful and find new ways to succeed whilst having clear boundaries with their team, their home life and most importantly their wellbeing.

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