What I Learnt in 2020...

Where has this year gone? We started the year so positive, so optimistic… and then… went into one lockdown, then out… then another… out again… in again… or was it just a tier system? And now, we end 2020 with… well, you guessed it… a lockdown. Probably a fitting end to what has been a challenging year to say the least.

“What you normally get over a span of five years, life decided to throw at us in 2020…”, is how one of my friends described it aptly. And needless to say, it was an eye opener. 

Having started this ‘what I learnt’ series in 2018, and getting some positive feedback, I’ve decided to continue the trend, and all things being equal, hope to put one out every year going forward. If not for the positive acclaim (come now, we all love that), then just a chance to sit back and reflect on the year gone by and the lessons I’ve really taken away from it.

For a year like 2020, I could write an entire book. Gosh, where do I even start? I however decided to pick my top five lessons for this year and reflect on those. So here goes:

You can teach an old dog new tricks – I guess it really depends on the dog, but I assure you, you can. People will often tell you why you can’t do something (it’s human nature to do so) – why you’re not right for a role; why you shouldn’t even try something. But… if you are willing to give it a go, if you are willing to learn, then there is no stopping you. This year, I started a job in an entirely new industry; I set up two businesses; I contributed to a book; I was let go from one job and had to find another… landed another new role in an area I was entirely new to as well. But, I am willing to adjust, willing to adapt… and well, this old dog is still willing to learn some new tricks because I know life has a lot to offer. And I know it is this adaptability, this willingness to learn that has kept me afloat all these years and more so in 2020.

My dad often told me, if you don’t ask, you don’t get. I sort of learnt this first hand this year, in a positive and a negative sense. When I negotiated one contract, I didn’t ask for certain things and relied on good faith – well, rookie mistake. That was on me! Following my redundancy earlier in the year, I had to scramble to look for a new role. I reached out to people far and wide; people I hadn’t spoken to in ages; people who I would not even call acquaintances. â€œAre you comfortable doing that?”, I was asked. â€œI need the job. And in this case, if I don’t ask, I won’t get. So even if I am not comfortable, I am going to have to suck it up and just do it!”, was my response. Sure enough, while chatting with a close friend, we came to know there was an opening for a role she was aware of. I asked for a reference and for my name to be put forward… and a few interviews and months down the line, I was seated in this new role. Had I not taken the step to ask, to put my name forward, I may not have been here today and life would be different.

Money is not everything… but it matters. There is more to life than money. Happiness, joy, family, friends, health… yes, health... they all matter. But it's probably a cliché to say that money doesn’t matter as much when there is a steady pay check coming in and you’re not having to struggle through life to make ends meet, to sustain a degree of ‘normalcy’. But it does matter. You don’t need boatloads of it… you don’t need Jeff Bezos’ Billions (or is it trillions now?) worth of wealth…. But you do need enough. I realised the importance of it this year, after I was made redundant from my first start-up job. The pain and embarrassment of being let go was one set of negative emotions, of course; but more than that it was the worry about a pay check, about keeping the bills paid, healthcare costs, the family happy and food on the table that kept me up at night. [If I were a CEO, I wish someone would one day ask me that ‘what keeps you up at night’ question one day.]

If 2020 has taught us anything collectively, then it is that we as a species are one resilient bunch. No matter what life throws at us, we just take it all in stride, pick ourselves up and move on. It is tougher for some than it is for others, but somehow we find a way to keep calm and carry on (well, maybe not everyone is all that calm always).  Job lost – it hurts, but let’s pick ourselves up and look for a new one; loved one lost – that is devastating, but we must move on; new lockdown – for F%(ï¿¡*ï¿¡% sake! Give me a mask and let’s get on with it. What else you got COVID…?

If you want to learn about resilience, just look at the young kids around us who, during the course of this year had to transition from the normalcy of every day school life – of meeting friends, interacting with people in person, to online lessons… yes, it was frustrating, but they adapted, got over it and never lost that joy and innocence that are the true hallmarks of being a child. â€œI’m going to be like Iron Man and go bash that virus”, my son still tells me. And some days, just like him, I wish I had that degree of enthusiasm, optimism… and even an Iron Man suit. But seeing them, their resilience, their energy made it easier for us to plough through this year full-steamish ahead.

And lastly and most importantly, no matter what… no matter how difficult things seem… how hopeless they may look… how sad or upset or unhappy or disappointed we may be… In the end, life has a way of balancing everything out. I am a firm believer that life is the great leveller and so for all the pain and suffering that 2020 has caused and for how difficult a year it has seemed, in the grand scheme of things… of our lives… it will just be a small bump. We may look back at 2020 as the great leveller, a year of hindsight (2020 vision remember), where we learnt so much about ourselves.  I read an article on the BBC that talked about how major events have an impact on our lives. It ended aptly with: â€œâ€¦hoping for happiness from positive events appears misplaced”. Life, it turns out, is a pleasant hike on a flat course, not a roller coaster.” This, for me, sums up everything that has happened in 2020, nicely.

There was a lot more I also learnt from just watching and being around my wife and kids this year. It brought us a lot closer together and something I will be thankful for in 2020. If ever there was a year in which Marcus Aurelius’ words rung true, then 2020 was it. After all, he said, “You have power over your mind – not outside events. Realise this, and you will find strength.”

Until then, adieu and a happy, safe and healthy 2021. Keep smiling!