What I learned from the sales pitch from hell

I was finding my pitch difficult from the start. The law firm partner told me outright that he wasn’t interested in making using any tech tools personally. I’d given him some good reasons why it could help his law firm and I thought I was getting somewhere until he let out a huge yawn and stared out the window. I felt my blood pressure rising and paused. He put his foot up on the table. Someone snorted with laughter. I checked through my mental list. This was harder than I had thought it would be but I was doing OK.

The “law firm partner” was really an actor doing a role play with me in a NIDA Corporate course on effective communication. I asked him to be uninterested and difficult so that I could test what I’d learned over the preceding two days. Turned out he was very good at being contrary.

That session felt like the longest 10 minutes in my life, but I learned so much from it. I was able to observe and consciously choose the way I spoke without getting rattled.

Over two days we covered some of the tools that actors use to manage their posture, gesture, voice and their breath. Doing these exercises was illuminating for me. It was like when I did some drawing classes and learned a new way to look at everyday objects. I saw colour shapes and perspectives in a way that I hadn’t seen before. I gained a new appreciation for small nuances I hadn't paid attention to before.

Even though I’d been presenting and persuading in Court and negotiations for years, I hadn’t consciously examined how I could use my posture and delivery to be more effective. The value of a prepartory sigh. The importance of a pause. How different it felt to be grounded and to consciously occupy the space. Some of it was advice I'd heard many times. Doing the exercises, with someone giving immediate feedback was transformative.

The course facilitator gave each person individualised feedback which was honest and kind. I saw how the others were improving and so, even when I found it hard, I trusted the feedback that I was getting was valuable. And it was about working with my own style, amplifying my strengths, not just copying what Obama does.

Two days of being hypersensitive about how I was speaking, and focusing less on what I was saying, was eye-opening. ?The course taught me what I need to pay attention to. I’ve listened to podcasters who run out of breath at the end of the sentence – now I know how to fix that. I’m still practising not rushing, but I’m improving. I feel more able to prepare and I know how to check and correct course necessary.

“Powerful people initiate speech more often, talk more overall, and make more eye contact while they’re speaking than powerless people do. When we feel powerful, we speak more slowly and take more time. We don’t rush. We’re not afraid to pause. We feel entitled to the time we’re using.”

Amy Cuddy, Presence

If you have ever felt that you didn't land a critical message, or dread speaking up in tense situations, you might benefit from getting some training on how you can become a more effective communicator. If you want to have more impact, giving yourself some more tools to communicate effectively in any situation might be just what you need.

If you don't have two days to spend, I highly recommend reading How to Own the Room by Viv Groskop which has excellent practical tips, focusing on public speaking specifically.

Have you done any training on better communication? I'd love to hear what works for you?

I share tips and ideas on how to make the most of your existing tech to work smarter and more efficiently. I've written a book that is a practical guide to beoming a tech enabled lawyer, no matter where you work. If you would like to hear more tips and be updated on when the book is available, register here.