What I Learned from Martial Arts

This story happened when I was 12. I was returning home from school. The sixth grade studied on the second shift, so it was already getting dark. Just five meters from my house, I was attacked by three boys 3-4 years older than me. And they beat me up.

Those few minutes of helplessness are forever engraved in my memory. I was scared, I was furious, but there was nothing I could do about being beaten. At some point, I managed to break free and run away. I don't know how long I ran. For some reason, I hid on the roof of one of the houses where a few hours later my parents somehow found me.

I did not break anything, got off with bruises and scratches. But I realized that I should be able to protect myself. I never again wanted to feel powerless. After a while I signed up for the taekwondo section.

The truth is, if I'm attacked by three people twice my size right now, I won't be able to defend myself either. But five years of taekwondo and then 2 years of unarmed self-defense taught me something else.

Here are the lessons of martial arts I learned.

1) Face your fears

I went to my first training session terrified. I was afraid that I would be hit and hurt. I was afraid that I would look ridiculous. I was afraid that I would immediately show everyone what a loser I was.

It was Friday. And if I knew in advance that Friday was sparring day, I would never have come at all.

But I came. All were dressed in beautiful snow-white identical uniforms. The only difference was in the color of the belts, some wore yellow, others had blue or red, and a few even wore black. Since it was my first training session, I was in a printed t-shirt and pink pants. Pink, can you imagine.

After the warm-up, the coach came up to me, explained that today was sparring day and put me in front of some petite girl with a blue belt, telling her "Inna, take it easy, she is new girl." Like it wasn't obvious. I looked at the girl, she seemed to be so fragile. I attempted an attack anyway. Inna jumped up, turned beautifully in the air and ... the last thing I saw before passing out was her heel in front of my eyes. When I came out of it, everyone crowded round me, and the coach scolded Inna.

So, on the very first day, I faced all my fears at the same time. I looked as ridiculous as possible, I was hit and I was hurt, and it was clear to everyone that I was a weakling. But all fears were gone. Moving forward, I was not afraid that I would be hurt and just trained hard. I wasn't afraid to look funny because I already hit bottom on the first day, and then I only got better. Sometimes it's a huge advantage to lose. I was lucky that I learned this lesson quickly and at the beginning of that journey.

2) Understand that strength is not only muscles

The fellows I trained with told me that taekwondo is three words and means "body", "strength" and "spirit" in Korean. Then I found out that the translation is actually different but I still liked this made-up explanation. As I wrote above, I quickly realized that even with a black belt I would not be able to defend myself against several attackers. But martial arts taught me to be strong in spirit.

I have learned not to give up when things get tough. It is rare that someone performs a combat technique well the first time. Even 85 times is not enough. We learned how to break wooden boards with our feet after several thousand practice kicks.

Every day I got a little better if I practiced every day. The result could be noticeable in months or even years, but every day mattered. It disciplined me. I didn't just rely on training three times a week. I practiced every day at home, trained my body. And as a result, I trained my spirit.

"Martial arts is not about fighting; it’s about building a character."―Bo Bennett

3) Respect other people and yourself and be responsible

Martial arts are infused with respect. We had to be respectful to the more experienced martial artists, to each other, and even to the gym in which the training took place. The higher the grade a person has, the more experienced he or she is. Grades are distinguished by the color of the belt. A new belt is not given just like that, it must be earned. Therefore, respect grows with the growth of grade, but each step forward adds more responsibility.

One day, two guys from training quarreled and started to fight. They used the techniques that the coach taught us. He was enraged, and after the punishment he talked to us for a long time. He said that for every power there would be always a greater power. We must be careful to use what we have learned.

About the punishment. The coach always punished everyone, even if only one was guilty. The punishments were different. It could have been push-ups for the entire 90 minutes of the class. Or he hit us with a bamboo stick. But always everyone was punished. It taught me responsibility. After all, my actions could affect not only me, but the whole team. If someone does something wrong I must intervene, otherwise, it can also affect everyone which means that doing nothing can be harmful too. It's easy to be a beginner with a white belt. The main thing is to practice a lot, listen and treat everyone with respect. But the higher you climb, the more responsibility you bear.

"With great power comes great responsibility."