What I learned In Boating School (Graduate Edition)

“I have come to believe that coming true is not the only purpose of a dream. Its most important purpose is to get us in touch with where dreams comes from, where passion comes from, where happiness comes from. Even a shattered dream can do that for you.” - Lisa Bu

It's been a month since the start of my second quarter in graduate school and the new term is already coming to a close (5 more weeks!). While my experiences might not mirror the one you will have or have had, I wanted to take some time to reflect and share some lessons I learned. Also, I really hope some of you recognize the reference from the title, because this article is going to feature some SpongeBob references.

At the start of my program, I thought I was prepared to succeed. Since I was admitted into graduate school, I thought my study habits and coping skills were more than enough. Well.....like many things in life, your first perceptions aren't always true. While I was doing well, I didn't feel like I was excelling, I was merely surviving. Like Sponge Bob, I was confident in some aspects of my life (his prowess in making Krabby Patties). However, I also didn't feel like I was good at a lot of other things (his horrendous boat driving skills). Looking back only 3 months prior, I thought I was ready to excel. Luckily, with the support of my family and friends, I experimented with new strategies. To thrive I built new habits, believed in myself, and I leaned on my support system. It hasn’t been easy, but I’ve learned from many wonderful teachers, both inside and outside of the classroom. From the people I’ve met to the books I’ve read, here are the four lessons and habits I learned from boating school...I mean graduate school.

Stay curious. The thing with public health is that as an interdisciplinary field, everything is related. From sociology to environmental science, public health draws on various industries. On top of my reading assignments, I developed a habit to consume content outside of my field. Since graduating from undergrad, I've gained a deeper appreciation for reading and a newfound love for podcasts. During this time, and since then, my curiosity has allowed me to try and find connections between seemingly unrelated things. One of my favorite compliments is to hear, "Raffy, you ask a lot of questions!" It might not seem like the kindest thing to hear, but it strengthens my desire to learn more. Curiosity is a skill I've taken time to cultivate. From health-related research to updates around technology, diversifying the knowledge I consume opens up my mind to new and fresh perspectives. While I mostly read nonfiction and books on personal development, I actively search for noteworthy memoirs and fictional tales. Some of my favorites include the smash hit Crazy Rich Asians and Trevor Noah's Born A Crime. Both stories feature widely different plots, yet they both offer such interesting life lessons! In following my curiosity, I step outside of my stress and gain an appreciation for writing and storytelling. Reading has pushed me to develop my writing capabilities. I’ve also learned to be patient with others and myself. My curiosity provides me with a path to explore new and fresh perspectives, so I can apply them into my life.

2. Embrace challenges. In graduate school, you’re going to feel like you don’t belong. Even with my familiarity Impostor Syndrome, I still felt inadequate. In group projects, this feeling can be amplified. You might work with the most intelligent people in your program! I learned first-hand that experience is always the best teacher. The only way to move forward is to embrace these challenges. Instead of shying away and ignoring your feelings of inadequacy, embrace it. I accepted that I wasn’t going to be the best student in all my classes, but I had to embrace these feelings and move forward. Working with them can make you feel like you’re left behind. Instead of ruminating on these thoughts, use them instead as fuel to improve and be better. If you’re the smartest person in the room you’re probably not going to learn a lot. Face the challenges head on. You don’t have to face it alone. The student affairs administration is there to provide guidance and your cohort is there to support you. I’m grateful for the people I met in my program because they showed me to continue improving and to enjoy the process that is graduate school.

Practice Creativity. I can read music (not very well), act (once for a cultural night), and play the guitar. But never in my life did I ever consider myself creative. Being creative always seemed like it was reserved for geniuses and prodigies, like Squidward. Of course, once again I was wrong. The labels we use to describe ourselves may shape how we live our lives. Creativity isn't just how well we can play the clarinet, it's also how we solve problems. I learned to embrace creativity by fostering it with my lab. In one project, the Weekly Newsletter, I am able to explore my visual creativity. I might not have the best eye for beauty but I've taken up this challenge to develop a more critical eye for aesthetics. The subject of aesthetics and how it can promote joy has been of great interest for me. The design is still a work in progress, but as I toil away, I remind myself that creativity is a process of trial and error. Practicing creativity has helped me, and it’s been a lot of fun.

Find Quiet time. There are two kinds of people in the world, those who like to categorize people into groups and those who do not. As an extrovert and as an Obliger (look into Gretchen Rubin’s Four Tendencies), I'm not only a people person, but I'm also a people pleaser. I had come to believe that my productivity is highest when I'm engaged and busy. As someone who thrives through stimulation, I never thought to go against my personalities and take time to rest or find quiet time. Through “Learning How to Learn”, I learned the importance of taking breaks. In the process of learning, taking a walk or a short nap, strengthens the connections in our brains, which fosters long-term memory. Now I actively seek out quiet time, through intentional breaks such as the Pomodoro Technique, which separates your workflow into 25 minute chunks. I suggest you look into it and the course! I also learned that embracing solitude is beneficial not only to my academic goals but also in my relationships. By spending time alone, you can reflect and realize how vital your friendships can be. Since I currently live in a house with eight people, I'm constantly tempted to hangout and have fun. To focus on my work and learn, I need time to be alone. I was guilty at first with being with myself because I thought I was losing my friendships. After finally being vocal about my need for solitude, their response were gracious and full of support. Now, I am intentional about spending time with my friends through monthly dinners or social gatherings. I psyched myself out when I should have faced it head on. Quiet time is important not only for fostering deep learning, it's also to foster deep relationships.

Rich Roll said it best, “You’ve got to train where you’re at. Not where you think you could be, not where you want to be, not where you used to be, but where you are right now.” The lessons and habits I share did not come to me all at once. They were the results of countless hours of trial and error. Your experience might not be similar to mine, in fact you might be better prepared! Regardless of your level, know that you don’t have to be perfect at first. Take time, experiment, and fail. The best way to thrive is to accept yourself as you are, not what you think you should be.

For the folks who had already completed a semester/quarter of a graduate program, what are the lessons and habits that have allowed you to thrive?