What I learned about 2 conditions of change and why timing matters

There are two really interesting conditions of change that I encountered yesterday morning: pain and time.?

For the last few - let’s call it 6! - months, I’ve had a growing situation that was getting on my nerves: our hall closet was stuffed to the gills and everything was a mess.??

My parents visited at Christmas and I’d bought some new bedding for them. Once their visit was over, I shoved the additional sheets and towels into the already-full closet.?

Our older son got a bigger bed at some point this year (who knows when, with GCSEs I’ve lost all sense of time apart from knowing that it’s felt like the longest year ever…!). So then we had more bedding - the new and the old - and that all just got thrown into the closet too.

There were now a lot of different sizes (single, double, queen) and some varying degrees of longevity in terms of what’s in there. Some items are probably ready to graduate to Textile Heaven but I couldn’t figure out which ones yet.?

A couple of weeks ago our younger son came and asked me if we had any clean towels because he couldn’t find them. “We have LOADS of clean towels!” I exclaimed, and then trotted us off to show him. “See!” I said triumphantly, flinging open the door. Then we both stood staring with confused faces into the mess. “They’re here somewhere,” I said, digging in. The towels were hiding quite far in, so I couldn’t really blame him for his question.

Did I deal with it then and there? Of course not. I shut that door and thought, I have to sort that out one of these days.??

Over the weeks, it’s been a similar scene: open the door to get a towel, toilet paper, or new sheets and then be met with a cascade of items spilling out into the hallway. The way people who’ve been stuffed into a too-full car for a long summer car journey almost melt out of the car when they open the doors at their destination.?

Finally yesterday, it reached a breaking point. I went to get a pillowcase and ended up with a cotton landslide at my feet. That’s it, I thought. It’s time for me to deal with this.?

The pain had gotten high enough.

And crucially, what I also noticed was that I had time to deal with it. Up ‘til then, my head had been very full. I’ve been busy and not had a clear amount of time to focus on it.?

But when the pain got too high, AND I also had the time, I spent about 30 minutes taking absolutely everything out and bringing some order back. It only took me half an hour once I decided to do it, there and then.?

One of the things I hear from people who are considering working with me for coaching is that time might be a struggle. They know they need or want to make the time, but making it is a different thing.?

I just want to say, especially from my experience with my hall closet: I get that. For most people and the way change happens, we need a reason to want to change, and we need at least a little clearing in our headspace to begin.?

Maybe it has been too busy up until now. For me it had been.?

My hope is that you can begin to make a little time for yourself, before everything spills out all over the place. You decide when that is.

Last night I took everyone in my family to show them my handiwork. I was satisfied, proud, and pleased with myself.

If I can help you to start to make that clearing (in your mind, not your closets - home organising goes well beyond my skillset!), please let me know. I’d love to help. The other side of change feels really good, even if it did take me a little while to get there.

#change #coaching