What I Don’t Miss

Two and a half years into retirement seems a reasonable moment for further reflection on the transition from full-time work to whatever this version of retirement may be. I’m grateful to have opportunity to make further professional and personal contributions through my various teaching, advising, consulting and writing roles but certainly don’t miss many aspects of the full-time working life. Among the things I definitely don’t miss are:

1. Flood of emails - In the last few years of work, I think I averaged 300 emails a day. Honestly, I don’t know how anyone can keep up with email traffic these days and with my commitment (foolish?) not to let an email sit overnight without response, I was attending to emails every waking hour. And I hated the fact that I was causing the same challenges for others since I couldn’t confine my own generated emails to conventional working hours. Despite my beginning weekend messages with something like “please don’t look at this until Monday”, I know I was as much a cause of excess working time as I was a victim of it. I’m aware of apps designed to better manage email traffic flow, but regardless of how they’re sorted, they all need a glance and, likely, a response at some time. And don’t get me started on the incivility of blind-copying, mass emailing and marketing distribution of email addresses. No wonder young people hate email and hardly pay attention to them (despite institutional assertions that email is the official form of communications). But, is texting any better? My sense is that text messages are now as overwhelming (or more) than email. Now, I’m down to 20-30 emails a day and that seems quite manageable!
2. Meetings, Meetings and More Meetings - Over the past two decades, work essentially became a marathon of daily meetings. I loathed the fact that my assistant seemed to spend nearly half her day managing my calendar which was constantly in flux depending on last minute expectations from others. Fortunately, I had the ability to review my schedule each morning (actually night before) and know my day without having to resort to a printed schedule. Certainly, there were many gatherings I very much enjoyed, but as someone who likes to wander, observe and think, having most of every day spent in one meeting after another left little time for reflection, unplanned student interaction and all the reading, writing and planning the job required. Now, having retired before Covid wreaked havoc on all ‘normal’ campus activities, I suspect that hour after hour of online meetings would have made me even crazier. But, should some sense of pre-Covid business patterns re-emerge one day, I strongly suggest that those of you still working carve out weekly blocks of time that you protect!?
3. Stress - This is a difficult subject for me because I don’t often write or talk about my struggles with the stress of my work. To be honest, I didn’t even know how stressful my life was or how pernicious stress was to me and my body until I began to experience physical manifestations I couldn’t attribute to any other disease. Judy knew it well before I did and encouraged me to deal with it before it got worse. But, as the indestructible male (idiot), I rejected her advice and doubled down on more work. Eventually, I hit a wall…sleepless nights, constant fatigue, inexplicable chills, panic attacks and more. Thank goodness for a doctor who immediately recognized the symptoms and got me on the right medications. And, thank goodness for a partner/spouse who insisted that I take better care of myself. Stress is certainly a silent killer and if just one of you reading this realizes the need to address your own stressful circumstance, I’m pleased.?
4. Managing People - Now, I really like people (most of them)…really, I do! But, what I absolutely don’t miss is being responsible for the work and behaviors of others. I will never do another performance review (one person I know is laughing because of how poorly I did them anyway) and I will never again call someone in to tell them that they need to find another job. I won’t miss hearing one person complain about another and I’ll never participate in another 360 degree review. I definitely miss the conversations and engagements with so many diverse people and I miss our collective accomplishments, but I do.not.miss. drama, consternation, competition, coercion, disrespect, nor disfunction. Nope…no more supervision for me!
5. Being Managed by Others - I wrote ages ago about best and worst bosses (https://www.dhirubhai.net/pulse/bosses-larry-moneta) and there’s not much I would add.?
6. Perfomances - The nature of my work always made me feel like I was performing nearly all the time. Performances included addresses to my staff, presentations to senior administrators, talks to student organizations, fund-raising gatherings, Board of Trustee sessions, welcoming remarks to parents, alumni and others, and even regular staff meetings. I realized years ago that I was better at impromptu presentations than I was at formal speeches, but I agonized over every one of them. I spent more time re-thinking my remarks than it took to give them. I did my own PowerPoints, wrote my own remarks, crafted my own presentations and presided over thousands of gatherings. Now, I just very much enjoy my Penn teaching role (performance) and watching my grandkids’ performances!?
7. Politics - Another awkward topic to address. That colleges and universities are extremely political environments should come as a surprise to no one. In fact, higher education may well be the perfect political environment as a setting with as many interests and perspectives as people. But, not unlike the political environment of elective office, campus politics have become siloed, unyielding and destructive….all mouths and no ears. Judgement precedes consideration and facts are a trifle unworthy of attention. I take no side on the right or left wing version of the political debacle (though my own politics are decidedly leftish) given comparable behaviors I’ve observed from both. Legislatures are increasingly intrusive and presidents, once powerful advocates for higher education as engines of social change, are now silent.?
8. The Down Side of Student Life - In all honesty, most of my time with students was wonderful. I’m so proud of so many with whom I stay in contact and who are doing amazing things themselves. The opportunity to support young people on the many campuses that employed me always kept me going. But, four times I had to call parents to tell them that a child had died. I’ll never miss that. Too many times, I had to respond to students and parents wanting to intervene on behalf of their student who were being suspended or expelled for some egregious offense (claiming FERPA confidentiality was never satisfying). For my last decade of work, I agonized over the frequency of sexual misconduct and the intractable nature of that offense. Every racial, homophobic, antisemitic, Islamaphobic and sexist incident made me wonder how I’d failed to prevent it. I have so many stories in mind that I’ll never be able to recount and I won’t miss having to deal with the next one.?

To be clear, there is much I do miss from my decades of work on numerous campuses. In fact, that list would be far longer and with more depth. It would include many, many courageous, influential and accomplished people. It would include having power and authority. It might include the food (really!). It would definitely include the beauty of the campus environments especially as seasons transition. It would predominantly include the students.?

Happy 2022!