What Have I Done

Anyone who has ever made a life altering decision may have asked themselves..."What have I done". Not as an admission of failure, but one of excitement, exuberance, or just plain relief.

I was reminded of this feeling, just this week, when almost eight years ago I made a life altering decision of my own. The reminder came from a former colleague who recently made his own life altering decision.

When I saw him I could tell right away something was different, his smile was bigger, he looked more confident, relaxed, almost relieved...and that was before he said a word to me about his news. As soon as he told me the news, it was then obvious why he looked the way I described him.

Our conversation was brief, but I felt humbled that he would take the time to tell me his great news. As I drove away, I began to reflect on what had just happened.

I looked in the rear view mirror, and saw the corner of my face...and I was smiling, but why? I was happy for him, happy for his family, happy he took the risk to do something new...on his own terms.

Then...

I was thrust back to eight years ago, a time when I had come to a point in my life that I needed a renewal. I tried to fake may way into telling myself I was happy and telling others as well, but happiness had left years before. I was in essence hanging on and losing not only hope, but motivation...which was not comfortable as I recall.

I had told myself some years before, that if I was ever unhappy where I was, I would not stay there...life is too short, there is too much to experience, too much to achieve and too much to be happy about.

End of a Rope

In life we all face decisions, but not all decisions are easy, some can in fact be debilitating...dragging a person down, burdened by the unknown, all while knowing something has to be done before it is too late.

That is where I was eight years ago this very week. I was beaten down, or as they say, I was toast. Outwardly, almost no one knew it, because there was the job. I put aside what was going on inside and got the job done, at my own emotional and psychological expense. Until I realized it was no longer sustainable for my well being.

Ultimately, and shortly thereafter, I made that life altering decision with confidence, and gained my happiness back which exists to this very day. Never looking back to ask, "What have I done"...instead, I reminded myself, "Look what I have done".

This is to all those out there who are faced with a life altering decision. Trust yourself, trust your ability, do not accept unhappiness, seek happiness with all you have.

Joshua 1:9, “Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.”

God Bless All