What has love got to do with it?

What has love got to do with it?

Those of my vintage would remember this famous Tina Turner song released in 1984. A rage those days.

But I asked this question in a different context-:while reading Prof. Hitendra Wadhwa’s book, Inner Mastery, Outer Impact, where he asserts that leadership is about love.

Hmmm. Really?

Intrigued, I read on. His argument is simple. The best leaders in the world, the ones that many admire-- Mother Theresa, Mahatma Gandhi, Martin Luther King- lived and led with love.

I realize that the immediate reaction to this is going to be cringy- because we often, unfortunately, associate love with certain baser human instincts. However, Hitendra argues that such leaders displayed their love for a cause, say freedom, and that, in turn, inspired and energized those around them.

In business, many leaders believe their role is to get their people to be most productive: to drive them relentlessly to “get it done”, win against competition, and make their function, department, or organization successful. I do not find any fault in that- but what matters is how the leaders go about accomplishing the goal. Do they do that by coercion? By pushing people? Or manipulating them? Or do they do that by valuing people, energizing them, being compassionate, and showing love? Leadership is not about control. Exercise of control is often an exercise in power, not leadership. Leadership is about unleashing and inspiring people- the opposite of control. It is about exercising love- when people automatically gravitate towards you and the larger cause that you are driving. Real leadership, therefore, is about exercising love, not power!

Prof. Wadhwa defines leadership, not in business-centric ways (for instance, winning in the marketplace, crushing the competition, controlling your destiny) but in human-centric terms. Love, he says (I am paraphrasing), is about feeling joy in other people’s joy and success. True leaders look beyond success for themselves and find joy in the success of others. Therefore, when leaders lead with love, they connect, and care about the people they work with- and when that energy is transmitted and shown, people feel energized and inspired. They feel unleashed. This is how great leaders can inspire people to bloom to their full potential. McKinsey recently came up with a report that one of the main causes for the great resignation is the fact that people do not feel valued by their leaders (or by their organizations). Deloitte mentions that empathy is one of the biggest issues in organizations today. Well, there is a word that captures the combination of?empathy, compassion, care, and feeling valued- love!

One of the strangest phenomena I have observed during the pandemic (and after) is the outpouring of love at moments when humanity is most vulnerable. Remember at the onslaught of the pandemic, many of us extended our love to those brave first-responders? Some showed their appreciation by banging their kitchen utensils, others by baking bread and making coffee for the tired nurse or doctor? If you recollect, the world suddenly got smaller- managers called their employees to check on them. Gallup points out that engagement levels in organizations shot up during the early days of the pandemic to the highest levels ever- an apparent correlation between the outpouring of love from the leadership and fellow colleagues. So maybe leadership love has a real business impact, especially if love and employee engagement are correlated. And we know employee?engagement drives business success. ?If so, love is an underleveraged engagement tool!

When a leader is loving, it goes viral- employees feel connected to each other, connected to a cause, and it ends up them loving their leader, in turn. ?This is why when we are asked to name a leader that we respect- we end up with a Mandela or a Gandhi- people we have never seen or met before- but have enveloped us with their love for their cause, and extending their reach far beyond their self, their space and even time.

Perhaps the most poignant example from Hitendra’s book – and hit me hard especially after the school shootings in Texas a couple of?weeks ago, was his story about Antoinette Tuff, a bookkeeper who was manning the front door reception of an elementary school in Georgia on August 20, 2013, when a disturbed young man walked in with an assault rifle and five hundred rounds of ammunition. Antoinette, exercising great wisdom, restraint, and more than anything else, love, was able to talk him out of harming the children or himself before the?police arrived. Maybe in the world we live in these days, much of what is seen as evil is not about a lack of laws, but a lack of love?

If love can disarm a school shooter, or if love can move proverbial mountains, why cannot love make an organization more successful? When I did my research on engagement, it was clear that the small acts of love from a leader that made a big difference- a text message in the evening thanking the employee for their hard day’s work, a small gift sent home on the birth of the first child, the handwritten note of appreciation for a successful quarter, were the things employed remembered the most. Gestures of caring, compassion, and connection- in other words, love.

So, now going back to Tina Turner: What has love got to do with it?

Well, as Prof. Wadhwa, puts it- everything. True leadership is an exercise of love.

Do you agree?

Prof. Wadhwa’s book is available in the market from the 8th of June. For preordering the copy, please click on the following link.

Disclaimer: I am an associate of Prof. Wadhwa and the Mentora Institute.?