What Happens When You Stop Pretending Everything’s Okay?

?? She Might Be You

Avoid any form of judgment or criticism. This could be you—maybe she is you.

This week, that idea is even stronger because I’m going to talk about four women, and one of them is definitely you.

?? Feeling Different is OK

Look, we spend most of our lives trying to fit in, but deep down, we know we feel different. That difference? I call it unique. Individuality makes up the 1% difference. Could that 1% be logged in how we process information, perceive life, and what makes us or not experience burnout?

?? Latoya - The Perfectionist

Latoya had started the program. She was supposed to be learning how to “let go,” but it wasn’t quite sinking in. One night, she went out to dinner with her partner. The waiter came to take their order. Her partner was ready right away, but Sarah? She was stuck.

What if I pick the wrong thing? What if the fish isn’t fresh? What if the meat isn’t grass-fed? She couldn’t stop. Every option had a what if attached to it. The waiter gave her husband a look—the kind that says, I’ll come back when she figures it out—and disappeared.

Fifteen minutes went by. Latoya still hadn’t decided. Her partner sat there, sipping his drink, scrolling through his phone, glancing at her like, Here we go again. The waiter came back. Sarah panicked and blurted out something. “Okay, I’m ready now.”

But then the waiter replied, “Oh, sorry, we’re out of that.”

Her brain exploded. She was beyond overwhelmed. Her husband’s eyes were full of disappointment: “You make everything so hard.” She was hurt, embarrassed, and guilty for ruining the dinner. The program told her to let go, but they didn’t explain how to do that when her mind is wired to do the opposite. How are you supposed to let go when ordering dinner feels like a life-or-death decision?

???♀? Natsumi - The Overworker

Yoga class? Canceled. Again. Natsumi had planned time for herself, but when her boss called with an urgent project, her plans went out the window—again.

She came home to a messy kitchen and snapped. “Seriously? You couldn’t clean up?” Her partner, annoyed, asked, “What did you do all day?”

The program told her and the rest of the group to prioritize herself, but how do you ask for help when you’re always the one doing everything?

?? Carmen - The Creative

Rachel’s program told her to focus on mindfulness. So, one night, her partner guided her to meditate.

Within 10 seconds, Rachel’s mind wandered—ten things she’d rather be doing. Her partner sighed, “Why can’t you just sit still?”

The program said to "be present," but it didn’t address how her mind kept distracting her from what she was really feeling deep down.

?? Sofia - The Conflict-Avoidant

Sofia had rehearsed telling her boyfriend how hurt she was that he forgot her birthday—again. But when she walked in, all she could say was, “Hey babe, how was your day?”

She felt paralyzed. She could get another word out. The program said to “speak her/their truth,” but it didn’t teach her/them how to stop being terrified of confrontation.

? Why Generic Programs Fail

They all went for the same program, hoping it would help them feel better—more energy, less negativity, a sense of peace. It had glowing reviews, great testimonials. But it didn’t work because burnout can not be treated like a cold.

We are all unique. Those women process life differently than one another, have different triggers, and experience burnout uniquely too. So, the program couldn’t work for them in the long run.

?? Performing in Someone Else’s Program

They tried to follow the program, but every day felt like performing for the coach—fitting themselves into something that didn’t match their reality. Sure, it helped for a while, but it was like putting a band-aid on a wound that needed stitches. Yes, it stops the bleed but it the wound gets rotten, making it a lot worst.

?? Why It Didn’t Last

The program wasn’t tailored to their needs, brain type, behaviors, or how they experience life. It focused on self-care and mindfulness without considering their individual stories past trauma and beliefs. It didn’t go deep enough to truly solve the problem, which is why it couldn’t have made lasting changes.

?? Being Unique is Your Power

At some point, we have to stop trying to be like everyone else. Embrace your uniqueness. Build your life around who you are, not who the world expects you to be.

?? Why My Approach is Different

That’s why they came to me—because my approach is different. I go to the root cause. I see my clients for who they are, want and could become. And I make my program about them—not the other way around. I perform for my clients—they don’t perform for me.

?? Why Theory Isn’t Enough

Group programs teach theories, and on size fit all methods expecting you to change overnight. But often, we need more than just theory. Don’t you think? Why should we fit in? We need a step-by-step system with space to practice, accountability and support when we feel like S*** hits the fan. So we build the confidence to apply tools and strategies that work for our own situation and our relationship.

?? Here’s How I Work

That’s what I do. Do yourself a favor, take this less than 60-second quiz. You’ll find out what your brain type is and get to participate to a transformative, self-reflective exercise to gain clarity on what’s holding you back. Give yourself those 60 seconds to move forward with your life.

?? Here’s What You’ll Discover on Friday...

At my live event on Friday, I’ll share something you haven’t seen before—a tool that helps you understand not just what you’re feeling, but why it’s happening. You’ll leave with clarity and an action plan. They are many things you can afford to miss but those Friday event aren’t one of them.

?? Change is a Decision Away

You want to stop aiming at “overcoming” burnout as if life is a battlefield. You want to focus at eliminating what’s holding you back, so you can live life on your own terms and meet the real you.

Understand this: Change is a decision away. If change is to be, it’s up to you. So, when is a good time for you to start putting yourself first? To prioritize yourself? when is a good time for you to move from wishful thinking to making it happen? Think about it. And when you’re done thinking, get in touch with me. Send me that DM and let’s make this about you for once. I’m here for you.

Let this read be the moment you decide to change.

See you on Friday at my 5-minute Live Event, where I’ll expand on this and give you the tools to start turning your life around.

Change is a decision away, and if it is to be, it’s up to you.

See you on Friday! Link to the event is in the comments below. Start the conversation and book your seat.

With love and care,

Maty x