What Happens When You Google Yourself?

Which camp do you belong to? The one which propagates tight and deliberate control over every piece of content you as a private and public figure generate? Or are you with those who are burdened by the idea of maintaining this forced digital personality? While these options seem to be somewhat extreme, there are, unfortunately, no in-between solutions.

In Russian we say: “You can’t be a little bit pregnant, you either are or you are not”. This is not far-removed from the way we choose to present ourselves to the world. You are either consistent or you are not.

As the internet became more organized, more social and professional, and we forgot the feeling of anticipation that the sound of a dial-up modem used to excite, most of us settled into a less adventurous digital representation of ourselves

By now, you must have figured that if I had to choose, I'd join the first camp . This is for two reasons.

Digital is real

First of all I don’t believe that executing a reasonable degree of self-control in the digital realm is in any way different from the way we would present ourselves in a more physical reality. In our early explorations of the net we gorged on the anonymity of chat rooms, the freedom of expression and an opportunity to experience the lives of our alter egos.

As the internet became more organized, more social and professional, and we forgot the feeling of anticipation that the sound of a dial-up modem used to excite, most of us settled into a less adventurous digital representation of ourselves: generally a someone who is very close to our “real” selves.

The difference is that online we are exposed to a much larger audience of friends, acquaintances and contacts from all stages of life. Additionally, there are all the potential audiences: employers, business partners, colleagues and children. They may one day step onto the digital footprint, since it doesn’t easily get erased or buried in the seeming chaos of our internet-driven reality as long as we have Google, Yahoo! Baidu, Yandex and the rest of them as gatekeepers.

In this reality, you cannot easily switch hats between social circles - so an exemplary young staffer cannot turn into a rowdy party-goer without appearing obviously inconsistent. What is wrong with lack of consistency?

• Well, for one, we associate consistency with trust and reliability, which appear to be at the foundation of influence. Cialdini has been preaching this for decades, and it is still relevant in the context of our connected society.
• Lack of consistency in the way one comes across may be attractive in small doses, but generally it is something that may lead people to believe that they don’t know the real you. It is hard to build sustainable relationships with an imposter.

To conclude this point, I would like to emphasize that the digital world is a very real world. It is not a copy or a reflection. If anything, it is an extension of the physical reality we live in and it makes perfect sense that we extend our beliefs, behaviour and attitude as well as a reasonable amount of self-regulation onto this dimension.

We can make it work for us

And now back to “maintaining a forced persona” argument and why I don’t buy it. In the “real” world, we learn to be pleasant, sociable and friendly. We learn to present ourselves favorably in a professional environment and we learn to recognize an appropriate moment for disagreeing or standing up for our beliefs or ideas. Thus I don’t see why doing all the same in the digital world would make many to experience this as forced or unnatural.

There is a huge difference, by the way, between “being deliberate” and “being careful”.

Unless, of course, we have come to assume a digital personality - any personality. The trick is not to pretend to be someone that we are not [old news!], but be strategic about what aspects of your personality you choose to present and, ideally, leverage.

As Michael Porter so accurately put it: “A strategy is in choosing what not to do”, and I am quite certain we can apply it successfully to the topic under discussion. By being deliberate in your all aspects of your online behaviour – what you share, what you publish and endorse – we can take a clear stand and represent very specific values or skills.

There is a huge difference, by the way, between “being deliberate” and “being careful”. The latter assumes there are hidden dangers and traps one must watch out for. This mindset is what causes the feeling of being a fake or having that “forced” digital persona - we simply cannot allow ourselves to be genuine and relaxed while continuously on alert.

Being deliberate, on the other hand, puts control into our own hands and allows for planning, as well as creativity and freedom of expression. It takes away the pressure to follow any predetermined route. The deliberateness of choices that a tech blogger and a financial executive make as they engage in their respective digital communities vary significantly but the success of this engagement is not determined by the tactics as much as by the strategy of “what not to do”. Call it a “personal brand” or “online reputation” – the terminology is in this case not very relevant. What is relevant is the outcome – and what it is that you see when you type your name in a search engine and hit "Enter".

@zhenyastarkova | Starkova Communication & Strategy | Happy Folk