What going through COVID brought to my career
Despair. Sadness. Frustration. Pain. Anger. Anxiety.
I’ve experienced all of these intense emotions since March 2020. Have you?
Of course, there have been plenty of positive emotions too shifting through my consciousness and buoying me up but let’s focus on the negatives to start. Warning: no holes barred here.
I am pretty sure I had COVID back in March. I was lucky in that it wasn't very severe, although I think it took months to get back to feeling like myself, with tiredness being a key side effect. It is hard to tell though, as I wasn't getting great sleep, even without the virus. I’ve been through bouts of insomnia and headaches over the course of the summer.
Whether or not I did have it, the COVID age we've been living through has brought into the spotlight a lot of my innermost fears about all areas of my life, including my career.
I was constantly worrying about the future, asking myself questions like “Will I be able to sustain myself financially?” “Am I on the right course professionally?” “What is my game plan and how can I make it happen at such an unstable time?”
Self-doubts about my my abilities as a mum, a partner and a friend also crept in at the darkest points, with a nagging voice telling me “You’re not good enough at this stuff. Try harder!”
The worst days came after I’d had a completely sleepless night, from insomnia. They were the ones where I really chose to beat myself up and kick myself until I literally couldn’t lift my mood even by a few degrees.
There, I told you I would focus on the negatives! But, this isn’t a pity party. I'm not interested in sympathy. This is a journey of vital revelations for my future. What emerged from this achingly tough time was:
Inner conviction and deep certitude that I’m on the right course. I did a lot of meditation and worked with my mentors to really get to the heart of what I’m doing professionally and hone my sense of purpose in my work. I’m now more driven than ever to do the work I love and I know how this contributes to the wider world and the good of others - my coaching clients and beyond.
A releasing of my grip on trying to control its outcomes - With no childcare for my toddler over the summer, it really had to be about flowing through the day and accepting the reality of each moment instead of trying to push myself to do more and constantly be productive. And do you know what? I’ve actually become more productive as a result of this more relaxed outlook. It's not about control, it is about acceptance and enjoyment in each moment.
A true appreciation for the value of self-care: My routine has really changed since March. Every evening I now do a gentle yoga practice and a meditation. Every morning I wake up focusing on what I’m grateful for and believing that the world wants good things for me.
Consistent work on my mindset is the true gift that COVID has given me. I’m now deeply committed to my self-care as a foremost priority in my life. I invested in multiple ways this year - I had somatic therapy, counselling, seized opportunities for webinars on yoga and Reiki and dug deep into my wallet for courses with entrepreneurs and coaches whom I admire. Because I know this will pay off, strengthening me and creating a more positive, sustainable future. Plus it is super fun getting support from people who inspire you.
This approach to investing and supporting myself are acts of self-kindness. I've found that the kinder and more understanding, supportive and honest I am with myself about where I’m at, what I want and what’s not working for me, the more I heal and grow and the better equipped I am to support others.
I would love to hear about your learnings from the COVID-era (I hope we’re nearly through with it now, although who knows!)
Wishing you lots of positivity and success, whatever the next 12 months bring our way.