WHAT IT FEELS LIKE TURNING 39
It's my party and I'll cry if I want to!
What does it feel like turning 39? For me, it’s almost like it’s not real. Is this really my last year in my thirties??
This Saturday I have plans to go to the city for dinner and drinks and then a rooftop bar at midnight. My husband was like really? I said, “I want to live it up this year, it’s MY LAST YEAR IN MY THIRTIES!” I want to dance the night away like I’m in my twenties, but the good thing about being 39 is you can afford to stay in a nice hotel afterward, instead of crashing on your cousin’s sofa. Then again, being 39, I may not have the energy to make it to the rooftop!?
Turning 39 doesn’t really feel so different but it looks different. It looks like the lines around my eyes and forehead, the dozens of shapewear and Spanx in my closet to tuck in my baby weight, which by the way are all uncomfortable. It looks like the thousands of creams and lotions and “potions” and vitamin e oils, to turn back the hands of time. It’s never getting asked for your ID anymore.?
Turning 39 is questioning your wardrobe… like am I too old to wear this, now? It’s covering gray hairs and growing new moles and beauty marks every day. It’s an age where you really begin to consider Botox, if you aren’t doing it already and trying to keep your face out of the sun.?
It’s trying so many different workouts and diets but never really losing any weight, because those clothes that have been hanging in your closet for years are mocking you, just waiting for you to put them back on. I JUST WANT TO BE A SIZE 2 AGAIN! IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK FOR ON MY BIRTHDAY??
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Turning 39 is also a feeling of pride, accomplishment, comfort and knowing that you are exactly where you’re supposed to be right now.
The first half of my thirties, I really learned to love myself and be alone with myself. That allowed me to meet my husband. I am so grateful for this beautiful life;? for the past, the present and for what the future holds, and being able to share it with my amazing husband and our darling baby girl, Isabella.
If this is what 39 looks like then I’ll take it, fine lines and all.?