What Does Your Voice Say About You? Discover the Hidden Cues

Have you ever wondered what your voice reveals about you? Beyond your words, your voice carries subtle cues about your speaking personality, presence, and emotions.

Steve Jobs delivered one of my favorite speeches at the Apple Conference when he introduced the iPod . He knew exactly how to use the pitch in his voice and strike just the right tone to create excitement. I still remember some famous lines from what he shared: "iPod is 1000 songs in your pocket,” and “This is a quantum leap because, for most people, it holds their entire music library.”

Both pitch and tone shape your speaking personality, making you a memorable and impactful speaker. They’re why colleagues look forward to hearing from you in meetings or why you attend conferences eager to listen to a favorite business expert deliver the keynote.

Pitch and Tone: Know the Difference

Let's break down the difference between pitch and tone because the two terms are?often confused.

Pitch refers to the highs and lows of your voice and how you modulate it. This variation adds interest and depth when you speak. For instance, a higher pitch can convey energy, enthusiasm, optimism, and often makes a speaker seem more youthful and approachable. However, in situations like meetings or public speaking, a higher pitch—especially when your voice rises at the end of sentences (a pattern known as “upspeak”)—can also signal nervousness or uncertainty.

On the other hand, lower-pitched voices are typically perceived as confident, authoritative, and trustworthy professionals, maybe even sounding more mature and experienced than other professionals with higher voices.

The most engaging speakers know how to vary their pitch, skillfully using the full range of highs and lows in their voices to keep listeners attentive and involved.

Your tone is slightly different; it’s how your voice comes across, and your tone what makes you stand out. For example, you can strike a few different tones as a speaker. Ask yourself, is your speaking tone any of the following:

• Direct or Indirect?
• Humorous or Serious?
• Enthusiastic or Lackluster?
• Casual or Business Professional?
• Conversational or Formal?
• Assertive or Passive?
• Energetic or Reserved?
• Optimistic or Pessimistic?

Meanwhile, a monotone voice can often make a speaker seem bored, uninterested, or emotionally distant, which can make listening a challenge. It’s difficult to stay engaged with a monotone speaker for long, and audiences tend to lose interest quickly.

Think of your voice's tone as more of the style or delivery of the information you're sharing.

Striking a tone can also depend on your audience. You may adjust how you come across based on what you know about your audience.

Voice and Emotions

While facial expressions and micro expressions reveal your emotions in an instant, how does your voice leak how you feel? The people around you can detect whether the sound of your voice conveys happiness, stress, anger, surprise, or any number of emotions you may be feeling.?

Here are a few points to consider about voice and emotions:

• Excitement and Enthusiasm: A higher pitch often indicates excitement or enthusiasm, suggesting that the speaker is interested and engaged in the topic.
• Nervousness or Anxiety: A higher pitch can also signal nervousness or anxiety, especially when combined with other cues like rapid speech or increased volume.
• Confidence and Authority: A lower pitch can convey confidence and authority, suggesting that the speaker feels secure and in control.
• Sadness or Melancholy: A lower pitch, slower pace, and softer volume can indicate sadness or melancholy.

In Charles Duhigg’s book Super Communicators , he discusses how companies use software to uncover the emotions detected in their customers’ voices. When I began my career in communications, detecting emotions was simply using your ears to listen carefully and, if you were in person, watching body language. Today, a computer screen flashes a message when a customer is pleased, frustrated, or dissatisfied during a conversation and offers instructions on how to change your voice and approach to a conversation.?

To connect and engage more effectively, detecting the emotion in the customer’s voice helps customer service agents adjust their pitch, tone, and even the speed of their voices to match the customer. The adjusted approach sends a signal of understanding, leading to a deeper understanding and connection.?

Voice and Intentions

The sound of your voice may also give away your underlying intentions. For instance, your voice can signal that you're:

• Asking a Question: A rising pitch at the end of a sentence often signals a question, indicating that the speaker is seeking information or clarification.
• Making a Statement: A steady or falling pitch at the end of a sentence suggests a statement, indicating that the speaker is making a declaration or assertion.
• Emphasizing a Point: A sudden increase or decrease in pitch can emphasize a particular point, drawing attention to the message's importance.
• Expressing Surprise or Shock: A sharp increase in pitch can convey surprise or shock, indicating that the speaker has encountered something unexpected.

However, it’s essential to recognize that voice pitch can vary depending on cultural context, individual differences, and the specific situation. By paying attention to a speaker's voice pitch, you can gain valuable insights into the person’s emotional state and underlying intentions.

Tuning in to Hear Your Voice

Although your voice sends signals and cues to the people around you, do you know how you sound?

When people speak, they don’t hear themselves precisely as others hear them. The bones in the skull conduct sound waves differently than the air, which is how others hear your voice. The result is a slight distortion of the sound. This phenomenon is called self-hearing distortion or voiceprint distortion. It's why people often think their own recorded voice sounds different from how they imagine it.

My favorite technique for hearing how you really sound is to cup your hands and move your ears forward when you speak. This technique, known as ear occlusion, temporarily blocks some of the sound waves that travel directly to your inner ear, allowing you to hear more of the sound that travels through the air to your outer ear. With ear occlusion, you get a more accurate representation of how your voice sounds to others, as it reduces the impact of self-hearing distortion.

Here are a few more ways to hear your voice:

• Recording yourself is the most common method. Try using your smartphone, computer, or dedicated recording device to capture your voice. The recording will provide a more accurate representation of how you sound to others.
• Using a voice changer app can simulate how you might sound to others by altering your voice's pitch, tone, and other characteristics.
• Asking someone else is another direct way to have friends or family members provide feedback on how your voice sounds to them.
• Seeking professional help if you're concerned about your technical quality. There are speech therapists and vocal coaches who provide personalized feedback and guidance.

Now consider how you can harness the power of your voice to connect with others on a deeper level. By understanding the impact of pitch, tone, and the emotions your voice conveys, you can become a more effective communicator and leader.

BONUS: Personal Branding for Executives and Managers with Steven Picanza ????

In case you missed it on the DM Show, special guest Steven Picanza discusses how to craft a standout personal brand, his playbook to help you identify your area of expertise, develop your positioning and bring your purpose to life through evocative ideas and effective marketing techniques.