What Does it Really Mean to be Refined?

What Does it Really Mean to be Refined?

Some people think that being refined is all about high society and those with plenty of money. Many think it’s about status or prestige. In the dictionary, it says that a person who is refined is “elegant and cultured in appearance, manner, or taste.” It also describes refined as: cultured, polished, stylish, elegant, sophisticated, polite, gracious, well-mannered, well bred, gentlemanly and ladylike.

Would a refined gentleman or lady ever be outspoken and give their opinions freely, even though it is not considered popular? Would it be against a “well-bred” society? If a lady were considered refined, what would she most likely do to defend herself? Would she speak up for her values or just bow down to another’s opinion? Would she defend herself?

When reading about the many adventures of Frances Davies, who was noted as a “lady of refinement,” it was interesting to find out what a courageous woman she was. Frances had attended a private school and received an education that set her apart from other young women. Even though she was referred to as a lady of refinement, she did things that other women of her status wouldn’t even think of. In other words, she didn’t live up to what society expected of a “refined lady.”

Once when she saw some thieves stealing her grapes, she quickly dawned a cavalry uniform and grabbed a sword. She was determined to save her grapes. Standing on the porch, she brandished the gleaming weapon in the air as she yelled: “Leave or perish!” The thieves were surprised to see her and took off running. This was one example of her spunk. Frances Davies had grit.

Taking the many adventures of Frances, my great grandmother, I created a historical romance called A Lady of Refinement. The main character, Serenity, is looking for someone special, a “hero” just like Ivanhoe. Even though Ivanhoe is fictional, written by Sir Walter Scott, no one seems to measure up to this valiant knight until Jonathan comes along. At first, he seems so quiet and reserved and she has no interest in him. But somehow this brave firefighter gradually wins her heart with his many heroic deeds. As she gets to know him, Serenity soon realizes there is much more to this man than she originally thought.

Reviewer Louise Pledge wrote: “How I enjoy finding a book that will not let me put it down until I'm done!?This was the case with A Lady of Refinement.?Linda Weaver Clarke used a true story of her ancestor’s as a base, and it rang familiar to me. The main character, Serenity, is the refined lady, and it was such a delight when she bested a few arrogant males.?My favorite character, however, was Jonathan, who was very taken with Serenity.?Time will tell if he is successful at capturing her attention.”

BreAnne Okoren narrated this historical romance for Audible audiobooks and it has received great reviews. BreAnne’s talent makes the characters feel real and come alive. Her Welsh accent was impressive. When there was a humorous incident, the laughter in her voice made the scene enjoyable. The emotion BreAnne gives to each character is genuine and the reader can feel how the character feels. This narrator understands the characters.

Author Gail Pallotta said: “Jonathan’s infatuation leads him to try many approaches to get to know Serenity better, even to the extent of following her brother William’s sometimes bad advice. I enjoyed this sweet love story, especially Jonathan trying desperately to win over Serenity. Based on true events of the author’s ancestor, the book takes the reader back to a gentler time when men were more chivalrous and a woman like Serenity more difficult to win over.”

Watch a book trailer narrated by BreAnne Okoken.


Lady of Refinement is available ?on Amazon and on Audible narrated by BreAnne Okoren.

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