What Does Being a Connection Mean to You?

Although this title may appear to be a rhetorical question, it is in fact an open question intended to spark a discussion on what the term “connection” means to you, so feel free to weigh in below in the Comments section.

For myself, I have approximately 4000 connections, and I would argue that most fit into one or more of the following categories

I Have an Account But…

…I really don’t use it or ever check it. I got an account because everyone else I know has one. It has no information about me other than the places I have worked and the dates. If LinkedIn were our solar system, I’m kind of like an asteroid floating out there somewhere.

You Are a Number

This type of user will send you an invitation to connect, but that is all you will ever get from him or her. When people invite me, I follow up right away with a “Thanks for connecting. How can I help?” message. No response. Ever.

I Am Selling You Something

I agree with the title and premise of Daniel Pink’s book, To Sell Is Human. Whether we are asking for a raise, negotiating with a spouse/child/friend, or actually offering goods or services, we are selling. Personally, I have no issue at all connecting with someone who wants to sell me something. In fact, I would be quite hypocritical if I rejected them on that basis. But if you are going to sell to me, I have some questions/challenges for you:

Are you selling to me based on my profile or a perceived need, or are you selling to me and the world without qualifying first?

•  Do you have a clear value prop?
• Can you take “no” for answer when there is clearly not a fit?
• If I do not buy from you, is that the end of our relationship, or would you be willing to make an introduction to others in your network?

By the way, I would also include recruiters in this category, as they are selling you an opportunity.

This Is My Online Resume

This is also, I would argue, a form of selling; you are selling yourself. Again, nothing wrong with that, but it is another “asteroid” within the LinkedIn universe that may get the occasional visitor, especially by recruiters, based on keyword searches.

To really be effective in any form of selling, you need to be the next type of user.

I Want a Relationship

While this is the minority of users, in my opinion this is what LinkedIn is all about and where you derive the most value. By “relationship”, I don’t mean the kind that requires an emotional investment and we bond over ice cream. To me, a relationship means that we see mutual benefit in connecting and recognize that simply being a number in each’s profile will not suffice. It means moving beyond LinkedIn to a series of emails or phone calls that may even lead to a coffee or lunch. Regardless of the medium or location, it’s about getting to understand the person and not the profile. Yes, I may be selling to you, or you to me, but it also goes beyond sales. It’s where we understand each other and consider whether we can help each other directly or make introductions to others that can. In a relationship you exist. You matter. And I may not be able to address your issues, but I will at least respond and tell you as such.

So…? What are your thoughts? What category do you fit under? Are there others I missed? And what I would be most interested in hearing is how you have successfully created relationships with others who simply see you as a number and have not responded to anything beyond simply connecting.