What Does it All Mean?

Last week I made up my mind to go on a full-on educational blitz on Linkedin. I wanted to teach my followers and subscribers about my new direction which is advocacy for parents at the workplace.

As a queer mom of a transgender child, it is imperative that the world knows what it really feels like to be me. One of the ways I am doing it is by showing up on Sundays on my live-streamed podcast, "Moms 4 Trans Kids Podcast", through daily posts like this one, and through this weekly newsletter.

Hanging out on social media daily, I find more and more that enough people don't actually know all the basics. By that, I mean even the letters of the alphabet that describe the community, nor some of the basic concepts and terminology used, and as a result, too many misconceptions are spread.

Today, I want to take you back to the basics a bit, shall we? Let's look at definitions, lingo, and verbiage, and then share some misconceptions and burst them. As always, you are welcome to ask me any questions you might have in the comments :)

LGBTQ+: An acronym that stands for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Queer/Questioning, and the '+' indicates the inclusion of other sexualities, genders, and identities not specifically covered in these letters.

Lesbian: A woman who is attracted to other women.

Gay: A person who is attracted to members of the same gender. While it can refer to both men and women, it is often used to describe men.

Bisexual (Bi): A person who is attracted to both men and women.

Transgender (Trans): A person whose gender identity does not align with the sex they were assigned at birth.

Queer: Once used as a derogatory term, it has been reclaimed by many in the LGBTQ+ community to describe a fluid or non-specific sexual orientation or gender identity.

Questioning: Refers to individuals who are exploring their sexual orientation, gender identity, or gender expression.

Cisgender: People whose gender identity matches the sex they were assigned at birth.

Non-binary: A gender identity that doesn't fit within the traditional male/female binary.

Genderqueer: An umbrella term for gender identities other than man and woman.

Intersex: A term used for a variety of conditions where a person is born with a reproductive or sexual anatomy that doesn't fit typical definitions of female or male.

Asexual (Ace): Someone who has little to no sexual attraction to others.

Pansexual: A person who experiences attraction to individuals regardless of their gender or gender identity.

This list is definitely not fully encompassing, there are still a lot of words like Demisexual, Agender, Bigender, Demigirl, Demiboy, Aromantic, Polyamorous, etc. I guess as your teacher, I can ask you to look those terms up as your homework...he he he.

Misconceptions about the queer community are soooo many!! What I have realized is that the more visible Q+ folks become in the community, the harder the haters come for us. The more ridiculous the lies out there about us are, the more misconceptions and disinformation people are willing to spread.

Some of the misconceptions are so radical, that I am not sharing them. Here is a list of 7 more common ones suggested by my friendly Chat GPT that I agree completely with.

1. Being LGBTQ+ is a choice.

Fact: Sexual orientation and gender identity are inherent and cannot be chosen or changed.

2. All transgender/trans people undergo surgery.

Fact: Not all trans persons choose to or can afford to have surgery. Their identity is valid regardless.

3. Bisexuality is just a phase or means someone is confused.

Fact: Bisexuality is a valid and stable sexual orientation (that's me)

4. Being LGBTQ+ is "contagious" or can be "taught".

Fact: One's sexuality or gender identity cannot be influenced by external factors.

5. Asexuality is the same as celibacy.

Fact: Asexuality is a lack of sexual attraction, while celibacy is the choice to abstain from sexual activity.

6. There are only two genders.

Fact: Gender is a spectrum, and there are many genders beyond just male and female.

1. All LGBTQ+ people have the same experiences. Fact: Every individual's experience is unique based on their cultural, racial, socio-economic, and personal circumstances.Understanding these terms and dispelling misconceptions is crucial for fostering inclusivity and support, particularly at the workplace where your coworker next door could very well be a parent of a queer child.Cheers! Dr. Lulu