What do you BELIEVE about yourself?

I am currently undertaking a meditation course with Monique Rhodes on how to become your own best friend. I was interested to do another layer of research on that voice in my head I have name 'Mavis my sabateur' - feisty little princess she is. Tells me all the things I am really crap at and my history is that I actually buy it.

Here's what she says to me:

• I am not good enough
• I don’t fit in anywhere
• I am unworthy
• People who say nice things to me don’t mean them
• I will fail
• I am confused
• I am fat

I now see these wee statement as negative beliefs. I have done some work to see where they have come from and they go way back. It's been a fascinating exercise to dive into. Not particularly enjoyable I might add, but it has been worthwhile.

I did some writing on what it felt like to believe that stuff about myself and it didn't feel very good - I can promise you that. I would never say or believe these things about anyone else. More importantly, I would never treat my best friend like that. Wow!

Pen in hand, I wrote myself a list of all the really cool people in my #circleofinfluence, my #community, my best mates, colleagues and family. As I looked at that list I was big time impressed of the calibre of people who choose to be in #connection with me. So many people can't be wrong eh? So I had a conversation with Mavis and set her straight.

What I know to be true of my clients, friends and my community is that we all feel this way from time to time. It's pretty normal. Some try to hide it and go into denial and others are more open and upfront about it. Sharing these things with my clients helps them to feel a spot of relief and a realisation that they are not an alien.

As I got curious and delved into what I actually do believe, I had to look all those statements above and check in on how they are serving me today. Guess what? They don't. We have decided to part ways and I am actively working on putting that old baggage down. I've got a lid on that suitcase full of negative beliefs and I'm taking it to the Antarctic to drop it in the ocean and sink the buggers.

“We tend to think about ourselves as neutral processors of the world, but the reality is that our belief systems shape what rises to the level of our attention in the first place.”

— Nour Kteily

Kteily says, people with contrasting beliefs about social hierarchy can look at the same situation and see different things. “The conclusions that we arrive at in terms of how we perceive the world are shaped in important ways by the beliefs that we hold”. Great reading from Kellogg Insight based on Nour Kteily's research here.

I find this fascinating and curious as to how some people just don't see the gender inequity and others do. It all stems from our belief systems. Sean Mendes has something to say about that here. It's a great track to listen to!

I believe in a world where women are valued for their wisdom and experience.

I believe in gender equity

What do you believe?