What to do when your inner critic says you're not enough...

I am absolutely thrilled to share that I just completed a foundational 6-week coaching program on the judge/sage within all of us, and earned my orange belt in mental fitness by leveraging a unique research driven operating system. I am also continuing my training towards my black belt as a certified PQ (Positive Intelligence) Coach over the next 12-months. If you want to learn more about PQ, click here.

And I highly recommend listening to Shirzad Chamine's (PQ Founder) Tedx. His story is FIRE!

"We each have a Saboteur voice who belittles us and shakes our confidence when we make a mistake. It is the voice we hear most easily when we are feeling tired or alone. It is the voice that derails us, assigns blame and keeps us from doing what we most want to do. It is the voice that tells us we are not enough." – Kelly Kienzle

For me, this program appealed to my nerdy interest in neuroscience and human behavior, steeped in rigorous research. Plus I was looking for powerful tools to pass along to my coaching clients while simultaneously investing in my ongoing personal/professional growth.

Before learning about PQ, I truly believed that I was a slave to certain dysfunctional patterns of behavior and thought patterns when dealing with difficult people/situations in my life. I resigned myself to believing (likely a bit of a cop out too!) that I didn't have control over my reaction. I felt powerless against my emotions that seemed to have a foothold over my mood and attitude without my consent.

PSA: It is all a BIG FAT LIE!

As an example, I tested out my newly minted skills by agreeing to spend time with someone I didn't really care for because she was self-centered and severely lacked self-awareness, but I reluctantly said yes when she asked to spend time with me.

We agreed to meet at a beautiful nature conservatory and walk around the picturesque gardens. I thought to myself, "What could possibly go wrong?"

Well, you guessed it! She talked non-stop about how great she was and why she was always right in nearly every situation.

My mind started to go down a predictable path of annoyance and regret, but in that moment I made a conscious decision to enlist my Sage powers by imagining her as a 5 year old little girl who may have been bullied and marginalized. And in that split second, my emotions simmered down instead of boiling over. I also did some PQ reps (equivalent to mindfulness work) to get out of my head and get grounded again.

And by the end of her soliloquy, I was still at peace, listening actively and imparting deep compassion to this human being who clearly needed love and reassurance that day.

"Fortunately, we have another voice in us that is our Sage. The Sage is the voice who can step back from a stressful situation and assess it with rational thought and an open mind. Our Sage voice is the one who understands we are all mere humans who are simply doing his and her best." – Kelly Kienzle

In a nutshell, I learned how to harness my mind to work in alignment with who I was at my core (Sage) instead of listening to the punishing lies that derailed my true intentions (Saboteurs). I learned so much about myself and simple ways to put my saboteurs in their rightful place.

The best thing is... I didn't have to learn yet another new behavior that I would not be able to sustain long term. I learned how to re-purpose every moment throughout the day to get grounded and not let the toxicity of the external world or the nagging negative chatter wreak havoc on my day.

If you're interested in learning more, simply e-mail me [email protected] and I am glad to tell you more about my experience (no strings attached).

Your friend and coach,

Grace