What to do when someone calls out your unconscious bias ??

Welcome to Simply Diversity. This bimonthly letter breaks down key diversity concepts and explains how you can apply them... simply. There are plenty of terms heard ‘round the Internet as we prioritize diversity, inclusion and belonging in everything we do. This newsletter explains what these concepts are, why they’re important, and how to practice them.?

What started as a post about a child being bullied at school turned into an unconscious bias lesson for the ages.

Break it down:?

Take a look at the post on the left. What do you assume about the child in the picture?

This post is a fantastic “teachable moment” about unconscious bias. Here’s what happened:

1. The parent in the post uses he/him pronouns to describe the child. The parent’s point is that his son should feel a sense of pride for showcasing his heritage — despite cruel treatment from others.?
2. A commenter makes an assumption about the child based on the picture — and uses she/her pronouns to describe the child.?
3. Notice how James uses this teachable moment to educate about the unconscious bias around the perceived relationship between long hair and gender.
4. Now, notice the defensiveness in the comments from David — “it was a simple mistake, not unconscious bias.”

What do you think: Is this instance of misgendering a child from their picture a simple mistake or unconscious bias??

Trick question: Unconscious Bias IS a simple mistake!?

Unconscious bias is something we all have. So why the defensiveness? David doesn’t want to admit there is unconscious bias — they prefer to call this gender mix-up a simple mistake.?

Why? Because there is a pervasive and incorrect notion that if someone calls out your unconscious bias that they are calling you a “bad person” — a racist, sexist, homophobic, etc.?

But being called out for unconscious bias is not an indictment of your character but part of being human. Remember, calling attention to unconscious bias isn’t calling YOU out — it’s calling out a mistake you made.??

What do we do when we make mistakes? We resolve to do better. As James eloquently suggested, reframing and educating can help us uncover and overcome our unconscious biases (and thank you, James, for recommending our Unconscious Bias course as a resource!).?

Do Something Different:

Remember, we all have unconscious bias. As we recognize it — often because our peers take the time to point it out to us — we must get over our knee-jerk defensiveness and seek to be open and learn from our simple mistakes:?

1. When you are called out for unconscious bias, reserve your judgment — both of yourself and the person who called you out.?
2. Take the time to reflect on your own assumptions about others and how they might inform how you think, work, and connect with others.?
3. Educating yourself about unconscious bias will help you better identify and correct it.

Start small and start now. Take our popular unconscious bias course — it was LinkedIn’s most popular course in 2021! In just 30 minutes, you’ll learn to let go of defensiveness, and be more open and curious about yourself and others when you make an (unconscious) mistake.

Now, I want to hear from you: have you caught yourself making an assumption based on unconscious bias? Has someone called you out before? How did you react? Let me know in the comments – I’ve shared an example of my own unconscious bias and what I learned, and I’d love to hear from you.

About Stacey Gordon and Rework Work:

Stacey Gordon is Executive Advisor and Diversity Strategist of Rework Work where she and her team coach and counsel executive leaders on DEI strategies for business, while offering a no-nonsense approach to unconscious bias education for the broader employee population. Stacey’s unconscious bias course was the most popular course on LinkedIn Learning platform in 2021 and it has also been translated into multiple languages. Stacey is also the founder and host of the Rework Work Community , a free diversity, equity, and inclusion learning and practice space for professionals. You can find Stacey’s book, UNBIAS: Addressing Unconscious Bias at Work , at Amazon, Barnes & Nobles, and wherever books are sold.