What COVID Taught Me!

This can’t be happening to me. Why me, god! Why me! Well, this (with a lot more panic) was my reaction when I got tested positive for COVID-19. The test process itself was so disgusting and on the top of it, being tested positive was too much and I was going nuts and how! I mean I took all possible precautions since the start - had cancelled my planned vacation, didn’t have even a single day out, spent mine and my loved ones special days at home, cooked food at home alone along with all the other work all these months - and yet, here I was - COVID positive! Life’s like this sometimes (most of the time) - testing our tolerance to everything good and pushing awfuls in a continuous loop. But, there’s always a silver lining. Sometimes visible during the hardships, sometimes we realize when we look back.

I’m not going to talk about medical stuff, there’s a lot of it online and I hope we may not even need it in the months to come, and anyway I am always always available for it in case anyone needs any information/advice about it. Here, I am going to talk about my journey, my learnings during the past 2-3 weeks. These weeks weren’t all great - I had fever, pain, anxiety, weakness and all the stuff which nobody should go through - but now that I look back, there are few things which I learnt that I would not have had I not been completely isolated. Even during the lockdown in March, I had comparatively free time but I did not really had ‘me time’. This time it was just me. Alone. No office, no home, nothing. Just me, the hotel room, TV and that’s it. Definitely way more personal than lockdown.  

I spent a total of 14 days in complete isolation and trust me, not even a single day was the same. I was hopeless and couldn’t get up from the bed on some days and I was at ease and felt like painting, talking to people on other days. These feelings weren’t directly related to my health, btw. I had days when I was having troubles health wise but was happy and other days when I felt fine health wise but was cranky. All the things around me were the same - The room, the food, everything was the same. What was the difference then? Now that I realize it was all about my state of mind. The days I was at ease mentally, things did not bother me much and the same things bothered me a lot on the other days. The quality of our life indeed depends on our state of mind. It's our state of mind that can help us make the best of our circumstances, to bloom where we are planted. No matter how many times we hear or read about it, the real essence hits you only when you go through it.

Another major realization is kind of shocking to me and could take you by surprise too. So, there were a lot of series and movies which were pending since long due to the busy days in normal life and I thought what better time other than this to finish it all and it was in fact my only hope to survive the days ahead happily - Because that is what keeps us sane in the normal days, isn’t it? I was so excited to watch it all. But trust me on this, the excitement didn’t last for more than a day. Okay, two. Not more than 2 days for sure. The fun started to vanish gradually and I didn’t want to see a single episode the third day. There was an open space in the hotel where we were allowed to walk and the idea of being there sounded better than binge watching! It was much more soothing. Maybe our parents aren’t that wrong about not indulging too much on the screen and spending some time with nature? Worked for me at least! 

It’s been a week today since I have come back from isolation and I still have the after effects. But, I am trying to be in a good space mentally and appreciate all the good things in life. Two things I’m definitely going to try doing more frequently and would suggest everyone try once - One is to regularly take out some me time where you are completely alone and can talk to yourself. Second, to spend a little bit more time with nature. 

Stay safe! :)