What Cancer Treatment Taught Me About Managing Uncertainty

A few weeks ago, a fellow cancer survivor shared an article with me—and oh my, did it resonate. The title: An oncologist’s prescription for managing fear and chaos in the COVID-19 pandemic.

The author’s sentiments struck a chord with me because—well—he’s spot on with the similarities between what we are all collectively experiencing with COVID-19 and how someone feels when they’re diagnosed with cancer and then go through treatment. People who are diagnosed with cancer don’t exactly see it coming. I know this first-hand as I was diagnosed with breast cancer in 2016. We are typically going about our lives, our normal routines, checking off to-do lists, making plans to go out to dinner with friends, booking vacations, etc. We’re living a “normal” life when we’re handed a cancer diagnosis. That’s the first wave of shock, fear, and grief. Sounds familiar, right?

Those feelings of shock, fear, and grief persist throughout treatment, too. They’re compounded by the limitations during treatment due to a suppressed immune system: you can’t go out and have to change many aspects of your life. You can really see the parallels to COVID-19 now, can’t you? 

As a breast cancer survivor, I am here to tell you that what you’re feeling right now, what you’ve been feeling since COVID-19 arrived in our country, and what’s to come is actually quite normal. And you aren’t alone. But perhaps the best thing I can give you is hope. In time, you will pull yourself back up. You find a temporary normal. You also find joy again in small things. And you feel supported and connected to others in ways you never did before.

But to get to that place, you first need acceptance. Acceptance of what is really important. And similar to now with COVID-19, a relentless focus on your own well-being above all else to help you cope with and manage the stress of uncertainty. For me, exercise and sleep are key—and they also are things I can still control – both now and when I was going through treatment. During cancer treatment, you never want to do an internet search on your symptoms—and that holds true now. Be intentional about what you read on the internet or the news you watch (and consider having a news cut-off time). We need information to keep ourselves safe, but that’s it!

While some of my experience with cancer may have prepared me better for the COVID-19 pandemic, no one should feel like they need to have this all figured out—because no one does! There is no playbook for what we are going through. Accepting this, I believe, makes room for hope and joy. And finding joy is really important—even when it feels like we shouldn’t be joyful—because our emotions affect those around us. I’m not suggesting that you be irrationally optimistic, but a little bit of authentic joy goes a long way. That’s also why I think hope is so powerful—now and during cancer treatment. Hope gives you the opportunity to believe in better days, to imagine and feel them, yet it often lays dormant until times of crisis. Like many other cancer patients, I found hope during my cancer treatment and I am finding it now in many of the same ways. And I wish the same for you!